Your eyes are happy now.

I remember the first time
I peered through the window--
the shutters only half-open,
guarded from the newcomer
yet aware that you should
show some lifelight.
Cut sideways,
hardened steel
saw only what could be
cheaply afforded
in the exchange.

But slowly, eventually,
you widened the curtain
and peered out across the way
to see me standing sentinel--
You said hello.
Now the steel melts to snow
turns to pools of laughter
Even in the melancholy
you never shut the door.
I said hello.

Many a day
have led me to your door,
your window,
your eyes.
Tap the glass--
are you home?
I pray the answer
is never "no."

now when I think of love I want to puke,
the thought literally makes me sick to my stomach because I know now what it does to a person

how you lose yourself in someone else and then all of sudden you can't breathe anymore without them

I am promising myself to never be that stretched again,
to give myself a try for once, relying only on my intuition and will to power through life and relationships, never getting too blind to see things as they really are

I wanna know what it's like to be so good alone that the earth shatters when I take a step,
electricity radiates from my skin and my soul is so loud it shouts through my eyes

The salty spray
Crashing to the shore
Takes my breath away
I want to see more.
The coastline curves
Around the glorious bay
The beach huts serve
The finest cafe au lait.
Crunching pebbles underfoot
Sand in-between my toes
Forgetting the time it’s took
But then nobody knows.
Knows my whereabouts
Where I have been
Cannot hear my shouts
Or hear me scream
I’m joined by a lone gull
I offer him to share my lunch
In two seconds flat our space was full
Of hungry beaks eager to munch.
I enjoyed their company
Although I couldn’t hear myself think
There was that many
Birds fighting to eat and drink.
They eventually flew
They had other plans I could see
They had found someone new
And had finished with me.
I cared not a jot now and explored
The ragged coastline to the new town.
Rusty red boats were moored
Next to new ones clad in brown.
Ropes twisted, knotted and tied
Holding fast against the afternoon swell
The time suggests the incoming tide
My walk was over by order of the bell.

When I put my headphones on
Everything just seems to melt away

Then a slow upwelling of assorted instruments
Violin, cello, piano
I hum along

Then words; many of them, sometimes strangely arranged
Waiting to be interpreted
I sing

The song is always one that resonates within me
It has deeper meaning
I ponder

A drum beat unlike any other
Changing time and rhythm
I play along on my desk

I've never felt or experienced more
Than when I'm lost in my music

take me back to the day I laid eyes on you.
so I can ask you your name and tell you I'm in love with you.
and maybe it sounds crazy but I'm going to marry you.
take me back to the first time we skipped out on class together.
so you can hold my hand longer and not leave me this time.
and ill tell you that I know it's still so soon, but I want to hold your hand for forever, through whatever, always.
take me back to the day you crawled into bed with me and held me after I had fallen asleep.
so I can wake up in the middle of the night and tell you everything I'm too afraid to tell you in the daylight.
and ill admit that I think of you every day and strangely want to see your feet bare.. and.. your body.
take me back to the night we tried to have *** but you couldn't stop thinking of her.
so I can tell you it's okay if you aren't ready, because neither am I.
and if you want to just lay here, just exist together, ill tell you that's okay too. more than okay.
take me back to the day I held your head in my lap and we talked about everything that scared us.
so I can tell you not being with you scares me the most, and my heart never settles.
and I won't admit it but ill tell you with my eyes that I want you to keep me.
take me back to the moment we touched other people and for only a second, no longer, forgot each others name.
so I can run away from his lips, and into your arms.
and maybe then your fingers won't find her cheek, and she won't realize your eyes are the darkest brown, but your touch can melt anyone like honey.
take me back to the day we promised forever.
so we can walk away.
and maybe then it'll save us the pain
of you and I.