After all this time, do you still look into her eyes and try to see mine?

Love, the most intoxicating suffering I've ever known.

How rare it is that we both existed at the same time
just to destroy each other
I never knew the universe was so cruel

I feel like a tourist in my own life
Standing idle and watching things go by
Never gaining the courage needed to participate

I painted you a hundred skies, but you never wanted mine.

It's amazing watching skin heal and realizing you haven't.

Almost tastes a lot like you,
Drowns me in what might have been.
Your eyes tell an infinite amount of possible stories of the way our lives could have been.

You are familiar like a scab
Easy to pick at
Hard to heal
Definitely leaving a scar

Mistakes are comforting in a twisted sort of way
They’re familiar
Consistent
Resonating an indescribable amount of sorrow within the soul
The kind of pain that makes you feel alive
Real
Human
The reminder is encouraging

Failure tiptoes in like a surprise
Never seen by hopeful eyes
To try is a risk
And chance is lie
Better to admit defeat

These efforts have yet been recognized
Not visible
Never seen
Stuck in the void of in-between
Tears fall heavy on crumpled pages
Dances performed on empty stages

Survival is just a mask
Hope is such a thankless task
Battling against the world and yourself
Placed your dreams on the highest shelf

But belief is a beautiful thing
Fate changes with the weather
Brush yourself off and start anew
Released from your personal tether

Lost
A voyage of expression
Of pain
An examination of ones own worth
A date with desperation
A way to find solace, identity
The words kept by the heart and abused by the brain
Where dreams go to die and worries come to stay
To be stuck in an endless void
Where warmth is a stranger and coldness a neighbor
To dance with the monsters that dwell in your head
And comfort the ones that live under your bed
A forbidden art with sweet release
To tangle with your own desires
The darkness brings something the light cannot
Courage, anxiety, strength
A candle provides a dim path
The heat from the fire burns
Reminding you of how alive you are
How blissfully free
And how utterly alone

This love began to dim,
Due to the quiver of your chin.

The desire to fulfill,
No longer brings me thrill.

Your hopes and all your dreams,
Instilled inside of me.

Our love could not commit,
We fell into derailment.

Longing glances turned to disapproving sighs.
Dishonesty shining through your weak despondent eyes.

Our legs intertwine,
Fear pulsing at the base of my spine.
  
To stay with you,
There’s no escape.

From what you think,
And what you take.

This love caught fire,
I burned you down.

Dying to be touched,
Craving to be found.

I didn’t ask for this.
I didn’t ask for you.

This love once so good,
Became untrue.