i'm in love, but not in "love"

I see it from my very soul
I see a love that has been there for years
your love for me has proven to be my greatest possession
a gift surpassing all things imagined

Brian Hill - 2020 # 128
For Leslie, my greatest inspiration and love 💕

Sometimes I breathe through my words
Sometimes I bleed through my words

I had a dream about you
last night.
you died.
in the dream,
I missed you.
I cried for you.
but I don't miss you
in my life.

I wonder
how you are.
but I don't wonder
what we might have been.

like water
I poured myself into her until she was overflowing at the brim

like reinforced steel
I bridged my heart to hers and welded myself to her soul

like the sun
I filled myself with light to cover her darkness

like a blanket
I shielded her from the harsh world underneath the covers

like magnets
I orbited her aura until we inevitably collided

like a seed
I felt myself growing up from her

Then, like an idiot
I could tell she felt nothing.

Tik tok ... tik tok
Take a glimpse at the clock
It is turning eight
We can't wait
For the story in the book

Tik tok .... tik tok
Clean up toys like a rock
put this here
Put this there
Clean up the room everywhere

Tik tok ... tik tok
Bath time with some soap
Wash your hand
Wash your leg
Wash the day off your neck

Tik tok ... tik tok
Bed is warm and so soft
Close your eyes
Dream so nice
Tomorrow comes shine and rise

After you
I don't want to open up anymore.
I told you everything
Because I could
You seem like the only one to stay

You knew me the most
But yet you did the worst thing
You could do to me.

Sister,
You are like
The magnificent
Moon

When you feel
Your power waning
Know it will be restored
To it’s fullness soon...