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"postponing" poems
P-Postponing all those things until another time R-Rostering them for attention down the track O-Offering all sorts of excuses stalls one's climb C-Constantly one defers the mounting job stack R-Repeatedly ignoring their pealing bell chimes A-Acting upon them requires an assertive knack S-Still one avers in responding to their rhymes T-Taking not a step forward nor any back I-Initiative and get in and do it isn't one's paradigm N-Never does one heed their ever tolling clacks A-Always sitting in an idle non moving show time T-The day shall arrive with a great waking whack I-Into motion one shall soon be called to climb O-On one's toes the chores are waiting in the rack N-No more disregarding the many sounding chimes
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May 4, 2013
May 4, 2013 at 9:37 PM UTC
Procrastination (Acrostic Poem)
Now, moving in, cartons on the floor, the radio playing to bare walls, picture hooks left stranded in the unsoiled squares where paintings were, and something reminding us this is like all other moving days; finding the ***** ends of someone else's life, hair fallen in the sink, a peach pit, and burned-out matches in the corner; things not preserved, yet never swept away like fragments of disturbing dreams we stumble on all day. . . in ordering our lives, we will discard them, scrub clean the floorboards of this our home lest refuse from the lives we did not lead become, in some strange, frightening way, our own. And we have plans that will not tolerate our fears-- a year laid out like rooms in a new house--the dusty wine glasses rinsed off, the vases filled, and bookshelves sagging with heavy winter books. Seeing the room always as it will be, we are content to dust and wait. We will return here from the dark and silent streets, arms full of books and food, anxious as we always are in winter, and looking for the Good Life we have made. I see myself then: tense, solemn, in high-heeled shoes that pinch, not basking in the light of goals fulfilled, but looking back to now and seeing a lazy, sunburned, sandaled girl in a bare room, full of promise and feeling envious. Now we plan, postponing, pushing our lives forward into the future--as if, when the room contains us and all our treasured junk we will have filled whatever gap it is that makes us wander, discontented from ourselves. The room will not change: a rug, or armchair, or new coat of paint won't make much difference; our eyes are fickle but we remain the same beneath our suntans, pale, frightened, dreaming ourselves backward and forward in time, dreaming our dreaming selves. I look forward and see myself looking back.
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3.8k
Autumn Perspective
Now, moving in, cartons on the floor, the radio playing to bare walls, picture hooks left stranded in the unsoiled squares where paintings were, and something reminding us this is like all other moving days; finding the ***** ends of someone else's life, hair fallen in the sink, a peach pit, and burned-out matches in the corner; things not preserved, yet never swept away like fragments of disturbing dreams we stumble on all day. . . in ordering our lives, we will discard them, scrub clean the floorboards of this our home lest refuse from the lives we did not lead become, in some strange, frightening way, our own. And we have plans that will not tolerate our fears-- a year laid out like rooms in a new house--the dusty wine glasses rinsed off, the vases filled, and bookshelves sagging with heavy winter books. Seeing the room always as it will be, we are content to dust and wait. We will return here from the dark and silent streets, arms full of books and food, anxious as we always are in winter, and looking for the Good Life we have made. I see myself then: tense, solemn, in high-heeled shoes that pinch, not basking in the light of goals fulfilled, but looking back to now and seeing a lazy, sunburned, sandaled girl in a bare room, full of promise and feeling envious. Now we plan, postponing, pushing our lives forward into the future--as if, when the room contains us and all our treasured junk we will have filled whatever gap it is that makes us wander, discontented from ourselves. The room will not change: a rug, or armchair, or new coat of paint won't make much difference; our eyes are fickle but we remain the same beneath our suntans, pale, frightened, dreaming ourselves backward and forward in time, dreaming our dreaming selves. I look forward and see myself looking back.
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49
Ever had the feeling of being trapped in a glass box with the air slowly running out, with every breath? In sun, rain, snow and storm, the box gets dark or warm but what you can do always remains the same. Have you just simply wanted to walk away or break free? To travel the world taming Lion cubs and petting great white sharks? To wake up to a sunrise in a Dutch farm and watch it set over the Mediterranean sea? To teach children in Thailand or India? To salsa on the streets of Mexico or be blinded by the lights in Dubai? Have you ever wanted to be border-less? To not be punished for being born in a country where the sun is hot and people are poor? Have you ever just wanted to work, get a place, pay taxes, and not ignore the growling of your stomach so your 5 pound takeaway stretches over 3 days postponing the date to buy the next food stock? Have you ever wanted to check your bank account without having your fingers crossed, because even though you know the exact balance you hope by some miracle it will be more? Have you prayed for immigration to back the hell off leaving you to make a living without risking deportation? Have you ever got tired of playing by the rules when the Albanian Mafia and Walmart makes more money per hour than what you'd make in a lifetime, or two? With heart aches and emotional games, and attending Sunday mass becoming more of a cliché, with rejection and doors closed, at the cost of owning a brown passport, with your head spinning and back against the wall, have you wondered what life wants from you at all? To all the women being trafficked for *** and the children slaving away spinning Persian carpets, tonight it's too cold to snow outside my glass box. Inside, it's too sad to cry...
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Feb 22, 2013
Feb 22, 2013 at 8:16 PM UTC
When the going gets tough
Ever had the feeling of being trapped in a glass box with the air slowly running out, with every breath? In sun, rain, snow and storm, the box gets dark or warm but what you can do always remains the same. Have you just simply wanted to walk away or break free? To travel the world taming Lion cubs and petting great white sharks? To wake up to a sunrise in a Dutch farm and watch it set over the Mediterranean sea? To teach children in Thailand or India? To salsa on the streets of Mexico or be blinded by the lights in Dubai? Have you ever wanted to be border-less? To not be punished for being born in a country where the sun is hot and people are poor? Have you ever just wanted to work, get a place, pay taxes, and not ignore the growling of your stomach so your 5 pound takeaway stretches over 3 days postponing the date to buy the next food stock? Have you ever wanted to check your bank account without having your fingers crossed, because even though you know the exact balance you hope by some miracle it will be more? Have you prayed for immigration to back the hell off leaving you to make a living without risking deportation? Have you ever got tired of playing by the rules when the Albanian Mafia and Walmart makes more money per hour than what you'd make in a lifetime, or two? With heart aches and emotional games, and attending Sunday mass becoming more of a cliché, with rejection and doors closed, at the cost of owning a brown passport, with your head spinning and back against the wall, have you wondered what life wants from you at all? To all the women being trafficked for *** and the children slaving away spinning Persian carpets, tonight it's too cold to snow outside my glass box. Inside, it's too sad to cry...
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35
The real power of desire is doing the right thing at the right time; It's about making a decision knowing that nobody's going to notice your good works; There's so much negative imagery of black fatherhood in continuously postponing to do right; You should ask yourself, “how come postponing things hasn't paid but instead it's robbed me; How come that's not as newsworthy? Do it now. The real power of character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking; There are too many people who think that good things are best done under people's watch; Make an initiative to change the way you handle matters of procrastination in your everyday life; Then you will know that Initiative is doing the right thing without being told, and doing the best; It's a choice, not a chance; it's an initiative not only a desire; Do it now. It's not doubt that the biggest exam that we fail each day is discouragement test; Does it mean that life it not always fair for people who fail the test of discouragement; I believe in the contrary; I believe that if you keep doing things in time, you always be right; Next to doing the right thing at the right time, is to let yourself know you are doing the right thing; So, ethics are not necessarily to do with being law-abiding but being interested in the moral path to do it now.
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Dec 4, 2013
Dec 4, 2013 at 4:06 AM UTC
Do It Now
awakening torturing mind with stark perfection of a song serving as the giving mother who never did try to hold you so close as the clouds break in rapid succession in a sweltering sky tiptoe through lands of dreams, afraid to witness awakening to ruddy shots of possibility postponing courage again, testing the waters proving that theories move in odd ways rushing to bite the hand which holds out a bleeding heart in hopes of acceptance there’s a hollow ring in the crater when shouts fall on deaf ears but comprehension leaks fluid like organic matter from a sieve and words are mere petals straining to hold onto the flower head but the strands of life must persist in natural fall among so many other things, we lose sixty hair strands each day--- why stop at reason? lap and with eyes closed, you place your head on my lap and I stroke away all your cares in the hopes to soften that blistered terrain raging inside and sagacity will wash over us and render sweet oblivion to concerns of the world there will come in our lives, so many laps and countless hurdles can one really place importance on which lap counts more than another?
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Jan 13, 2014
Jan 13, 2014 at 5:24 AM UTC
lap
is there noon on this comparison, and where does the stabilising hour care to fathom the giant and dwarf shadows of original shapes? if there is no magnetism of the clock's hour, minute, second, then the only magnetism apparent in the encircling of digestion / decimalisation, is to say the north of a compass, the compass' north equivalence of a clock's misdirecting eternity: of space for a clock asserting a mingling reason: the compass found it's existential reason in the north, yet the clock found it's "north" without care for magnetism, it equated the north with space, and yet what was encapsulated with rotary qualities? for clock the perpetuation of tick tock in space / for the clock treated space as a one-dimensional abstract, with its three-temporal awareness, and yet the compass said north thrice, and on the fourth said Antarctica was loosened to be explored. i'm so tired - lifeless poetry, make words encoded; i'm so tired, so tiresome of other people with bellies filled and eyes in medium postponing, to compass the needle a gravity of servitude for the clock of 12 (north), 6 (south), and the disputed 9 (east) with 3 the (west), darting eyes in Bahamas for direction coarse yet coerced by a promise, thus the compass riddling a madness of constant stimulation with magnetism and the magnet cursor of orbit - wound three dimensions of time, space optional, space always optional, as ever time over-arching to be understood... where then the compass, where then the clock, if the compass led by vector of magnetism to an uncertain place, if the clock led by vector of missing magnetism to a certain place of eased: tick, tock, tick, tock... will that be equally given a wavering of east, west, east west.... north, south... what now?!
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Mar 14, 2016
Mar 14, 2016 at 7:47 PM UTC
compass and clock
is there noon on this comparison, and where does the stabilising hour care to fathom the giant and dwarf shadows of original shapes? if there is no magnetism of the clock's hour, minute, second, then the only magnetism apparent in the encircling of digestion / decimalisation, is to say the north of a compass, the compass' north equivalence of a clock's misdirecting eternity: of space for a clock asserting a mingling reason: the compass found it's existential reason in the north, yet the clock found it's "north" without care for magnetism, it equated the north with space, and yet what was encapsulated with rotary qualities? for clock the perpetuation of tick tock in space / for the clock treated space as a one-dimensional abstract, with its three-temporal awareness, and yet the compass said north thrice, and on the fourth said Antarctica was loosened to be explored. i'm so tired - lifeless poetry, make words encoded; i'm so tired, so tiresome of other people with bellies filled and eyes in medium postponing, to compass the needle a gravity of servitude for the clock of 12 (north), 6 (south), and the disputed 9 (east) with 3 the (west), darting eyes in Bahamas for direction coarse yet coerced by a promise, thus the compass riddling a madness of constant stimulation with magnetism and the magnet cursor of orbit - wound three dimensions of time, space optional, space always optional, as ever time over-arching to be understood... where then the compass, where then the clock, if the compass led by vector of magnetism to an uncertain place, if the clock led by vector of missing magnetism to a certain place of eased: tick, tock, tick, tock... will that be equally given a wavering of east, west, east west.... north, south... what now?!
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27
एक हमारा सत्य परस्पर, जो रहस्य बन छिपा रहता है जीवन भर This is our one mutual truth, friend, that remains hidden a mystery all life: खेलते रहते हैं हम, टालते, कसरती मेहनती हैं, कसरातों महनतों में खोए रहतें हैं हम we are busy playing, postponing the question, and we are workers, we remain immersed in our efforts and struggles all life पर कभी कभी, कल और आज तक का हो सकता है अंतर, कि 'मित्र' बोलने का नही मिलता अवसर but a day comes, when the difference is but between the morrow, and there's no time to even call out 'friend' आ जाता है वो बुलावा, तो व्यूह में फस कभी लौट नहीं पाते, when the call comes, so caught up we become, that return is not an option from the maelstrom अचानक सा वो दिन आ जाता है जब आ सामने उभर कर suddenly, that we have kept hidden, comes alive emerging from shadows ये है जो हमारा सत्य परस्पर, रहस्य बन रहता है जो जीवन भर This our mutual truth, that remains hidden a mystery all life.
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Feb 1, 2014
Feb 1, 2014 at 12:58 AM UTC
Satya paraspar | Our mutual truth
She was old when I first knew her To an infant, parents are timeless; Fairy aunts are just… old. A tiny scarecrow of a thing, Her eyes glittered; her mouth Never offered an ill word of anyone. She was a good woman. She never tired Of talking about blind Jim – a good man – With girlish love in her face; One man, one love, one life He wove wicker and filled mattresses And listened to the wireless in the evening. Her constant thought companion As so many might-have-been heroes – Gone, before I could know him. Christmas would wend round each year, With Meg as star guest, Tipsy before the Queen’s Speech, Whisky rouging her cheeks; fairy lights Made envious by her laughter, My mother, and hers, basking in gleelight. I grew up there, every other Sunday, Overlooking the Hospital and the Tay From the safety of her living-room window, Inventing spaceships and spies, Dreaming of who I would be, As my mother and Meg made small-talk. Month by month, her daylight dimmed. I never saw it. She was only ever her; Happy, constant and true.  Afterwards, I learned about the Vying accountants and surgeons, Postponing, year and again, The procedure. She told me, when finally Her appointment was confirmed, That when the cataracts were gone, She was going to buy a ticket For the number nine circular And spend all day upstairs, Just looking out of the window At the city she’d lived in For nigh-on ninety years A week before the operation Her home-help found her in bed, with Jim; Smiling as they danced through the daisies. She seemed no older when she died Than when I first knew her. A good innings, they all said. Not enough. If only by the length of a bus ticket – not enough.
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Feb 26, 2013
Feb 26, 2013 at 5:27 AM UTC
Day Tripper
She was old when I first knew her To an infant, parents are timeless; Fairy aunts are just… old. A tiny scarecrow of a thing, Her eyes glittered; her mouth Never offered an ill word of anyone. She was a good woman. She never tired Of talking about blind Jim – a good man – With girlish love in her face; One man, one love, one life He wove wicker and filled mattresses And listened to the wireless in the evening. Her constant thought companion As so many might-have-been heroes – Gone, before I could know him. Christmas would wend round each year, With Meg as star guest, Tipsy before the Queen’s Speech, Whisky rouging her cheeks; fairy lights Made envious by her laughter, My mother, and hers, basking in gleelight. I grew up there, every other Sunday, Overlooking the Hospital and the Tay From the safety of her living-room window, Inventing spaceships and spies, Dreaming of who I would be, As my mother and Meg made small-talk. Month by month, her daylight dimmed. I never saw it. She was only ever her; Happy, constant and true.  Afterwards, I learned about the Vying accountants and surgeons, Postponing, year and again, The procedure. She told me, when finally Her appointment was confirmed, That when the cataracts were gone, She was going to buy a ticket For the number nine circular And spend all day upstairs, Just looking out of the window At the city she’d lived in For nigh-on ninety years A week before the operation Her home-help found her in bed, with Jim; Smiling as they danced through the daisies. She seemed no older when she died Than when I first knew her. A good innings, they all said. Not enough. If only by the length of a bus ticket – not enough.
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52
Guess I'll be postponing December's reconstructive surgery There's nothing like being delayed from your own burglary It had potential too, well maybe if it wasn't so ruthful I'll still tentatively deem it as successful I started to shed the lingering fatigue I began to think of my completed protocols Triggered the realization I need the reconstruction after all
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Jul 8, 2010
Jul 8, 2010 at 10:05 AM UTC
The Deconstruction Of Reconstructing
Hundreds of those small black birds Soaring above a golden hill Grass dead, as they thought they were, Laying there watching No sound Until the roaring Unmistakable, Overhead the screams The flapping of the wings Forcing the air once more into their lungs Postponing yet another collapse and they faced the breeze renewed.
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Feb 25, 2013
Feb 25, 2013 at 3:59 PM UTC
Coming Together
self-harm isn't always cutting sometimes it's ignoring your hunger postponing your sleep and picking at your face every ******* time it's listening to music in maximum volume pushing away your friends and not turning on the water heater when it's cold but turning it on when it's hot it is when you don't say anything even though you're already dying just so the people around you can live without all the noise
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Jan 19, 2017
Jan 19, 2017 at 6:33 AM UTC
trigger warning
you walk in i'm standing there spritzing lingerie to make it reek like high class prostitutes do after a night when the cash flow is non-stop "Hi how are you today?" "Grumble, grrrrr, grumble." "Can I help you find anything?" "Well, grrrr, I want the bra, arrrggghhh, I've got on. LOOK AT IT!" i slowly approach, postponing the inevitable for as long as possible as you lift your ancient once black, now grey, turtleneck and release an avalanche of layer after layer of blubber that jiggles ever so slightly as it is disturbed by the movement it is covered in a thick forest of black hairs and i swear i see a herd of lice scurry off as i cautiously lift my hands to inspect the tag laying in the depths of the jungle that lays thick on your back the moment i make contact with your skin it takes all of my willpower not to pull away in disgust as my fingers go for a ride on the slip n' slide that is your back it feels as if you have been bathing in Crisco since you were just a child as i finally grasp the worn and stretched material and turn it over i'm not surprised to find that your bra feels as if it just went for a swim in Onondaga Lake mmm, sweet, sweet radioactive sweat i fumble around looking for any indication of a tag as you begin to tap your foot with no rhythm at all and suddenly you exclaim, "OH, I cut the tag out of this ages ago!" and storm away back into the mall throwing bows and ***** looks as you go i'm left staring as my sweat saturated hands thinking, **** Victoria and her secrets."
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Mar 30, 2011
Mar 30, 2011 at 10:23 AM UTC
secrets, secrets are no fun.
you walk in i'm standing there spritzing lingerie to make it reek like high class prostitutes do after a night when the cash flow is non-stop "Hi how are you today?" "Grumble, grrrrr, grumble." "Can I help you find anything?" "Well, grrrr, I want the bra, arrrggghhh, I've got on. LOOK AT IT!" i slowly approach, postponing the inevitable for as long as possible as you lift your ancient once black, now grey, turtleneck and release an avalanche of layer after layer of blubber that jiggles ever so slightly as it is disturbed by the movement it is covered in a thick forest of black hairs and i swear i see a herd of lice scurry off as i cautiously lift my hands to inspect the tag laying in the depths of the jungle that lays thick on your back the moment i make contact with your skin it takes all of my willpower not to pull away in disgust as my fingers go for a ride on the slip n' slide that is your back it feels as if you have been bathing in Crisco since you were just a child as i finally grasp the worn and stretched material and turn it over i'm not surprised to find that your bra feels as if it just went for a swim in Onondaga Lake mmm, sweet, sweet radioactive sweat i fumble around looking for any indication of a tag as you begin to tap your foot with no rhythm at all and suddenly you exclaim, "OH, I cut the tag out of this ages ago!" and storm away back into the mall throwing bows and ***** looks as you go i'm left staring as my sweat saturated hands thinking, **** Victoria and her secrets."
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59
There are rules and protocol, movements and routine not quite episodic and semantic-- non-declared transition and rituals, rounded manners distinct from infinite loop and routed inner biplane hemmed to a sight line, spiraling death down. Earth or Spitfire flare dare? Grounded embrace forever comes. I move, postponing and extending. The declared break is now. Airflow ripples, and eyes tear. Straining shear forces reducing reasoned response to instinctual joysticks. Old, new, modified, learned sticky quirks of friends, Lost love lingering, switching ***** adjusting yaw, pushing yoke, subtle procedural affectations stolen, infused in to fly, bank, and escape.
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Feb 4, 2013
Feb 4, 2013 at 6:49 PM UTC
Non-declared
Five o'clock Is naked Is harsh Is too bright in rusty eyes Blame the night before For the cruel punishment Of one more day Is it so exhausting To exist? Postponing final rest To avoid ending it. Then again If it was final I'd be rushing to the finish.
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Mar 21, 2013
Mar 21, 2013 at 9:59 AM UTC
Sentiment
I'd been trying to do something with my life, Any ******* thing But i've always been too easily distracted, especially with the promise of tangible experiences, Like the seeing of sounds and the tasting of love. He said just come round, what's it matter anyway? And as I could give no answer to the meaning of life, Here i stand again. Nineteen it is now, Nineteen small white pills, And they won't do much if i swallow them, I've tried that one before. But if i didn't know better i may well try again. Prehaps at the end of the year, when it will be twenty glistening childs teeth, I could try again, Double the dose, Triple the dose. Slot them into a double scoop ice cream, Eat up all my desert, Then allow my soul to desert my body, Once more, on a one way flight. I'll postpone the inevitable for now, Its what we're all busy doing anyhow. But i've seen more in my short life than hollow headed women baring their ******* for just one more drink that might help forget their boredom, And sporting young men, desperate for attention in any form it may come, Some form of reassurance, We're glad you're alive son, we sure are. He sat there in an oversized jersey, and i wished he'd let me crawl up inside it, To sit there in his lap and cry myself to sleep, No, No! I've had quite enough of such foolish business. It's in the past. But isn't it all? The past is never really gone, I don't trust it for a minute. I don't trust much.
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Mar 24, 2013
Mar 24, 2013 at 5:52 PM UTC
Postponing
An empty coffee mug.....    Could evoke impending sadness between you and the empty vessel, are some private, reflective moments It could mean, it is time for you to stand up,     away from the coffee table and start your daily grind face another day in your life... An empty coffee mug could lead to the end of a long exhausting day the end of a conversation the end of a relationship :( Coffee is gone, lots of things have to be done maybe, It is time to leave an old life old beliefs, give away old clothes, old books some goodbyes have to be said to old friends gone...old self, and to old pricking, stabbing pain... move to another house, for a new life new opportunities, new friends new surroundings, await Each season segues to the next yellow-green, brown, fuschia pink red-orange, purple, even aqua-blue slowly, but surely, they all turn to gray the lovely colors of Spring, Summer and  Autumn, become ashen...and die but... after a while, they surely give way, a springing of new life could never be held at bay ....................................... out of the coffee shop or maybe, outside your room...just stop, it could be a stretch from your scope of view you are faced with the birthing of everything new there is sun shining for sure.....a moon rising ......................................... An empty coffee mug could mean, the end of your break time stop wallowing quit postponing focus back on work and things to be prioritized now is the time...got to move on..... Sally Copyright September 2015 Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
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Oct 10, 2015
Oct 10, 2015 at 1:14 AM UTC
AN EMPTY COFFEE MUG...
An empty coffee mug.....    Could evoke impending sadness between you and the empty vessel, are some private, reflective moments It could mean, it is time for you to stand up,     away from the coffee table and start your daily grind face another day in your life... An empty coffee mug could lead to the end of a long exhausting day the end of a conversation the end of a relationship :( Coffee is gone, lots of things have to be done maybe, It is time to leave an old life old beliefs, give away old clothes, old books some goodbyes have to be said to old friends gone...old self, and to old pricking, stabbing pain... move to another house, for a new life new opportunities, new friends new surroundings, await Each season segues to the next yellow-green, brown, fuschia pink red-orange, purple, even aqua-blue slowly, but surely, they all turn to gray the lovely colors of Spring, Summer and  Autumn, become ashen...and die but... after a while, they surely give way, a springing of new life could never be held at bay ....................................... out of the coffee shop or maybe, outside your room...just stop, it could be a stretch from your scope of view you are faced with the birthing of everything new there is sun shining for sure.....a moon rising ......................................... An empty coffee mug could mean, the end of your break time stop wallowing quit postponing focus back on work and things to be prioritized now is the time...got to move on..... Sally Copyright September 2015 Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
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53
Suicidal thoughts often flashed across my mind. I might have lived and died million times. I searched for the way to reach suicidal point Short cut, long cut any cut to reach. But I couldn't get one So I just postponed it for an hour. My thoughts went on traveling too far But it hanged between If, that and this. What will happen after this? So I went on postponing For days, months and years. If I announce, I will be self imprisoned With charges of penalty and some punishment maybe, For keeping such thoughts with me. It's just illegal and burnt of shame just adds another one. If I bring into action and I am dead I will be just buried down dead with few tears shed. If alive after all these stunts A severe punishment on self And I may come into the notice of many Ashamed and chopped I will Be whoever sees me! It's as good as being buried alive! For time being everything stands Postponed! Though the topic is too harsh and rough, Based on reality. Such things happens when one looses control on self. Be in a light mood while reading this poem As you may also love And I request you to postponed If such thoughts you are keeping in your mind! Postpone it for sometime! Just see you may find another way out As some minute changes in our life Can bring a lot of difference in our thoughts I know its just easy to spell be positive Just postpone it for time being for you aren't going to loose anything As the life is too valuable and precious which can never be reverted back Once dead. Just wait and watch patiently. Sure a sun will rise in your way as it did for me too! ©ALL RIGHTS RESERVED BY GEETHA JAYAKUMAR 2014 Geetha Jayakumar
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Jan 8, 2015
Jan 8, 2015 at 11:24 AM UTC
Suicidal thoughts!
Suicidal thoughts often flashed across my mind. I might have lived and died million times. I searched for the way to reach suicidal point Short cut, long cut any cut to reach. But I couldn't get one So I just postponed it for an hour. My thoughts went on traveling too far But it hanged between If, that and this. What will happen after this? So I went on postponing For days, months and years. If I announce, I will be self imprisoned With charges of penalty and some punishment maybe, For keeping such thoughts with me. It's just illegal and burnt of shame just adds another one. If I bring into action and I am dead I will be just buried down dead with few tears shed. If alive after all these stunts A severe punishment on self And I may come into the notice of many Ashamed and chopped I will Be whoever sees me! It's as good as being buried alive! For time being everything stands Postponed! Though the topic is too harsh and rough, Based on reality. Such things happens when one looses control on self. Be in a light mood while reading this poem As you may also love And I request you to postponed If such thoughts you are keeping in your mind! Postpone it for sometime! Just see you may find another way out As some minute changes in our life Can bring a lot of difference in our thoughts I know its just easy to spell be positive Just postpone it for time being for you aren't going to loose anything As the life is too valuable and precious which can never be reverted back Once dead. Just wait and watch patiently. Sure a sun will rise in your way as it did for me too! ©ALL RIGHTS RESERVED BY GEETHA JAYAKUMAR 2014 Geetha Jayakumar
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45
I can only summon feelingfulness like the passing of a dove, postponing its arrival mid-air, somewhere along the tucked bramble across Poblacion, starting with metaphorical sensibility or an insensibly bland space to procure wanted meaning. Girls prefer roses and their bright foreheads diademed with more flowers, and boys, their chiaroscuro or lack of a color thereof, seems to be fitting in this maladroit contrast, and so I begin, as always, with your very vague and caged memory. Your face, the whiteness of snowcapped alps. Your strut, my slalom in a treacherous course of words reduced to whisperings, to flutings. Your voice, though nuanced, flitters with an overtone of arrogance: if sound was clothed, yours would be flamboyant ermine. And the line in front of you before I, my arbitrary turn, assimilates into a picturesque form of waiting somewhere in Cubao. I wanted to smash myself with train-speed towards the metallic turnstile, which, would then famish me even so, just as much as I wish to be a car crash somewhere within the outskirts of your town, heavily vandalized by the swill of squalor hefting itself like the rest of the world conscious of its viscera.   This is how I start you – like waiting for the sun to emerge by Borobudur, or the clandestine *** of mildew and grass, a hundredfold of images appear before me and I cannot choose upon my whims and caprices. Are you a dove? A spear of Sun? A thunderous crackle of an impending rain? A harlequin? A moseying cirrus? Or just another by-stander in the crowds where I ultimately seek your being?       This answerlessness measures my knowledge of star, and my breath snuffed out of me while I sigh from exhausted penchants, outweigh dissimilarities and symmetries. A progeny from all superseding conundrums arises: are you a retrogression of a wave back to its saltine wound, flailing in brine? Or are you just the vast sea and nothing else on a fine and lucid day where children skip stones and chant name-callings?                    I sense the peril in this undertaking, and much to my chagrin, I still    do not know how to end you.
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Jan 27, 2016
Jan 27, 2016 at 3:09 AM UTC
What Are You?
I can only summon feelingfulness like the passing of a dove, postponing its arrival mid-air, somewhere along the tucked bramble across Poblacion, starting with metaphorical sensibility or an insensibly bland space to procure wanted meaning. Girls prefer roses and their bright foreheads diademed with more flowers, and boys, their chiaroscuro or lack of a color thereof, seems to be fitting in this maladroit contrast, and so I begin, as always, with your very vague and caged memory. Your face, the whiteness of snowcapped alps. Your strut, my slalom in a treacherous course of words reduced to whisperings, to flutings. Your voice, though nuanced, flitters with an overtone of arrogance: if sound was clothed, yours would be flamboyant ermine. And the line in front of you before I, my arbitrary turn, assimilates into a picturesque form of waiting somewhere in Cubao. I wanted to smash myself with train-speed towards the metallic turnstile, which, would then famish me even so, just as much as I wish to be a car crash somewhere within the outskirts of your town, heavily vandalized by the swill of squalor hefting itself like the rest of the world conscious of its viscera.   This is how I start you – like waiting for the sun to emerge by Borobudur, or the clandestine *** of mildew and grass, a hundredfold of images appear before me and I cannot choose upon my whims and caprices. Are you a dove? A spear of Sun? A thunderous crackle of an impending rain? A harlequin? A moseying cirrus? Or just another by-stander in the crowds where I ultimately seek your being?       This answerlessness measures my knowledge of star, and my breath snuffed out of me while I sigh from exhausted penchants, outweigh dissimilarities and symmetries. A progeny from all superseding conundrums arises: are you a retrogression of a wave back to its saltine wound, flailing in brine? Or are you just the vast sea and nothing else on a fine and lucid day where children skip stones and chant name-callings?                    I sense the peril in this undertaking, and much to my chagrin, I still    do not know how to end you.
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30
It’s a dead man’s farm that flows row after row A strange sick decaying crop that does not grow But spouts stone statues and musty monuments Digging dirt of different quantities and qualities Slightly stiff and dark to light brown ground under Layers of soft white light reflecting wet snow They rip the frozen ground apart just for me Tentatively at first then with a fiercer force Deeper and deeper into the well of hell The dark chamber which carries my broken shell Those plots of stagnant crops postponing their rot Worms inching and struggling but never piercing Never startled nor fearing the truth that is searing I am a planted seed never meant to grow Potential never allowed to flow and show Life as the cycling gift it truly is The farm expands men multiplied by women Children and elderly corpses cut too closely No corn, milk, eggs, beans, bacon, wheat, or honey Just lanes of dead men farming for nothingness
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Jul 3, 2015
Jul 3, 2015 at 11:26 AM UTC
Dead Man's Farm
A surging, endless lamentation, Of past mistakes created. A shrill eternal ululation, Never to be sedated. Visions through a fish eyed lens, Full of unwavering scope. Kaleidoscopic patterns descends, Organic structures full of hope. As the patterns turn over and under, Weaving themselves in delicate filigree. Colour and shape blended asunder, Emerges the silhouette of an ancient tree. Bearing fruit that initiates elation, And sweet nectar that electrifies. Flowers bloom, ornate decoration, A tribute to the ethereal beauty that it supplies. Golden flavoured aromatic vapours rise, Bioluminescence glowing grand. Its purpose difficult to surmise, Growing graciously tall it does stand. Then violently the tree it does ****** Itself from its essence. Leaving us with ourselves to trust, In our veracious nescience. It’s branches and leaves now just a memory. The after taste seems so bitter, And with it leaving a given summary, Of our concepts that dither and flitter. A trembling realisation. Show me your soul and I’ll show you mine. Torrid and flustered anticipation, As we gaze at one another our hearts align. Hold onto that moment, In its singularity benign. Postponing atonement, Clutching on to the supposed divine. Pragmatic paradigm shift. From the echelons of infinity. Negativity gently drift, As we accept our divinity.
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Feb 4, 2015
Feb 4, 2015 at 7:18 PM UTC
The Tree
I know we all give up on, Lost causes when the time's up. But my heart keeps beating, Knowing that we will make it through. You could keep me honest, You could keep me from everything, Everything that makes me self destructive. You could keep me from setting myself aflame. I know that everything is messed up, Waiting for the sound of the gong, To dance around my head, Keeping my heartbeat sound. And I know I keep ******* Everything up time and time again, But I promise I'll be here, If only you'll be here with me. I know I'm a mess, I don't need the sight of, A needle or a drop of my blood, To tell me that. Maybe I need a few pills, To keep me alive, Or maybe you'll be the, ****** I need tonight. Maybe you're the rush, Baby you're the rush, I keep on postponing, Keep on putting off the question. But give me one more shot, Give me one more ***** One more rush and I promise, I'll ask for just one more each time.
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Dec 31, 2014
Dec 31, 2014 at 4:48 PM UTC
You Saved Me Once Before (But That Rush Has Got Me Stuck On You)
Living in the middle of the beginning of the end To much time taken None left to spend The shoulder devil's my guardian angels only friend Quality of life a dying trend Tucked into a deathbed Then pretend to be on the mend Bend the truth until it's a lie that you have to defend Be yourself See what happens then Hang in there like the cat poster said Only postponing the fall in the end Forced to contend With that of which becomes to much to comprehend Then, It starts all over again Over And over And over again ©2024
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Dec 7, 2024
Dec 7, 2024 at 5:06 PM UTC
~•§•~ Starting Over, Over and Over Again ~•§•~
Lately, I have been postponing Writing about the palms of your hands. Procrastinating thoughts written down Concerning the color of your eyes. In fear of looking at you in a positive light Once more. You see, when I dedicate verses To the specifics of your smile. I tend to get caught up In feelings of attachment. And I live with the fear That you will leave just as easily as you came. I suppose I will let myself cling To every lingering thought of you. Allow myself to ponder the rasp of your voice In the early hours of the morning. Allot myself time to reminisce On the tenderness of your touch. Slowly, I am becoming more attached; Sticking to you like sweet honey. Your words are half of a chainlink fence; And mine connect with yours exclusively.
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Dec 25, 2015
Dec 25, 2015 at 11:19 PM UTC
Postponing Thoughts of You
**** anxiety, postponing my sleep and dreams. Take me away now.
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Sep 9, 2012
Sep 9, 2012 at 12:46 AM UTC
Haiku
Did you hear the boom? Then quite, calm, to tragedy. The comings of the gloom. I might mistake the sound of it, the concussions are so low, they are little, peice by peice until the hammer drops. Mighty us to revil in and then to shelter hide. Is this, but of the meddling of what we have to show. All the workings of a peace with no regard to then. Yet, out so loudly do we go. When silent did we make our voice. The railing we suspend. It was a bomb, that brought to heel. The world we wish to never know A mushroom that lights the sky. Away, away we go. So You and I have heard the sound, . A telling noise that is but brief. The shock so imminent. The world that's at its precipice. And we do look away. So decision. Life revision or to crumbling. That might then stop the lazy tears and postponing of these things. That it is always of the now, And of our lives to cherish. Without the foresight of the past Is future never known. Yet, you and I can change the land, and keep the world we have. Or might to burn within the sun's Reactive gifted glow.
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Nov 14, 2018
Nov 14, 2018 at 9:17 PM UTC
My strange love.