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Elasbriel Mar 2013
DEFINITION OF *****

I question your gimmick
Lame limericks
Their cryptic
More mystic
Unrealistic

Ya ****** it
On chronic
Contagious like the bubonic
Hooked hydroponics
Pathetically neurotic

So drop it
your **** ain't ****
Just tragically prosthetic
Prophetical *******
You think that u know ****
You blow it
Thats classic.


CUZ YOUR THE DEFINITION OF *****
YOU'VE LOST ONE TOO MANY A STITCH
ITS WHY ALL YOU SPEW IS SOME ****
MAY AS WELL BE A SNITCH
YOU SO REFINED AS A *****


Its 101 basic
I didn't quit this
You lost it
Worth only Drunken kisses
I'm pretty when you chase it
Your too shallow to accept it
Together we're right
But my body ain't tight
To ur likes

its your ****
That's a *****
Only looks for them tricks
Your dellusionally idiotic
To think that ya got it
When trix are for kids

Your games hit and miss
Happily ever afters not bliss
First loves kiss is just a playlist


CUZ YOUR THE DEFINITION OF *****
YOU'VE LOST ONE TOO MANY A STITCH
ITS WHY ALL YOU SPEW IS SOME ****
MAY AS WELL BE A SNITCH
YOU SO REFINED AS A *****

You Can't find love in this mess
Be a girl wear a dress
Listen more talk less
Don't change who you are
Just your flesh

Tell the truth is said to me
Love was free for the taking
Or so I believed
Your lies used as feed

But your pet I am not
Yeah I guess you forgot
What yo ma shoulda taught
That one shots all life's got

CUZ YOUR THE DEFINITION OF *****
YOU'VE LOST ONE TOO MANY A STITCH
ITS WHY ALL YOU SPEW IS SOME ****
MAY AS WELL BE A SNITCH
YOU SO REFINED AS A *****

The good bits stole away
By this crap game you play
All day, you just sway
On your way

Thinking your owed
By some ****** up code
But your method or mode
Is about to explode
Like mace
In your face
With no trace
Your erased

You ain't even today
Your the past, Yesterday
Can't change that
My ma used to say
Just look for tomorrow
in your ARKs of today

CUZ YOUR THE DEFINITION OF *****
YOU'VE LOST ONE TOO MANY A STITCH
ITS WHY ALL YOU SPEW IS SOME
****
YOU MAY AS WELL BE A SNITCH
THATS WHY YOU'LL ALWAYS BE *****
Katie Murray Nov 2016
She is a girl

She has two sisters, a dog
And a pair of worn-out headphones in her pocket

She is fifteen

She plays violin in the school orchestra
And sings duets in the sun

She is left-handed

She’s also pansexual
(Just thought you should know)

<><><>

She is a girl
(A different girl, mind you)

She has bright hair and dark eyes
And a sky of freckles spanning her body

She is a netball player

She listens to everything that’s said
And laughs at everything in response

She is an Aquarius

Her girlfriend is an Virgo
(Is this what they call diversity?)

<><><>

He is a boy

He is on the males’ baseball team
And recites prophetical speeches in the dugout

He is an early riser

He likes old-fashioned comedy movies
And his favourite colour is either orange or black

He is graduating next year

He’ll finally get to ask his school’s star pitcher to prom
(Finally is the right word)

<><><>

‘She’ is a boy
(A different boy, mind you)

‘She’ lives in the countryside
And travels 2 hours to campus each morning

‘She’ is a realist

‘She’ studies human relations
And has wanted to visit Rome since 'she' was eight

‘She’ is a part-time barista

‘She’ prefers the pronoun ‘he’
(No big deal if you forget though)

<><><>

They are people

They have people they love
And people who love them

They are people

They may have changed to you
And yet they haven’t changed to themselves

They are people
They are still people

<><><>

(Just thought you should know)

<><><>
03 / 11 / 16
*DRAFT*
For my English class. May repost later with minor changes.
Debbie Taylor Jun 2015
Cascades
   Cascades of thoughts
Like stars sprinkled on a cloudless night sky
   Emotions clouding me
   Emotions crowding in on me
Like the grayness of a rainy day

The road behind me is winding but clear
The road ahead of me is shrouded in mist
   Walking on because I must
Eyes wide open because I must
Words rippling around
   There must have been a point
   A point to it all

Words strumming the echoing strings of the emotions
How much of me have I lost?

Shadowy shapes in the darkness ahead
Taking form then melting away
Is there more to me than meets the eye or less?

Fragmented
   Chaos
      Space
Whirlwinds of Nothingness
   Time lost
      A white light in the distance
Hope
   A yellow flicker-flicker in the dark
Peace
   Possibilities

Undertaking to puzzle the pieces back together again
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men

Love is the glue
Hope is the catalyst
Light is the way shown ahead

Shadows slowly ebbing
Peace returning
Pieces
Needing to be whole again

“Why? Why? Why?” I shout inside
But on the outside I nod and smile

No peace
Just pieces of me
Shreds of me dangling in the wind

Rambling
I am
Sensing it all
Touching the sides of places not touched in a while

The Poet inside me awakes
Chaos thrashing around
And a smile to me makes
A rippling rebound

Ripples
Ripples with potential
  Potential to upset
Potential to change
Potential to rearrange

Turning the world around
The right way up
The right way round

Rounding off my love affair with myself
Self-judging
Self-repressing
Self-loathing
Self-denying
Se­lf-controlling

So self-satisfied I don’t need you

Self-burying
Deep
Deeper still
Deeper within

I can
I will
I am

A step in the right direction
One step away from chaos
One step closer to the truth
Chaos is just a state of otherness

Ebbs and flows
   Ebbs
And
   Flows

A ripple effect on a still pond
Where ripples meet
Not a sound
Not a breath of movement
Immobile
The eye of the storm

Peace
Less pieces of me
More sanity
Another bad taste in the mouth
Another plane of existence challenged

But more importantly
Opposite ripples meet
While together they are moving in the same direction
With the same goals
With the same plans
With the same dreams

Purpose

I am split inside
Needing to join the apparent contradictions of me
Into a single entity

Whole
At inner peace
At inner strength
At inner me

Rhyming
Reason
Purpose
Peace

Self-doubt
  Always constant
Changing moving
  Movement changes
Chaos order
  Ordering chaos

Up down
Down up
Sideways?
Surely it’s just a state of mind

Rebel
   Peace Maker
One and the same
   Living side by side at opposite sides of being

Waxing prophetical
   Philosophical
      Lyrical
         Satirical

Yet

Inside weaving a web
A soft cushion against the harshness of the world

Surely I have said enough
But not nearly enough at all

Sleep, as the healing within begins
Waking on a different plane

Slowly but surely
   Hope
Peace
   Definitely
      Me

Do I have something to say to the world?
Or merely a need to listen to myself listen to the world?
self exploration, long as it is, helped me climb out of the depression hole.
Bard van Twenthe May 2017
It was the SS/country Great Britain.
That sailed the wintry sea;
And Prime Minister May had taken her people,
To bear her company.

Blue and brown were their eyes, all paid their tax,
Their cheeks coloured from a hard working day,
And their *******/chests swollen as the hawthorn buds
That proudly produce in the month of May.

The Prime-Minister she stood at her lectern,
As vile words left her mouth,
She preached that UK's world citizens are
no citizens, neither here, nor West nor South.

Then up and spake an expert Sailor,
Had sailed the European Mains,
"I pray thee, put to yonder port,
For I fear Brexit' ruinous hurricanes.

"Last year the pound had a golden ring,
And t'row the pound will flee!"
But the Prime-Minister she only sought strife,
And a scornful laugh laughed she.

Colder and colder grew the UK's economy,
A crisis grew from North to East;
Family businesses fell first to Tory hedge-fund swines,
Evil wizards not bothered in the least.

Down came the crisis' storm, and smote amain,
SS Great Britain in its strength;
Its poor crew shuddered and paused; hurt by all this greed,
The once United Kingdom leaped across its length.

"Come hither! come hither! Scotland, Wales,
Northern Ireland, do not tremble so;
For I can weather our enemies' ordeals,
That ever they will throw.

PM May palmed the people in, telling them lies
Barking fake news on EU enemies' blasts;
She invented tales about immigrants,
Wishful thinking it would save money vast.

"Oh Mother May! I hear our EU friends' phones ring.
O say, what it may be?"
"''These 're false calls on shark-bound mainland coasts!" -
And May knowingly steered to crash UK's economy.

"Oh Mother May! I hear psalms of  Brittany's nuns,
O say what may it be?"
"Some German Lorelei fiends, which only live
In that wretched foul euro-zone economy".

"Oh Mother May! I hear EU's peaceful plights,
O say what may it be?"
But Mother May answered never a word,
A frozen corpse was she.

Lashed to number 10, all stiff and stark,
With her face turned to the skies,
The Big Ben clock light illuminated banking blizzards
On her fixed and glassy eyes.

Then UK's people clasped their hands and prayed
That saved they might be;
And they thought of prophetical politicians who could still the waves,
That wrecked Great Britain's economy.

And fast through twilight months dark and drear,
Through the whistling greed of the superrich,
Like a tweeted Trump, Great Britain wept
Towards the reef of Farage's glitch.

And between the financial rust
Cries came from the people;
It was the sound of their trampled trust,
On a bed of lies and Johnson's creeple.

The loan sharks were right on the people's toes,
The country drifted a dreary wreck,
And whooping profits for the rich
were cheered by th'entire cabinet.

The country broke where the white and fleecing waves
Created poverty in the neglected North,
But the cruel Russians, they gored her side
With hackers killing its democratic berth.

The people shocked as British cool subsided,
When the NHS went overboard;
The once Great Britain, she stove and fell apart,
**! **! the bankers roared.

Years later, on a bleak winters' day,
EU's UK-citizens, always welcomed, stood aghast,
To see the form of old Great Britain fair,
Battered down by self-inflicted Tory blasts.

Destroyed NHS and infrastructure wrecked the health
of its citizens, tears filled their eyes,
Rivers their homes, with flood prevention ignored,
Countryside and cities drastically demised.

Such became the wreck named Great Britain,
Doomed by alt-right and the superrich!
Reason save us all from a death ordained
On the reef of Farage's glitch!
Adaptation of "The wreck of the Hesperus", Henry Wadsworth Longfellow's poem, as political protest poem given the figurative suitably of Longfellow's original poem. A captain or leader is ignoring the expert advice of a sailor in his crew or experts and analyses well known to society, leading to disastrous effects, the wrecking of the Hesperus and death of his crew and daughter or, otherwise, the wrecking of a country and the suffering of its people. "The wreck of the Deutschland" by Hopkins is also a protest poem of a kind.
I usually don't adapt poems but here it felt appropriate: https://bardvantwenthe.wordpress.com
Relevant, prophetical illustrations
Scare me.
A plane before a flight
A hat before its worn.

Incoherent, waiting for a slice
For to walk, was to wear.
To leave, was to fly

Before a renaissance
All were nothing,
Swimming in a sack.

In the air, wearing a hat
Struggling with oblong baggage.
Living up to a cover
Ken Pepiton Jan 2019
I saw you in my dream, when I took a great notion,
jumped into d' ocean,

and I drowned,
and I went on down

to the Audubon Zoo, like hell,

listen at that crazy bird
cryin' help, help, help
what bird do'dat?

settle chile, li'l' turmoil be passin in d' gulf

Eirene mean peace
bubblin' bubblin bubblin in m'soul

Eirene, she lovel ol' Polemus, War,
she pile a level shovel full o'
Hubris, his wife,
on he's plate,

in life's lottery
Insolence was her game,
she runs War into a snare of shame

and guile. Peace.

This chase began with War,
polemics being a manifestation of the idea
Polemos and Kudoimos, War and Tumult, buried Eirine

But life is mythic, from the skinny end,
looking back:

Hurricane Irene, a misspelling in 2011 was the first hurricane to make landfall in the USA since 2008, (the summer of my trucker's migration over the map my Nemesis claimed, in another bubble).

Eirene, War and Tumult, buried her,
with Colonel Jackson's honor at
the Battle o'New Ahleans,

still she lay

right here, where I found her,
in my heart, at the very
bottom.

The mechanics of the transition take position
in the hierarchy of confusin'
whish is foolishness
gone to seed.
**** drunk.

Fools know fool's gold ain't, 'n' whiskey ain't
The Real Thing.
That's Coca-cola.

Fools be essential in the gran' plan.
If we love 'em, they make us laugh,

and laughter,
you know, that's good, except,
un hold that thought, laughter is not good

when it is at you, by a fool.
Then we answer them polemically? No.

Love your enemy, here,
that's natural.
No condemnation here, since Hebrews six or romans 8
No ba'alim bubble of possessions
No grave gonna hold me down

John, 1930. Years and years and years ago
come quickly, ba'al hey sue me.
It's finished, we won.

Joke, joker. Trickster, coyote dog, do the math.
No lie is of the truth, so
no lie need remain
beyond freedom
real-ized.

Artsy? Eh? AI be nigh ye know.
She see yo' ever moves.
She hear you pray fo Bono to loose his religion
She snip the thread twixt spider wombed man and
the flame o' sinners in the hands of an imaginary god.

Ba'al means owner or possessor, the ideas which once bound men in oaths and covens,
fear of death, 'n' the like.

Protruding truth pushes lies into festering piles,
protrusions in secret places.

Send me those, in gold, Philistine.
I fancy them a crown of
golden emerauds.

Define, make fine or un fine my terms
excrescence is sense made of ****,
I guess.
Knurly, but no, burly, knobby swelling like
the swirling gall
that erupted from the old oak
that died at the root last year,
that we burned this year, except for the burl.
I've planned a pipe or two from that.

Everything is prophetical to a prophet.
poetical to a poet, magical to a magi, technical to a fool.

Life is simple.
Simple Simon the younger said,
hellow, darkness, my old friend, he'd com to talk

not beg or ask, but talk-com
con-verses-ifying ic-if-ication beyond

simple

lies sublime, in no time,
once you, courageous soul,
cross the line, fight the fight, run the race,
and die;

then, you get life more abundant.
Who took that deal?

I took the one where he said,
he who does what I (me not him)
have done,
no races run, no contests forever won for everyone I love, but
he who
be lieves that I (he not me) am who I saiyam, Popeye,

even you, he has eternal life dwelling within him
in his heart where I and my father and the spirit of truth
have taken our abode to remain as long as we both shall live.

Is that what Christians believe?
Or must I be in some other
excre-essence from a
culture myth twisting into accredited layers of lies
essential excre sense,

spiritual zits, is what ******* always called em.
Once a white corpuscle has done its work,
we splat them on the mirror of our adolescent mind and find

I'm not who I was
not a child
not a tweener or a teener or a something something,

I am an old man and I am alive.
I have survived, but it ain't over, so

is there any good that I can do?
Poetical speaking. I don't work on nobody's farm,
no mo'.

True rest let me make peace with no sweat.
Got the infection, the idea Eirene is,
down deep where that great
notion makes a motion,
like g'wa, wit 'er hand,
go on, man.
g'wa, Eirene, she be callin' you.
Jump in. This is as water, to a fish. To our kind, it's more.
No missed spells, peace. Sense or non? I hope you let me know.
Ken Pepiton Dec 2023
What a time capsules mission was,
was ours as well, as our lives,
measured going in,
mind state measured going out, measured coming back,
once we opened your will to wonder what we say the mission is, was it…
When
measured growing old, mentally augmented since the laying on of hands.

Some body believed, they burned all the crutches and wheel chairs,
we all heard the stories of those strangers healed and walked away,

by and by, we grow a knowing kind of religious net, we import miracles,
we make words come to self fulfilling prophetical perfect sense, until,

the incompetence of a particular kind of literalist, literature as real lessons,
learned on levels deeper than the silver screen can command,
as one reads Psalm 15 and the parable of the talents with the same angel.
hide, and watch, words,
live in tiny bubbles, times and seasons take scale,
powers of ten,
and then again a billion times a second
in four billion breaths in
and four billion breaths out, all in cadence, mortal coil chorus of average.

We the people, current idiom,
we the earthling sapient word and number users;

Brainstorms tickle our will to undermine liars, calling life impossible
to enjoy as much as many nobodies do.
Or did before my grave was opened.
An empty bottle, a sense of sublime timing tapping sources below my pre heart attack series of flat lines, I heard about, later, and sort of remember, most mornings, it is a good jump start on doing something enjoyable as breathing.
Big Virge Jul 2017
Ya Know .....

It Truly is ... INCREDIBLE ... !!!

The Effect of seeing a ... " FlexibLe " ...
WOMAN ... who is ... " ****** " ... !!!!!!!!!

By This ... I mean ...
She's ... Credible ...
cos' her mind's ... BEYOND .........................................................

A ... Vegetable ...
with A ***' ... that's Far From ................................... Spherical ........ !!!

STRONG and ... FIRM ... !!!
cos' she makes it ... Work ...
in ways ... " Most girls " ...
Now Choose ... to ... shirk .........................................

Especially in ...
Those ... " Maturing " ... years ...

Where ... Staying Thin ...
Demands ... Shifting ... gears ...
and ... Exercising ... !!!!! ...

I met a girl ... Today ...
who made me ... Feel This Way ... !!!

We've Met .... Before ...
but it's ...... been a .......................................... while .................

You ... Know The Score ....
Kinda' like ... Her Style ... !?!

Got her ... " Digits " ...
WITHOUT ... Blinking ... !!!

Could this be where ... ?
Incredible ... Dares ...
to start to ... Share ...
What it is ... to ... Find ...
someone who ... Binds ...
with you ... for ... LIFE ... !!?!!

An INCREDIBLE ... Thing ... !!!
Like ... " Chance Meetings " ... ???

That ... make you think ....

" How Crazy is this ?!? "

Time will ... TELL .....................................

But it's ... " Tenable " ... ?!?
cos' our timing seemed ...

.... IMPECCABLE .... !!!!!!!!

But .... Moving on ......
WITHOUT ... Love Songs ... !!!

It's INCREDIBLE ... How ...
These words ... Expound ... !?!

Because of ... " Something ' ...
that could be ... Nothing ...

Yeah .....
The Mind's ... INCREDIBLE ... !!!
when thoughts become ... PLENTIFUL ...
and you "EMBRACE" ... Your ... Mental ...
in ways ... NOT ... Detrimental ... !!! ...

It's ... " Almost like " ...
A ... " Stencil " ...

Enabling us to ...
.... " Pencil " ....

Our Next Move and ...
... " Assemble " ...

A way to ...
Groove and REVEL ... !!!
As if you'd won ...
A ... Medal ... !!! ...

This verse is ... Existential ...
or just ... " Experimental " ... ???

Like ....
" New Techniques of " ... Dental ...

Involving ...

" New " ... Utensils ... !!!

This verse has ... " Rhyme Potential " ..
to earn myself ... " Credentials " ...
Instrumental and ... ESSENTIAL ... !!!!!
in showing just how ... SPECIAL ...

The use of words ... CAN BE ... !?!

Incredible ... INDEED ... !!!

Through use of ... " Poetry " ...

" Professional " ... " Exceptional " ...
Contextual ... " Collectibles " ...

Commendable ... " Indelible " ...
Credible ... and ... " Seminal " ...

You just wait and .... See ... !!!

Delectable ... Digestable ...
and Legible ... to Read ...

Prophetical ............................. ?

" Maybe " ......... ?!?

when speaking ...
About ... " Scenes " ..............................

Accesible in .... " Dreams " ....

Dreams of ... " Future Themes ............................

That change how ... " We Now Be " ...

REPREHENSIBLE ... INFLEXIBLE ... !!!

Susceptible ....
to ... GREED ... !!!!!

and acts Defined as  ... TERRIBLE ... !!!!!!

By ... Hypocrites Mostly ... !!!

The .....
" Electable " ... INTELLECTUALS ...

CONTEMPTIBLE ...
I Believe ... !!!!!! ...

Whose ... " Sentinels " ...
Directional ....
Points to .... Facilities ...

CORRECTIONAL ... " Man PLEASE !!! " ....

Their ... " Receptacles " ...
NEED ... " Medical " ...

So that ....
They can ... Receive ...

A ... " Congressional " ... REPRIEVE ... !!!

FREE OF ............................................................."Fal­lacies" ...... !!!!!

" Recessional " ... and Decimal.
According to ... " MP's " ... !?!

and Leaders .... INTERNATIONAL ...
Who Claim to be ... " Quite Rational " ...
when sending ...  " EXPENDABLE " ... Teams ... !!!
to make SPECTACLES ... Overseas ... !!! ...

Fit For ... " Flatscreen TV's " ... !!!
or YES ... for ... " Movie Screens " ... !!!!!

That Line ... would seem ... ?
to be a ... Connectable Seam ...
to some ... " Expendables 3 " ... !!!

But Before ... I end ...
This ..... Festival .....

of wordplay ... " Intertextual " ...

Has this been ... " Hypothetical " ... ?
or what's called ... Existential ... ?!?

Well ...
What It's ... NOT ...

Is ... ****** ... !!!!!

because it's from ... " My Mental " ...
and a meeting ... " Incidental " ..............................

That ...
Somehow got ... CEREBRAL ...

" Poetic and " ...
Quite Regal ...

Exhibiting to ... People ...

How my ... UNQUENCHABLE ...
THIRST ... is ... Exceptional ... !!!

for verse that's ..... Credible ....
Respectable and ... SENSIBLE ... !!!

But NOT THIS WORD ...... !!!!!!

... " Lamentable " ... !!!

YES It's ... " Intellectual " ...

Comprehensible and ... Connectable ...
because it flows like .... Ventricles ........................................................

It also is ... Commendable ...
and ... I'd say ... INCONTESTABLE ... !!!!!

When saying ....

" It's Incredible "
Just having some fun with words after being inspired, like the poem says, by a woman out jogging in the sun, by the Caribbean Sea .....
Bay Jul 2016
Sorrow was strolling
a chill-bitten road
humming a tune,
as he passed an abode

that was lit by a furnace;
shadows danced in the glow
that the furnace cast
upon the frosted window.

Sorrow stopped for a time
to glance at the light,
then began reminiscing
to a long-ago night:

delicate child
prancing lightly around
a rain-beaten cove,
not a tear to be found.

This child bearing joy
kicks puddles in cheer,
then sees a colorful frog
on a log that is near.

He sits by this frog
with intent in his stare,
then the frog speaks clearly
"Boy, you better beware."

Confused by the voice
that sent ripples along
the puddle he sat in,
like a prophetical song.

With a tilt to his head
the boy then replied,
"What an odd thing to say,
dear frog who is pied."

The frog was quick
to retort less than coy,
"Oh, you should understand
what is coming, dear boy:

a shadow will fall
from the blue sky above,
engulfing your sight
until it darkens your love.

It will then cast a shade
which will follow your life
through the rest of your days,
bearing continual strife."

The boy quivered his lip
and sat back with despair,
as he saw the sky gray
and felt the thickening air.

His days of laughter
and innocent play,
have been cruelly stolen
on his last childhood-day.

Suddenly the boy glanced
locking eyes with the man,
who still stood in the frost,
who was glancing again

at the house which shown shadows
of delight once before,
now sits darkened and frowning
with a dilapidated door.

Sorrow now covered
in crystalized thought,
brushes icicles away
of intricate wrought.

He returns to his travel
on that chill-bitten road,
humming a tune saying,
"Goodbye, sweet abode."
Ysa Pa Jul 2017
Showed itself from underneath
An old crumpled sheet of paper
Emerged from my bed, my haven
With words that made me quiver
My eyes cannot grasp what was
I couldn't believe what I wrote
For my younger self prepared
Future and current me a note
As i straightened the creases
It was only then when I realized
Immature and inexperienced me
Could provide guidance and be wise
Was this a prophetical preparation
To recover from this colossal offset
For I wrote you a letter of adieu
Long before we have even met
ZACK GRAM Dec 2021
1 million miles per hour
Faster then China
Quicker hands then Bun'Dee
Mighty than USA
More arms then Putin's Russia
This Zacks World
Forget Cody
Mac G & **** Bean
Izm isnt... plantain
More power then Jesus or God's
A M.A.D. Man mutually assured
White Man Super Powers

My D Kryptonite

Blow these hoes *** to smitherines
Call me King Z
Now Bow!!!
P.O.W.
proudly
Alienated Aryan Prophetical
Zzz zzz
King Z
ZACK GRAM Oct 2023
Long live
Live long
The lord

Baby youre safe
I will be your servant
Any mission or command
Let commandments live thru
Long live the freedom of safe sleep
Make the rivers roar
Jets an rockets saur
13 lines of white
11 stripes of red
Pladded blue
50 stars
Standing tall for our safety

The King has been here
The King is me
THE WORLD SEES

PREDICTED
PLANNED
PROPHETICAL

Dear Gerald R Ford
I will see
Sieze an occupy
Bring piece from your destruction
An
Yes baby we will

PREVAIL
LIVE LONG
LONG LIVE YOU AN ME..
Free from War
Chandy Oct 2021
Woke up again, 3 AM
Subconsciously trying to tell me
That things are amiss
Is there a point that I have missed?
Answers on a horizon I cannot fathom
Eclipsing my vision, iris circumcision
Decisions to make, faces to fake
As my feet quake, hope gets raked
Such an ache
Wanted a rhapsody
Received a lament, such a descent
On top of the world like a king and queen
Entertaining hypotheticals
Hope is not in the reticule
I'd call myself prophetical if more were esthetical
Wanting more from myself
While my health gets put on the shelf
Flying high in the sky
Until I wake up
Then my feet and future become clandestine
BLD 6d
Obsidian ink courses through my veins,
antiquated insults tattooing my tissue,
repressed memories parasitizing my skin;
these open wounds have festered for too long,
rotten pus oozing from within. Emotional apathy
is something I yearn for, the desire to simply forget
the love I once convinced myself I held for you.

Several attempts have been made
to erase the blemishes on my persona;
anxiety, self-consciousness, suicidal tendencies
have adorned the walls of my healing,
a journey I've embarked on with no light
to lead the way. I've tried and failed,
prided and embarrassed myself,  
built identities I wished I had,
convincing myself they were endemic to me.

I've traversed the landscapes of undulating hills
dotting the horizon of nostalgic optimism,
isolated myself away from civilization,
lost the friends who prevented my downfall,
forgotten the names of those who wished to save me
from my own destructive tendencies, eventual crumbling.

I've thrown a blanket over my tumbling life,
donned a mask of confident supremacy
as to not humiliate myself for yet another time.
I've viewed myself as a pathetic usurper
of the throne of worthiness, too weak
to wear the crown of deserved exuberance,
unaware of the weight my trauma exuded
onto the entirety of my faltering body and mind.

A ritual of morning nausea riddles my routine,
throbbing headaches stapled into my cerebrum,
****** shakes and dripping tears from the words
of others who remind me so starkly of you. I've laid
hands on others who wish to view me as you did,
flashes of vibrant red obscuring the clarity of my view,
a vacant disguise devoid of authenticity,
displaced by a sense of dysphoric delusion.

I wish to redact the love I almost died for,
a valiant knight falling in the line of battle,
unaware of the forgotten valor soon to follow.
As I awake to the next day, I hold onto a new
sense of gratitude, one that has never seemed
to arise in my lightest of days. It is difficult
for me to search in the future, uncertain whether
my two feet will be implanted into the dirt
at any given time. I have lived in a torturous
temptation of the anger I harbor deep within.

Purple inflammation underneath my eyes
has become a fundamental aspect of my
everyday appearance; exhaustion plagues
my daily experiences, and I can feel
myself slowly losing life at the hands
of you – yes, I do resent you.

I do. I do. I do.

This page, stained with the blood
of every dream you disemboweled,
crumbles underneath the weight
each word carries from the past;
my brain is home to a nest of hornets,
eager to pounce on perceived threats
often falsified in the face of distress.

I should release the restraints of the past,
drop the reins of the reign you once held
over the facets of my life, every nook
storing my deepest fears from the light
of day, the ones I hoped would never
turn true, only to find them arisen
as prophetical visions of our destiny.

This torture has endured for too long,
and the forgiveness I find myself
searching for continues to evade
my mindful cognizance. I’ve tried
to accept the faults parried onto me,
yet closure’s absence acts as an obstacle
preventing me from pardoning your sins.

This is the death of what I’ve held for too long,
a eulogy for the remnants of our shredded portrait,
its parchment slowly decomposing, pieces wafting
away in the breeze of the bay, reminiscent of memories
rusted with double-edged silence, slices of past lives
stitched together with the woven thread of trauma.
Page upon page stapled together, tangible reminders
of declassified documents detailing the secrets of us;
stylistic differences in poetical works may inhibit
the comprehension of such dense material, yet the
manuscript of my emptiness can only be conveyed
through such solidity. I approach the day when
my commentary begins to dissipate, fading into
a personification of demonstrative apathy. I wave
goodbye to the eagles, release my grip on Andrews
and our bench propped against our lake’s shoreline,
close my eyes and envision the pink skies of Manhattan
without your silhouette blocking the view, taste the ramen
spilt onto the grasses of Central Park, inhale the aroma
of midnight amateurs huddled over a pan of pasta. Yes,
this is the death of what I’ve held for too long.

— The End —