I used to stand in church
and close my eyes

waiting for a god to wash me over
with peace and love

and all i felt was

the tingling in my fingertips

the uncomfortable way my eyes were closed

the soft hairs tickling my temples

the pain resounding in my joints

and i didn't feel god
all i felt was the awkwardness of me

standing in a church

I had a dream that everything was on fire
and all I did was run
and scream and panic

I wasn't safe

we weren't safe

and the sky was that funny shade of purple and red

but there wasn't smoke

the fire just consumed
demolished the land like a wave
the embers shot into the sky
and the flames enveloped everything

I woke up shaking
terrified for my life

Countless times have people asked,
Why are we here?

And still
the universe refuses to answer,

never acknowledging the simplistic question
being shouted from tiny voices.

People pray to know
what their purpose is or if there is a purpose.

Demanding an answer to the misfortune that happens.

But the universe stares coldly at the world,
never uttering a single sound.

And why should it?

Why should such a grandiose power
answer people who will die in the blink of an eye
to never change or influence the course of life
and yet people continue to shout
asking and demanding for an answer or a sign.

Nothing changes and the world continues to spin.

The universe continues creating without reason.

Spawning life from the palm of its hand.

I keep hearing the church bells chime,
Please tell me it’s safe,
Tell me it’s time,

And we’re not out of the woods yet,
Our lives set to be brief,
All a fleeting vignette,

Give me your hand and together we’ll run,
I’ve been searching for the answer,
Dry you’re eyes, head for the sun,
Ignore their cries, I’ve got a gun,

I can’t face this world alone,
But everything changes,
We have no home.

The world isn’t here on the longest drive,
I still keep what I lose,
I still claim I’m alive,

I am nothing and you, my dear,
I would **** you just to keep you safe,
There is no one above, no one is here,
Hold tight love, and we’ll just disappear,

We are liars, we are immune,
Carry me in your arms,
I see the blood moon,

I keep hearing the church bells chime,
Please tell me it’s safe,
Tell me it’s time.

It stretches,
Blotting out the sun in jagged ribbons,
Standing below it, my shadow is lost,
Absorbed,
If it fell, so would I.

Creative Writing


Manchester uni,
Fifteen places, but that's it,
****, ****, ****, ****, ****.



The Fridge

I open the door,
But nothing has changed, no food,
My tears flow freely.




Fluffy

Fluffy the hamster,
In sawdust he hides plans for,
World *******.




Which is it

Some call my writing,
Insightful, to others it's,
Sociopathic.




2500 BC

I find peace in rain,
Ra, the Egyptian sun God,
Smites my insolence.




Look like Crab, Talk like People, Crab People, Crab People.

In the near future,
The crab people will rise up,
Crustacean war-fare.




Lunacy

Awake in my bed,
Pulled to open the window,
The moon calls for me




Lioness

Brave as a lion,
She does not show fear as she,
Devours her young.




97% Sure

Bodies in bin bags,
Powdered lime on window ledge,
Suspicious neighbour

There’s a burning in her eyes,
High reaching lace like a poison choker,
Hands around a swan’s throat,
She’s the type who would ****** the world,
Then break its neck,
But even then, she still spits poetry every time she speaks,
Everyone has their curses,
She hides hers in the darkness.

It's torture,
The way that he stalks her,
Mina, Mina,
Like some childish chant,
He calls her name,
We chant too,
Master, master, notice us,
Love us, want us, worship us,
Because we worship you,
And I have seen seasons pass in an unblinking eye,
How can I sleep when you are always awake?
Entertaining guests in the parlour room,
My pallor turns deathly when you speak her name,
Your next engagement is the chill in my tomb,
The fear I feel in her heartbeats makes my teeth hurt,
They turn into fangs with the bitterness I spit,
When you take her throat, I see red,
But I cannot admit these things to my absent soul,
By you I am vilified,
Like Christ I'd rather be crucified,
My wedding dress you nullified,
Let light stream in and burn me alive,
Burn me dead,
After aeons since the first I thought this bond was unbreakable,
1, 2, 3, women you have guided into your hell,
Still your thirst is unslakeable,
- But what did I expect?
Denn die Todten reiten schnell.

(Translation: Because the dead travel fast.)

He dashed across the beach,
The battery of guns barking like feral dogs.
Trudging through the red sand,
He looked left and right
As brothers fell one by one.
He woke up with a scream.
Never shall he forget 1944.

We are buried under the sand.
for us, no sun-kissed June day,
no moistness of a morning dew,
no soothing waves between our toes,
no jubilant trumpet to herald our return,
no voice to cheer freedoms new dawn,
we are forever buried under the sand.

© H V Swan