I don't know how to keep going on
I can't open up to anybody
They can get into some rooms
but I lock up parts of me
Isolated and dusty
I'm an island sinking into the depths
Of my sin, of my despair

I used to have a lot of friends
Now so very few are left
I hurt most of them right in the heart
I never intended to harm them
Haha, look at all the I's I have in this poem
Just so self-centered...
I never meant you any harm
Family matters the most to me
Then why do I take you for granted?

I'm sorry, I'm saying I'm sorry a lot lately
The weight of what I've lost is crushing me
Irony of something you don't have killing you
Hey, that's just how I'm going to die...

i am in my own wilderness
in my own territory...where,
my voice should rise above
my mountains and streams
my music should play in every corner
my thoughts should be transparent on the horizon,
everywhere........hidden, or otherwise
i should feel some kind of power,  
as queen of this jungle...

i am in my own kingdom,
i rule...
yet...i know, there's a Presence
something higher than me
patiently  watching me.......waiting,
for me to wake up...open my eyes,
and my mind......be enlightened,
and be able to genuflect...

a never ending want...for renown,
and control...reaches heights,
we always give importance, to
i.....me.....and myself....

i look up to the sky
recognizing One...ever present,
ever patient,
the Omnipotent one...
i bow my head,
i kneel
in humility...


Sally


Copyright February 18, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan