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on a sea strand,
have you watched empty shells
mercilessly tossed from sea to shore
and from shore to sea?
      
often I shrink and reduce to such a shell,
with jagged and broken edges
colorless and empty

among many a debris cast on the shore,
i lie half buried under the sand
waiting for some mighty wave
to wash me away
all the way to the sea

how tedious is my voyage
shuttling from him to her
and from her to him
unable to openly confess
who weighs more
on the balance of preference

through how many alleys and by ways
I have wandered, questioning my identity!
am I a puffer fish, being toxic
the fisher men have discarded?
a jarring note in a discordant symphony?
I wonder....! I often ask myself!

destined to grow
in mercurial climes,
planted in arid shallow soil
with the tap root trimmed,
branches pruned,
growth denied,
I, a stunted bonsai!

still I dream to be a towering tree,
that in profusion gives fruits and shade!
a ****** aspiring to be a Goliath
a hollow reed,
longing at once to be the singer and the song!
When a divorce occurs, the threat of losing the home and losing the purpose of life confronts a child, especially in the younger age. Children of divorced parents experience a real trauma and they begin to doubt about their own identity!
I would've given birth
To you,
Endured whatever
Mothers do.
Instead, I did
What Dads do.

I rocked you
Til my future shook;
Watched you til
I couldn't look.
As you changed,
I changed too,
To do the things
That Dads do.

You were bathed,
Dressed and fed;
I loved you so much
I was saved.

If there's credit,
Well, I get it,
For teaching you to read.
I took the blame
When you got bored
With school's ABC's.

I followed you
In all your roles,
Your teams,
Your solos,
Your trips,
Your shows.
First to clap,
Last to sit;
I taped it all,
From start -
To finish.

I taught you
How to tie a lace,
Ride a bike,
Golf and skate.
When time arrived
For you to drive,
You learned
On standard,
Never stranded,
You came home alive.

Your highs
I took in stride,
By example taught
Humility's pride.
Your lows,
I couldn't internalize,
I dropped my guard
With my eyes.

When Dad's do well
It's a double edge,
The future wedge.
The world
Revealed
Desired you too.
I don't dismiss
What mothers do,
But when Dads do well,
Both lose you.
Repost: Happy Father's Day, Dads everywhere.
It’ll come back to you
They keep telling me
But they don’t get it,
The way darkness creeps inside of my mind,
The way it makes my insides tremble so loudly-
My body’s natural response begins to follow suit,
My leg brushes against the corner of my desk
Just enough to be irritating;
Momentarily distracting me from the object of my attention
I stare at the same blank notebook in front of me
Until the lines begin to blur into one single color;
Hypnotizing me in an almost unbreakable trance
I can’t remember when I started losing myself,
Losing the things,
I thought once defined me
But somewhere…
Embedded beneath the buzzing distractions
My mind taunts me with,
Is one simple word etched into the center of it all
It’s been so long since anyone’s called me it-
A ‘writer’ that is,
My fingertips no longer remember the familiar smoothness
Of my favorite pencil,
My mind has gone dark,
My thoughts only continue to grow louder
Everything inside of me has vanished
Completely submerged into the darkness,
Covered in a sticky grotesque black
That stains everything it touches
I can’t see inside myself anymore
My fingertips don’t dare write a word
Of the war going on inside of my mind
Maybe, some things are better left unfound
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You've done it a hundred times before
But just when you thought the day would come
When you'd lose track of time
You'd forget when it was
And you wouldn't have to count anymore
You thought you were free of it
You'd made it far enough
You thought you'd gone long enough
You thought it was over....

You fall right back to zero.
If you are a suicide survivor
Inbox me your name
And I’ll add it to my tattoos of others

You guys mean the world to me
And I have my own name on my arm
Because I too, am a suicide survivor.
Inbox me your name. Make this go viral so I get names. Hopefully it inspires someone to fight a little harder. Anyone wanna join me?

If you understand I’m sorry. Stay strong friend.
 May 2018 Megha Sreevarprade
Ash
Depression reaved my friends
Coaxing them with her motherly apparition
Nurturing  their tears by plundering their motivation
Depression deceived my friends
Singing a sweet lullaby of anxiety and isolation
Cradling their meager hearts in her lonely hands
Depression was once my friend
But I cast-off her beguiling, love-robbing sham
Many of my friends have been victims of depression, and I tried to rescue them, but unfortunately I wasn't enough to help them. I rejoice that they've gotten better, but at the same time their health has left me lonely because when they abandoned depression, they also abandoned me. I'm happy and strong now, but it's still sad reminiscing sometimes <3
I could never tell you
exactly what's going on inside my head,
so I'll write instead.
Drown my thoughts in paper & lead.
Keep my hands alive,
and my expression dead.
I may seem open
vulnerable
like a flower
petals upon petals
shroud a tight furled core
deep within
sheltered, snowed in, slumbering
I have yet to bloom
Or
Rather
Nothing is meant to.
I'll work with you
To make forever
A
Truth.
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