Do you remember that time when you walked through the rain to my house, just for me to beg you to stay; even though in the end you shouted before leaving, "I love you, but ******* anyways"? I remember the feeling of that night. This sense of loss and dread, a heaviness in your words that left me paralyzed.

Do you remember that time I found you on the ground just outside my house, screaming for you to stay; even though I already knew what had to be done was finished. I remember the smell of that night. This scent of earth and decomposition, the weight of your favourite perfume that left me blinded.

Now every time I smell the scent of 'Blue Citrus' perfume and hear the words 'I love you' I can't help but think that I'm cursed forever to see you next to me. I remember that time when you spoke words of winds and paper cranes, but now you speak words of silence ad snake bites.

This is for all the run on sentences you wrote to me late at night and all the times you left me begging for you to stay.

Gravitational forces
towards something better
as if it exists
buried beneath
some distant desert

what is it
that strains to convey
itself
in this broken poetry
as if truth were at
the tip of its tongue

perhaps it's to feel real
for only a moment
to escape the routine
of making a living
which only yields
a skeleton
compacted in dirt

Take my writing
let it fly upon the wind
let it touch the four corners
of Earth's spiritless surface
Take it farther!
upon the wings of doves
and sound waves of conversation
to red and gaseous planets
let even the martian men
attempt to
translate

Standing there waiting
Thinking that time is wasting
This is the shot that I’ve bought
The rope is taut, tied in a knot
This is all I got
Say goodbye to my plot

Standing there caught
Thinking that time is rot
Blazing gunshot
The room fills with fraught
Firing like a snapshot

Standing there in a time slot
Thinking that this is all for not
There’s a shot
Fired from a hand so hot
Brought by an abstract thought
Death as its mascot

More often than not
I need freedom from thought
But this is my shot
And I’m not done until I’ve fought

I know you loved road trips
Always taking the longer route
Though it did bring a smile to your lips

And cold weather
In which you loved to wear
Navy blue sweaters

You loved 13th century royalty
With their rubies and pearls
And their eggshell loyalty

I know you loved your mother
And I know you loved mine
But did you ever wish I had a brother?

I know you loved books and milk tea
You loved so many things
And I'm sure you even loved me

The last thing on my mind
Would be
The last thing on my mind
I think about what that will be
But only time to time

For I find that when the
Day is done
When the children count sheep
And the race is run

When King Sun goes to sleep
And Queen Moon presides
Asleep in bed
With my love
At my side

That is when I hope I will die

when people are in love
they often say
they simply fell
tripped over their own two feet
face forward
and into the arms of their beloved

i did more than simply fall
onto the ground of your love

you, for me
were an ocean
and i dived
headfirst
roughly
harshly
almost painfully
into the waters of “you”

i knew i could not swim
but i did so anyway
i was drowning
entangled in you
surrounded by this being of “you”
engulfed in this feeling of “you”

and i did not know what came over me
but i let myself drown
i did not try to swim back up
because if i went back to land,
releasing myself from your grasp
that would mean losing the feeling of “you”

and after
submerging into the depth
the love
the passion
of “you”

how could i ever leave?

I could clip the wings of angels.
           but still they would think
that heaven was a place to step upon.

When every god is deceased,
            and fact becomes reality .
                      Some still grasp at straws.

*"We are awoken no longer slumbering  in denial,