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Denxai Mcmillon Sep 2022
I was awoken by the sound of song
Time adrift spent to long
I couldn't see although I searched
For the space your voice was perched
A voice so strong a stiffened breeze
That fell to silence with a subtle ease
I listened hard to try and hold
The voice that let these words unfold
Denxai Mcmillon Aug 2022
Give my father back.
The man I never got to meet
The man before ptsd
The man before deployment
Give me the father that raised my youngest sister
Give me the father I never had

Give me back my brother
The man who walked hours in flipflops
The man before the triggers
The man before basic training
Give me the brother who was full of mobility
Give me the brother I was raised beside

You can have my ******* freedom
If I can have them back
You can have my ******* freedom
Denxai Mcmillon Aug 2022
Mask of mine
Shadow at my feet
Ghost of the public
Poltergeist of a person
Disconnect from me
Separate yourself from my body
Liberate my soul
Let me be
Denxai Mcmillon Aug 2022
It's been a while,
Hello, Wesley,
I'm Denxai.
I'm you,
A very much changed you
There's been, well, developments.
You've grown.
You've grown a lot.
So, much so,
That you may not recognize yourself
You're Pansexual,
You're non-binary
You're not, alone anymore
At times you're gonna feel that way
You're very likely autistic
You'll be very happy to hear that
I'm really glad you where there
Without you, well there would be no us
I really appreciate you
I don't respect a lot of what you did to survive
But I'm glad you did it
You're happy
Chasing joy
You wake up eary to listen to the birds
you enjoy your job
You're comfortable wit your body.
Well, most of the time
I love you.
I, *******, love you
So please.
Enjoy your rest.
This is an ongoing project exploring the depths of my mind written in the frame of 6 minutes to the song "All children make mistakes" by Pianos become the teeth
Denxai Mcmillon Aug 2022
Intersection of me
Who I am
Who I want to be
Who I can connect
Parts of my heart
Speaking truth of who made me
A poem of weakness
I'm naked when i bring together the parts of my heart
It's who made me
I'm not an individual of particular courage
So, when you meet
Pieces of me
Pieces of me
Come together like polar opposites
Come together like magnets
with ease
for me
come together
I can't do this alone
I need you to meet
So, if it's not in the middle
So, if it's not half way
You'll tear me apart
Come together
For me
Denxai Mcmillon Aug 2022
I didn’t want to see you like this,
A bullet at the back of a barrel
Pointed right at me.
Is it because
You're, too, **** proud
To take that gun
And turn it back around.
So, over this now
Lukewarm coffee
I’ll feed you kindness
To mellow you out,
If that kills me
I’ll know you’ll still be bitter
but at least you'll still be around.
I’ll feed you kindness
And if it kills me,
I’ll know that
You’ll still be around
It took me too many now long spent years to grasp this lesson.
So, now I’ll teach you
That when you swallow pride
You radiate joy
To those you’ll leave behind
So follow me
Behind your teeth
Past that lump in your throat
Over those forgotten needs
Let’s slip beyond this
Beyond this together
Through this perilous journey
Please remember
That I’ll be there
that I’ll be there
I will be there
Let’s radiate heat
Like the sun in the spring
Let’s radiate heat
Just to make that dead green.
Let’s radiate heat
Let’s radiate heat
Let’s radiate heat
A joyous dream.
A letter to myself at nineteen from a much softer me at twenty-seven
Denxai Mcmillon Aug 2022
Walking quick I pay no mind
Although your path I'd quickly find
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