I Fully comprehend what they mean by the struggle is real.
My true self is what I tend conceal
Afraid of what I feel
And lately it hurts as I began this process to heal

It's my pride I wish would die along side with the plenty of tears I cried
Its the chambers of secrets that silences My truth I tend to hide
Its the bottled up emotions that internally lie.
Its the unheard voices on the inside

Its the toxic and venomous things I can do without.
Its the violent roars from the untamed screams and shouts
I breathe in, and I  breathe out
I'm letting it go, I'm letting it all out
Then I sense the spirit of nature surrounding and filling me all about

Its what my mind perceives as pain that  My soul and body feels, embraces, and dances in the midst of the storm's rain
As it cleanses and purifies my lower self composed of dirt, blemishes, and bloody tainted stains.
Its all about the experience of learning, character building, and strength to help me sustain.
Because one would never know joy without pain, or sunshine without a little rain.
And now I'm alive again With Gold,  Royalty, And Power Flowing through my veins carrying microscopic Intellectual messages to and from my Renewed brain.

A month ago,
life was so predictable.
A never-ending routines thinking,
for how long am I going to be like this?
But then you came along,
and I finally found where I belong.

We had our own separate worlds,
but a same life where it's still dull and grey.
Felt like something was missing,
we didn't know what it was yet.
when we still didn't know what to say,
I found a lost soul like my own.

Then comes the second day,
we talked for hours straight.
Endless stories and jokes were said.
At one point you caught me off guard,
with the three special words you've said.
I love you, so random and out there.
Still made me smile nonetheless.

In a span of three days,
you already took my heart away.
Within three days,
I knew I had to meet  you one day.
For three days,
I was falling slowly every single day.
I finally called you mine on a Sunday.

A month have passed,
though it feels like only a week.
And every time you're the one I seek.
We talked, cried, argued, and laughed.
I've never felt like this, so loved.
You became my life, my love.
The best one I'll ever have.

There she is, reading a book she had been hooked on. She zoned out of reality and immersed herself in her own private little space. I can't help but look.

"What?" She asks, every time she catches me staring at her.

"What? Nothing"

Little does she know that I'm not only staring because of her mesmerizing beauty, but because of her existence. Because she's too good to be true. Because she's so surreal. Because I can't believe that the girl of my dreams is right in front of me-- the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. And yet she wonders why I stare at her, gazing upon those eyes that hold the universe, and I'm just about to get lost in them.

First of all, she is very loud. She could whisper, but it would still echo across the room, especially when she gets excited. Make sure you're ready for her unexpected shouting and ranting, especially in vernacular. She's a girl with a machine gun for a mouth. Whatever you do, don't say 'good night' all of a sudden, or she'll flood you with five hundred messages. She won't stop ranting about anything, and never forget to kiss her-- kiss her on the lips if she's talking too much, and that's how you get her to stop talking.

2. She can be very clingy. Make sure when you're texting her, you have nothing else to do, because if you're multitasking, you're in big trouble. She'll worry about you, if you don't reply in around five minutes she would wonder if you died or if you're cheating on her. Her time is precious, spend yours on her and you won't regret it.

3. She won't ask for much, aside from Onitsuka Tigers, but she's a sucker for handmade stuff. She also loves surprises. Spoil her a little. Make her wonder what you're doing, then surprise her with something out of the ordinary. She'll either cry or laugh out loud or start hitting you, and you'll fall in love with her even more.

4. She is full of effort, make sure you give more than she gives you. Always stay up with her no matter how late, just because she doesn't want to sleep yet. The fatigue is temporary, but the feelings are forever. She would always prefer long walks to a place over taking a ride. She loves the little things you do, like staying by the opposite side when crossing the street, or grabbing her waist when you pass by men, or when you slide a flower in her hair.

5. Never forget important events, because she's a very forgetful person. Remember them for her, remind her what happened on your last date, because all she remembers is what she felt. You'll then realize how crazy weird she is. She's a mystery, sometimes she would talk about the most random things all of a sudden, then start hitting you for no reason. She demands-- no, deserves, attention. She's got a rough history of boys. She's broken. She's a puzzle piece left unsolved, and it's your turn to piece her together.

6. Cross oceans for her. If you don't sing in public, now's the time to commit social suicide just for her. You'll be surprised that she would sing along. Compliment her outfits, but make sure she doesn't show too much skin. Dance for her, sweep her off of your feet. Make cheesy, lovey dovey poems or post a picture of her beautiful face, because she is the definition of a phenomenon, something that is rare and valuable that you can't miss it.

7. Be patient. Expect fights, and a lot of them. Expect screaming at each other, all because of even the smallest of problems. A tiny thing you did would make her furious, but that's better than her not caring at all. She cares a lot, that's why she's fighting. She doesn't want this to go to waste. She doesn't want to lose you. But in the end, all she needs is reassurance and a big, warm hug to make sure that you'll always be there for her. Remember, there will be rainy days, gloomy skies, or even blizzards, but she'll always be your pocketful of sunshine.

8. Never, ever, ever think of giving up on her. She's a diamond, hard to find, and on demand. Don't let her go. Don't you ever think of her being better off with other guys, because other guys would not treat her right. She's the greatest girl you would ever have, so don't you ever settle for anyone less. Once she's yours, keep her. Keep her all to yourself. Be territorial, be selfish, be proud that you have her.

And that's how you date my girlfriend, because I once had her, but I didn't realize all of this until I let her go.