i want a fire escape love
i want a “feels like i’m in space” love
i want a looking around every crowd to see your sweat dribbled face love
i want a kiss in your car love
i want a hold passionately in the dark love
i want an “aim at your heart cause i know where you are” love
i want a forgiving love
i want a long living love
i want a “shower you in kisses cause this is what i’m giving” love
i want a meadow runner love
i want a midsummer love
i want a “lay in a field of flowers with the sky above, us under” love
i want a fully encapsulated love
i want a “you make me exasperated” love
i want a never cause arguments or leave me aggravated love
i want a strong love
i want a hold me while i’m crying hard love
i want a never let the sadness get too far love
i want a peaceful love
i want a hand that removes the letal love
i want a “give me medicine so i don’t become feeble” love
i want a free love
i want a frolic on the beach love
i want an “end of the week it’s you i want to see” love
and i want an everlasting love
i want a light up the shadows that are casting love
i want an “end of a disaster it’s you and i that are going to be lasting” love

i want you, love

I found my favorite part of life:
in all its randomness and uncertainties,
we always find our favorites along the way
and we personalize those for ourselves.

It's lovely; we take our own scraps from everything
-- may it be genre of movies, delicacy, fragrance, people --
piece them together,
then own a wholeness that we are.

Although, wholeness is just a euphoric concept;
Some people may feel it, many may be patiently building theirs.
Being complete is a great feeling but it's ceasing life.
Be quirky and wanting -- this is the beauty of life, after all.

I love listing my favorites as much as waiting for the new ones.

i get so lost in tomorrow
i keep forgetting
this is exactly what i wanted.
i become myself and become myself
til i blister -
it hurts but it's me.
i shed my skin, bite my tail,
and never learn.
i dig my nails under my face and
chase something i'll never earn.

I know they love my me

I just wish it was the same love that your supposed to have

I wish they tried

I wish they at least pretended to try

You didn’t give me a reason to write, you sat your words in my lap and I had no choice but to rearrange them.

1.
Silence
She opens her brown eyes wide
But shuts them tight quickly
Time passes
She tries again
This time squinting
She looks at the clock
So carefully arrange on the bedside table
7.03am

2.
Silence
The world is gently stirring
Soon people would be making their way to work
Like ants filing out of their nest to forage
Five minutes more pass
"I'll get up now" she thinks

3.
Silence
Broken by sudden noise
The air around crashes violently
Heat and noise invades her sanctuary
Explosion, the whole room rocks and shakes
The silence and dust

4.
Catherine Maddis was her name
It stated that upon her door beside the bell
Which lay across the floor in the hallway
Shouts, screams and pleas pierce the haunting silence
From beyond the hallway
Footsteps echo

5.
The dust settles
Smoke seeps into the room
All is still, the pleas fade
Slight movement, a spark of life
Her arm falls, a trickle of blood trails to her wrist
She looks so peaceful

6.
So quiet
Broken by the increasing sound of footsteps
Far, far, nearing, nearing, faster, faster
Faint echoes and scrambled words
Finally a peaceful silence remains
Fade away

My body lies crumbled on the sand,
Like a dry leaf in the glow of dawn;
A shrivelled voice inside my head whisper’s something
- I could not make it out at first
- But then the voice cleared it’s throat, then repeated :

Each day is not a chapter
But a mere sentence
In a library for unfinished books
Called Cemetery

It was then that I opened my eyes,
Knowing that this was not going to be a sunny day...

And at night I looked for solace in the darkness
But found only emptiness...