Let me disappear off these mortal maps
          and become a citizen of the void.

Let me revel in the peace of decay,
          as my bones lay in the comforting embrace
          of the silent earth.

Let the stars steal the light
          from my eyes
          so that, even in my absence,
          I can still guide you home.

Let me fall brokenly upon death's door
          and leave nothing but a disintegrating stone
          to claim my ashes.

I don't care how steep the price,
          please, just
                          let me leave and
                                     don't ask me to come back.

I told you that you should always be
thankful, things are getting
better, the process
is just rather slow,

and I told you that the proof lies
in the fact that you still have some
sanity left today,
if things weren't getting better,
then what else
could you be holding onto?

You did not, could not, and will not break me. Not now, Not ever. My body has housed your frigid frights for as long as I can recall. You've always found a way to make the world around me harsh and bitter. You've managed to get me down more times than I can count. Your goal remains the same: you've always wished to harden my heart. Well, now, its time for me to speak. my enemy friend, the tables have finally turned and the game has shifted to change. Despite your best efforts, I remain here. I remain fighting. I'm still moving mountains, I'm still causing storms. I'm still wreaking havoc. I still feel the sunshine on my skin. I still taste the rain when it pours. You tried to take me for dead, but you failed. With me against you, you'll never stand a chance. Give me the nasty and I will hand back gold. Today, I am reminded not only did you not shatter me, but you also made me untouchable. And for that, I thank you.

How can someone feel so alone
In a room full of people who love them
After being so happy
But only for just a second
And then to be helplessly falling
into an ever darkening hole
How?
To go through hell
To know others have been there too
To see constantly the impression of those who didn’t make it
The ones who couldn’t see so didn’t believe
But to know that your not the soul survivor
Yet still through the  torment and hope
The love and pain
The knowledge of knowing it’s worth it
The unwavering loyalty of love and  faith
How do I feel forgotten?

uninvited,
the tears stroll down my cheeks,

unintended,
the words come out all wrong,

underrated,
as your perspective of me isn’t my reality,

under construction,
is the fight against my tears,

understand,
that there is strength in vulnerability,

unravel,
your tears from their cells
and let go of the custody of pain.

The first breath I take
becomes the very first choice I make