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I will always look up to you,
And admire you,
Just as I do
The magnificent stars
In the magical night sky.

~ Always.

By Lady R.F. (C)2018
 Dec 2017 Zero Nine
 Dec 2017 Zero Nine
I saw her sitting quite
In a gown color white
The skin looked pale
Her efforts seemed fail
The moving chair stuck
She became restless
Pained and helpless
The wheels didn't move
Help was needed as prove
I walked over to help her
She had tears, I noticed from far
I got her wheelchair on track
The wheels got stuck in a crack
She became happy with joy
And hugged me thanking
Gave me her favorite toy
It so happened I was on roam
This old lady, in the resting home
Was left by her kids, heart of stone
To deal with her life all alone...

I am glad, I am with my mum who is a stroke paitent with complications like seizures and Alzheimer's. I never let her out of my sight. I love her same but my heart broke when I saw how this lady was treated.
 Dec 2017 Zero Nine
I can hear the wolfs

Screaming in my ear
Breathing on my neck
Smelling all my fear

I can hear the wolfs

Patiently waiting for the attack
Shivers felt at my back

When will they attack?
Looking back there are many mistakes
Should I have looked away?
Should I have shut up?

Should I have faked it
Should I have tried harder
Now I sit here
No purpose

Rain hits the glass
The glass casing of my soul
As it begs for me to stop
To turn off the light

Maybe I'll turn it off soon
 Dec 2017 Zero Nine
The Dybbuk
It won't stop bleeding,
This gaping red and black hole.
Useless bandages.
 Dec 2017 Zero Nine
a different sort of nerves
run up and down my spine
this is new, this is taking
breath and spitting out
a lie, chewing on the
tacky bits of life yet
still forgetting you
will die;
because death falls
through the walls
and takes us even
if we cry,
if we lie;
death is deaf to
tacky pleas and
pulls our breath out of
the lungs
beneath our spines.
when I feel like
you’re here with me
and that you will be, it
in some odd way star form
gives me this focus and clarity
to face the world that I never have
like hardly, ever, shrinking away into
this no one knows no one gets place
where I hang out and nod my head
at the rest who I don’t know how
they can’t see I’m pretending
this whole scheme is OK
but somehow it’s all
so much better
when I think
you’re with me
even just
in my head
you go closer
than anyone has
on physical planes
and I feel like my chest
gets less heavy and I can
breathe deep and not think
about my regular plagues
and it all seems so doable
like I can play the game
in order to get out of it
like I can be a better
when I think we are OK
it’s dumb in a way but I swear
when I think you are mad at me
or don’t understand me or
confuse where I’m at
it’s like my own limb
giving me the finger
filing papers to sever
it feels so lost awkward
and I’m like, ahem, get over here
stop being silly
we don’t always have choices
as to what feels like home
because if we did
we’d have been there long before
we stumbled into it, my dear
at the first cozy thing, as if
one could stick a welcome mat at
another’s feet and make it feel right
we surely would have before now
but I won’t forget
and I won’t let you
forget who
the **** I am
namely, you
 Nov 2017 Zero Nine
 Nov 2017 Zero Nine
Drunk state
Sober mind
Twisted tongue
Honest words

Stumbling and rambling
Unfiltered sentences
Stuttering mess
Confessions of true emotions

How I love the drunk state
It's just me and my honesty
My lips taking in liquids
My lips spitting out true feelings

There's no don'ts
There's no what ifs
There's no hesitations
There's no taking back

There's no limit
On what should I say
On what can I say
On what I must say

I just wanna be drunk
Drunk to say things
Drunk to tell you this
Drunk till I fell asleep
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