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Olive Jun 2018
She is dead.
It’s fate’s fault.
But only sixteen.
That’s too young
To leave us.

He found it.
Her dead body,
Under the dock.
She’d been missing
For 45 minutes.

She was dead
Before anyone knew.
He never forgot
Finding her there,
Already far gone.

The ambulance came,
But too late.
No hope left
That she might
Still be okay.

It tore him.
Tore him apart.
You could see
The hurt inside
His circled eyes.

It started small
Just a sore,
On his cheek.
But it grew.
And it spread.

From one came
Another and another
Painful sores on
His deformed face,
Eating him away.

Then he left,
To find help.
Because it hurt
Far too much.
Even inside him..

He was gone
A long time.
We were hoping
He found whatever
Help he needed.

We finally heard.
A letter came.
But from him?
We didn’t know.
We couldn’t tell.

Scrawled in marker,
Were two words.
Our hearts stopped.
There it said
Only: “HELP
           JUDE”

He needs help?
Or found it?
We didn’t know.
Then we saw
Something more chilling.

A photograph slipped
From the envelope.
It was him.
But was it?
Didn’t look right.

His face, gone.
Rotted by sores.
Eaten all  away.
Hollow. Empty. Gone.
Then we knew.

In silent shame
Our eyes closed.
Because we knew
We should have
Helped him first.

We were the
Help he needed
Before he needed
Anything at all.
“We didn’t know.”

A bad excuse
Because we knew.
We always knew.

You always know.
The story of my best friend's brother and a dream I had about him several months after she died.
Nebuleiii Mar 2013
To my innocence, naivety, and viridity
Childish ways, high school days.
A mere three weeks, I say good bye
With a cry, a tear, a sigh.

To blue slacks, and a polo
Black shoes and white socks
To my pink skirt, and white blouse,
Pleated, soon to be folded.

To the OHS rooms of our first and second years:
The broken windows, and tantrum-kicked chairs,
The broom box behind the spider webbed chalkboard,
Messages on the wall hand printed in red and green.

The broken doorknobs, and broken floorboards,
Carved armchairs, and eaten chalks,
Missing brooms and dustpans and garbage cans and rugs
That show up in who knows where
Stolen by jani- we know who.

The witnesses and victims
To our random laughter (from some Chinese-looking girl’s corny joke).
Our random tears.
Our not so random learnings.
The pillars of our memories.

To the PF rooms of our third year:
The storage room turned gigantic garbage can and dressing room (maybe because ours keep being stolen)
The exploding socket causing sparks to fly (and us to fly away from it), and
The amazing “alambre” lock; who knows who installed (as if that could keep us away).
The earthquake resistant rooms would be missed.

To the New High School Building of our last years:
The kicked door (not our fault!), and cancerous blinds (like hairs falling after chemo),
The jigsaw floor (not sure if better than broken floorboards),
The “Halayan 2012”, and
The mind-boggling “no key needed” lockers.


The UTMT with its fair share of mango sentences,
The old guidance office now turned “tambayan”, and
The Computer lab with its fragile yellow chairs and bruised bums.

To Ibong Adarna plays, and the half cooked uncooked Teriyaki,
Generation X (and Generation NOW! and Generation Facebook),
Jai ** dances, and cheerleading,
Kalagon Kamo Namon,
And Mickey Mickey Mouse Kabit-bintana memories.

To the NikJep Tandem,
Kanlaon Boys Behind the Flowers,
D.H.A.I.N.G. (not sure if they remember this),
Fred vs Gino version
And DewBheRhieTart.

Keep the volcanoes of memories burning.

To blue paint, and blue shirts,
And Geometry teaching us
“There are a lot of solutions to a problem.
We just have to find one that suits us.”

To saying “***”,
And cooking imbutido.
And wearing (for some designing) reduced,
Reused, recycled clothing.
And dissecting.
And parrot-Filipino teachers (she gave me P30 for load though).

Keep the river of rumination flowing.

To being scared of one whole sheet of paper,
Two becoming one,
Party rocking to make up for the tears,
And knowing we should have won.

To the hand sanitizer girls,
The Cream-o-holics,
The Canterbury Crusaders,
The Valenciana eaters.

May our tree of friendship continue growing.

To our winnings!

The glow in the dark madness,
The Lakan at Mutya clutch-heart-moments,
The Sports Fest *******,
Basketball girls’ coronation!

To the fieldtrips and failed trips,
To air conditioned crammings,
And space and time bending
To comparing notes (and sometimes other things)
Copying notes, sometimes photocopying
(Not Xeroxing)
Sharing words, phrases, sentences
And giving pictures (via Bluetooth).

May you keep walking on the right direction,

To the expectations achived,
Broken, overtaken.
All the skepticism,
Constructive criticism.

All of it.

The in-your-face-we-did-it-baby-
We-are-awesome-you-can’t-bring-us-do­wn-
Coz-we-rise-back-up-attitude.

To Arielle
And Mhae

To Amica
Marie
Narzcisa
Cyan
Fred
Theo
Alvinson
Anthony
Faith
Karmil­la
Matt
Jeffson
Lourince

To Carolyn

To Makayla

To the thirty-five castaways in this room
The thirty-five castaways who struggled
The thirty-five castaways who persevered
The thirty-five castaways who fought, cried, made up, laughed, shared, gave, back-stabbed, and front-stabbed, celebrated, suffered, passed
Thirty-five
Thirty-five castaways who loved,
Thirty-five

Thirty-five castaways who made it, who did it.

To Nikki
Hazel
Alyssa
Gef
Veni
Alex
Jaykee
Bernard
Myra
Vince
Chanta­lle
Josen
Jerian
Shaira
J
Uriah
Ihra
Renz
Bless
Steffany
Angel
Fl­orey
Bernadine
Antonette
Rency
Owen
Majah
Gino
Marcelo
Ney
Keith
­Joselle
And Jessa,

We did it guys.
We really did.
TO MY CLASSMATES (IV-ILAWOD)
So many private jokes and inside thoughts. So many.
We were separated by thousands of miles,
But all I wanna see is your smile.
I just wanted to hold your hands,
But it'll worth thousands of grands.

The most important is
I can love you overseas
Yet you're still making my knees weak
Because it represents, the trust and love we seek.

- Jessa Saquin
We were separated by thousands of miles
But all I wanna see is your smile

I just wanted to hold your hands
But I'll worth thousands of grands

The most important is
I can love you overseas
Yet you're still making my knees weak
Because that's represent
the trust and love we seek.

- Jessa Saquin
Jessa Jan 2017
I worship your ghost
And I look for your shadow
But I've forgotten
That I'm the phantom
Running along the corridor
Searching.....
For my broken heart
That you keep in a jar
Too many pieces
Of bleeding love
You stored
Too many bottles of life
You've ripped out
Where's mine?!
I fall down to the floor
Drowning with frustration
Choked with anger
Knowing......
I'm just another additional art
Of the broken heart you've collected

-Jessa
Tik tok tik tok
I know it's been a long time
But I'm still waiting for you to arrive

Tik tok tik tok
It's already late,
Still haven't seen your shadows
or any noises you make

Tik tok tik tok
The air seems to be so cold
Now I can hear something breaking,
And a familiar tearing sound.

The sound of a heart that hoped

- Jessa Saquin
English is not my native language, if I wrote something wrong let me know. Thanks
Me and You

Me and you,
wild and young
stitching our veins to bonds
Turn this friendships for life and beyond

Cuts and wounds
I Sense the pain
So We Let it rain
Mouth speak the words
Heart collects the ache
Didn't mind to break the chain
So our Trust will gain

Speak my little nightingale
Freed me from my jail
Stuck in a dark opaque road
Buddy that ain't no fairytale

You have a hallowed out heart
Been hurt but it's hopeless
Darkness caving inside your soul
Seemingly blinding the best part
That nobody saw

- Jessa M. Saquin
I'm feeling so numb
Tears coming out
And it's falling on the ground

My heart that's whole
Been shattered to pieces
Trying to put it together but it won't

Memories from the past
Caving in, flashing back
Making me weak and drown

I am a beautiful rose
Rip me off
I'm full with thorns

- Jessa Saquin
Not the best but I tried to pour myself in it.
Me
ME

I guess nobody can see
The truth that describes me

I'm used to be abandoned ,
Tasted all the emptiness
I have felt the coldest breeze
That's why Im still the strongest

I'm used to be a shadow
Hiding in somebody's back
Following the misleading path,
Still no words coming out of my mouth
Coz I'm still the innocent little kid
From the past

- Jessa Saquin
I turn the shower on and let it cry with me

-Jessa M. Saquin
Jessa Jun 2018
I can't steal the star
From the sky
To furnish
Your dark canvas
Nor I can be
The moon
To shine within the darkness
But.....
I can be your diary
That holds your secrets
A presence
That will listen
To your devilish rhythm
No judgment
No execution
Just confessions
From heart to heart
To ease the burden
You carry inside
And.....
As the morning comes
I'll be vanished from your sight
But will forever stay
In your heart

-Jessa ©
Comparing them to us
Comparing us to them
Is not the right way to teach us
Instead you're just downgrading us

I wish you could say something great
Like a phrase full of possibilities
To make us learn from things around,
Not from what you thought
We should do to make us rise

No, I'm not happy
The way you treated us is bullsh!t
We do things you'd like us to do
Then leave us hanging in the middle of nowhere
Saying words full of wisdom
But the air is just the one who's listening

I wonder how we got this far?
I'm scared you'll eventually ask me
Something about the words I said from past
But how am I gonna remember those?
If only the one who cares is not even alive

Change the way you judge
Treat us equally and right
I'll do the favor and pay you back
With such a joy and pride

-Jessa Saquin
Jessa May 2018
I was smiling
With a crown on my head
I was pretty
And happiness
Shown in my eyes
But now....
There’s no more image
To define me
There’s no shape
To picture
How I looked like
Just dull colors
With torn paper
Stained with my tears
Unrecognizable.....
For I'm the faded portrait
That you used to paint
With love

-Jessa ©
Jessa May 2018
Such a wild world outside..... You said
Filled with danger
Yet....
I wanted to explore
For I knew
There would be pleasure too

Such a beautiful grief.... You said
When I walked away
But.....
What's the point to stay
When we could never
Start new

So keep those words silent
For we both knew
There’s not worth a fight
For something
That wasn't meant to be
For me and you
But remember on thing
That I've loved you
So true.....

-Jessa
Jessa May 2016
Lost
In the sea of regret
This burden of guilt
Keeps pulling.......
Me down under
I'm sinking
Into the abyss
Never once
I tried to fight the current
Nor to keep swimming
To the shore
For I'm ready
To be faded
Dwelling
With internal silence
I just let.....
The echo of my heartbeat
To be heard
Bit by bit
Slowly......
Til it stops
For eternity

-Jessa

— The End —