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E Lynch Apr 2017
You smiled as you cut me,
convincing me it was for my own good.

As I bled you smiled,
and queried my current state.

I panicked and cried,
as I saw it seep through my shirt.

I begged for help,
for anything to make it stop.

You looked upon me,
faked pity in your eyes.

‘I wish I could do something to help’,
you could have considered the consequences.
E Lynch Feb 2015
'Look at me'*
She spat at the mirror.
'What's wrong with you?'
'Everything is wrong.'
She stares at herself and wrinkles her nose in disgust.
'My hair is limp, my eyes look dead, I'm gaining wrinkles and I'm getting fatter.'
She sighed and frowned hard at herself.
'You're very ******* yourself don't you think? You have positive qualities inside and out.'
She stared into her own eyes with a venomous glare.
'No. I don't. I'm unpredictable and unpleasant and...'
'And...?'*
Her eyes welled up.
'Different.'
'You have a mental illness... You cannot help that.'
Her face turned from the mirror wanting to smash the image of her face into a million pieces.
'At least if I were beautiful on the outside it'd be different to how I feel inside.'
'Well how do you feel inside?'
'Misunderstood, abnormal, confused, different and ugly, very very ugly. I wish it were as easy to fix a personality disorder as it is to fix a blemish.'
She avoids her reflection as she leaves the bathroom and continues on with her day.
E Lynch Feb 2015
Idiots don't do drugs.
Think about the statement,
you may disagree initially
but the more you ponder it,
the more you will realise it is true.

Sure everyone experiments,
smokes a joint, pops a pill...
They have a good time,
they leave and go home
thinking 'Yeah that was fun'.

You won't find the bodies of idiots
going into decay
from addiction to a substance
that they need in their life
to escape from the weight of reality.

You won't see below average people
question their ideals
or moral standpoints
you won't hear them questioning
the world around them either.

You won't find a stupid person
crushed from self doubt
and turning to a substance
to feel better for a time
because they simply don't think that way.

These people don't do depression
or mental disorders
on the contrary
I've found many an idiot
claim they don't exist at all.

It's a frightening thing to think
that a ****** addict we pass on
the street could possibly have the answer or cure
to world hunger, cancer or aids locked
away in their brain and even scarier that it will die with them.

I fear for our society
idiots are taking hold
and so full of confidence
that their ideas are great
while brilliant minds fade away without a trace.
E Lynch Dec 2014
'I wonder how I'll handle the next goodbye...?'
This thought haunts and hounds me even at our happiest moments
lurking in the shadows is the constant reminder of the fact that we
are mostly far apart...

Our closeness exists over Skype and conversation and while
I wouldn't change us for the world I do yearn to reach out
and kiss you and hold you and touch you at times...
More times than I'd care to admit.

On the bad days I would give anything to just lay in your arms
and allow myself the comfort of feeling broken
because around you I know I can do that and you
won't judge me for it.

I want to be there when things go wrong for you
I want to be the comforting embrace when you come in from
a long shift, the sanctuary from a world that got the better
of you for today.

I want to be the first to celebrate your successes and cheer you
on from the sidelines when you finally reach the goals you've been
chasing and achieve the things you thought simply weren't possible
because I believed in you all along.

I want to be there for all the big things
and the little things
and the highs
and the lows
and the smiles
and the tears
I want to be there for good
Not visits but for life...

But for now there's still a departure gate
and a flight that cannot be missed
and so until next time I wait
when we meet again until our next kiss.
E Lynch Dec 2014
The internet shows the true decline of decent human beings.

Trolls roam free and unhindered hurting and hateful.

Intelligence is dragged down by ignorance and stupidity.

People band together and hate other people because they can.

Sure the internet exposes those odd glimmers of human hope and kindness.

Flashes in the pan of an otherwise hateful human race.

It's so easy to hurt others from behind a screen.

Cowards venting unknown issues that should be dealt with on a therapists couch.

Mentally unstable people gathering crowds to suckle from their teats of endless ignorance.

Stupidity is common and boundless and encouraged in todays world.

Christ forbid you should have a problem with society.

You will drown in sorrow and frustration surrounded by people who blindly accept and follow.

No minds of their own, just sheep to a slaughter, no voice, no vision no drive to do better.

It's a bane to have a brain in the modern world, where to think for yourself is a crime.

To question the status quo doesn't make you a revolutionary but dissatisfied and selfish.

I do not like what this place has become societies poison is turning humans into monsters.

Monsters who feed on ego and putting others down all in our boxes all labelled all judged.

Darkest wants and fantasies satisfied with the flick of a wrist and the click of a button.

But perhaps we were monsters all along and it just took the right trick for us to embrace it.
E Lynch Nov 2014
I was left wide open
as though cut by a knife

Everyone could see the hurt on my face
through the tears I cried

Shock and pain no noise
just a silence that filled the empty space

And that hole in my heart that consumes me
each and every day

Don't lie and say you'll love me forever
if you're after a good time girl

My old heart it loves too quickly
and smashed pieces take a long time to heal

Don't gift me the stars and the moon
if you're planning on parting tomorrow

Don't fill me full of love and hope
then dash it all with sorrow

If you're only going to use and abuse me
don't make yourself my world

Don't try and make me fall for you
if I'm not going to be your girl

And please, most of all,
don't promise me love and your life,
if you're only planning on spending tonight.
E Lynch Nov 2014
It's come to the point where I feel I need help
All these things that I'm feeling I can't deal with myself

I'm losing my temper I'm hurting loved one and friends
And at this point I'd just like it to end

I'm frightened sure but I'm at the end of my rope
And doing this alone I can no longer cope

The mood swings and tempers are out of control
The last thing I want is to end up alone

So I'm making the appointment despite all my fear
And praying to God they can help my head clear

I'd love to be normal and have full control
Something people take for granted, that they don't think of at all

It's like Jeckyl and Hyde are living in my brain
One is the real me, the other is angry, insane

The obsessions and fixations make my life a mess
Everything I do and say I over think, my mind is full of stress

Theres a person inside me I want to evict
They've hung around too long and they're being a ****

I want my mind back, all of it, now
I want you gone forever, see ya later ciao.
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