You know
People are selfish
And they continue to hurt me
And you could say why not talk to them?
Explain or try?
There's never a point
In trying

They'll start denying
They'll start crying
To your face
While lying
Never making
A real effort
Never bothering
they can't afford
To change

Selfish in exchange
For my hurt feelings
Every single person.
I was born too kind
That's my issue
And it's not
Some kind of self pity
Tissue

It's true
I am not perfect
By no means
I've hurt others
Who didn't deserve it
I've made amends
I made effort
showed changed behavior
showed I savor
Making them
Feel better

Nobody
Does the same
Every one is to blame
Small or big
They hurt me
With a grin
They are selfish
Careless
And
Inconsiderate
I'm so tired
I might consider it

Being alone
Letting my anger show
Telling them all where
To ******* go
Letting go
For once
Not being nice
Being selfish
Like every other
*******
Guy

How can you all lie?
How can you all say you try?
And deny
With such a look
In your eye
You don't mean it
You cut me
I'm still bleeding

You are all wielding
The knife
This cold little life
You all play
Like it's a game
You're never to blame

Look inward
You selfish little flames
Burning out soon
Like a lying
Cheating groom
Figuring out
Your next
Move

Look inward
And see
Being selfish
acting carelessly
Gets you nowhere
Well maybe in this life
It'll get you somewhere
Desire is like fire you know
It burns out
Ashes are cold
And alone

So wherever you think you'll go
Remember you reap what you sow
You all told me I'm hard to hold
No,
I think it's you
You're all
Going to be
Lost in the cold

Never looking twice
At your own
Souls

Smell the forest’s breath
Sweet pinesap, hot brush, decay
The mountain’s flesh bleeds
sharp, fine dust; rocks clot the roads
Selfish love wounds its lover

Am I really self-centered?
Well, certainly am I not selfish
Always, do I help people in need
And you definitely cannot accuse me of greed
For my family, cousins and friends
My love and care has no end!

Am I really self-centred?
Not boasting, but am I kind
And loyal to a fault
Certainly, am I a compassionate adult
And do my best to empathise with people
As far as possible
Including even those who don't deserve it
Because, I know what it is like
To be ignored or laughed at
Hence, are there certain jokes
For which I do my best
To keep a poker face
Since, I do not appreciate insensitivity
After all, known am I, for my sensitivity!!

Am I really self-centred?
Yes, there are certain times
When I do tend to be self-obsessed
However, not too often do they come
In fact, often has my heart bled
Even when it was not required!!

Am I really self-centred?
Well, many a mistake have I made
However, always do I apologise
And give people space
I don't repeat my mistakes either
Because, truly do I care
For the wellbeing of others!!

Am I really self-centred?
Many a time, have I cried
Even for relatively small things
Doesn't that tell you something?
The fact that I care a lot
About other people's opinions
Should ideally show, that I am self-centred, NOT
In my life, have I learned a lot of lessons
And, over a period of time, changed for the better
Hope this at least provides the answer
To the question I have been repeatedly asking
Genuinely sorry am I, for all the time wasting
However, I am sure you would have understood by now
As to why and how
This issue means so much to me!!

perhaps i kept you like a secret, but
you spilled and overflowed into everything i did
lingered oh-so-noticeably, like an expensive perfume
perhaps you left me, but you also left your presence
like coffee stains on my journals, like, despite my wishes
all of your reserved enunciations and misspelled mannerisms
still shadow alongside every line that i reluctantly write
my parents say i am selfish, and perhaps they are right
my friends say this is hopeless, i hate that they're always right
perhaps i still sing about how we were "right person, wrong time"
perhaps i still write about a different us living out a different life
one where getting to love you is still a privilege of mine
perhaps i've finally stopped writing about the day we reunite
perhaps i can't move on, perhaps i lie, perhaps you'll understand
when i tell you over lunch, on the verge of tears, that i'm afraid
that i will suffer a case of unrequited love until the day that i die

Do you accept your family?
Despite the things they say to hurt you?
Do you turn the other cheek
Each time they blame and scold you?

Are you okay with no boundaries?
Never hearing a genuine "I'm sorry."
Do you just shrug things off cause,
"Hey, they're your family"

Or do you not accept that?
I've felt so conflicted lately
Because of family with no boundaries
Family that don't accept me, but want acceptance from me.

They always told me to say sorry as a child,
If I hurt someone else, I was wile.
Even as an adult, I'm always wrong
About others, the world and my own mental health.

I have to apologize in the end.
I have to pick up the phone to check in.
I have to put on an ever changing mask to ensure I won't be hurt again-
I try to explain it and once again, I'm a child.

I say "I" too much
I should ignore everything that offends me,
Assume the best of family because they're family.
I'm family but have to change and ignore my feelings for them to accept me.