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As a person I know
You're usually awkward
And most likely weird
But when you turn serious
My impression of you turns different
I've never seen anyone like you
I never thought you had this side of you
But seeing you like this is foreign to me
I've  become attached to you somehow
And I can't seem to put much into words what I think about you for real
You have your way with words
That I get distracted
No matter what time it is
I come to think of you
I try to not think of you
But you just come up and show your face
How can I ignore you
When you're such a beautiful soul
If you knew me entirely, you wouldn't love me anymore
I

And, like a dying lady lean and pale,
Who totters forth, wrapp’d in a gauzy veil,
Out of her chamber, led by the insane
And feeble wanderings of her fading brain,
The mood arose up in the murky east,
A white and shapeless mass.

II

    Art thou pale for weariness
Of climbing heaven and gazing on the earth,
    Wandering companionless
Among the stars that have a different birth,
And ever changing, like a joyless eye
That finds no object worth its constancy?
I don't know what to do when I'm in front of you
I tend to get nervous about your every move
I don't mean to be so tense
Just want to know what must be done
My heart shakes because of you

I try to act different when you're around
I don't want you to hate me
I really like you
How can you shake up my heart furiously?
Sometimes, I just have the urge to curse at you.
But I just can't say it .
Obviously, I'm scared of being scolded.
But I really want to hit you with a truck
And say "goodbye"  forever to you.
But it's not that simple.
Especially that you're close to me.
...for a friend.
The old man who worked at the grocery store,
Stopped talking to me.
He said I wasn't like him
and I never would be.

The lady who shopped at my dad's store,
stopped coming.
She said she was afraid of
Who she was becoming.

Dad and I agreed,
Blind obedience was to be.
People doing as they're told.
Afraid to act brazen and bold.

Speaking up or acting out,
was something people didn't do,
simply a sense of doubt.

But at what point do we stop following,
lead our own?
To do what's right,
Even it if it means to
Stand alone.

Father said the war would soon end,
But days went by,
and it would only extend.

All of the farmers, grocers, and school teachers,
Continued on their day,
Ignoring the torture, put on display.

Father went to the right
and I went to the left.
Tears fell,
But he wished me the best.
I'm hers, undeniably,
But I'm afraid to make her mine.
I'm too comfortable by myself
So I fail to give her time.
A better man will make her his,
Then I'll rightly be left behind.
...
All because I'm an introvert
And a coward combined.
She's amazing but I spend too much time with myself.
I'm afraid she'll find out
If she gets too close
That my breathing is ragged,
That I'm both sweaty and cold,
That my heart is beating furiously,
That she matters more than she knows.
...
That her mere presence affects me,
And it's not something I can control.
I remember how she hugged me and how scared I was.
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