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Sorelle 3h
I have pasta trauma
That’s the joke I tell
But it isn’t funny
It’s shorthand for the sickness
That never leaves
It’s why hunger feels safer than indulgence
Why I can starve myself with ease
But stumble over a plate of something rich
I am fluent in the language of deprivation
Fullness has always felt like arrogance
Nobody talks about the way shame
Ferments in the stomach
How it sits heavier than food ever could
Shame teaches you to apologize for existing
Before you even open your mouth
Shame teaches you to rehearse obedience
Until it becomes instinct
Hunger became my first addiction
The only sensation I could control
I didn’t know then that choosing not to eat
Was the closest thing to rebellion I had
-Sorelle
Sorelle 2d
Bone resembles glass in my chest
Remembering your weight
I folded the light inside my ribs
Until it snapped into a cage
The air is a mirror
And you are not reflected in it
Every corridor I walk hums
With the absence you carved
Trust rotted
Left fingerprints in my veins
I traced them with ice
Fingers frozen into claws
That caught nothing
The soft part of me
Was a city you razed
Now the rubble has its own pulse
And it beats without a sound
I wear the memory of you
Like a shard pressed into skin
And it hurts so precisely
That the wound is elegance
Nothing passes through
Nothing touches
Nothing bends
Even grief is a machine I dismantled
And stacked into neat towers
Inside the hollow of my throat
I do not bleed
I do not wait
I do not hope
Even fear folds into itself
Before it reaches me
Every echo of your voice
Is a fossil
Every warmth you left
Is a blueprint for winter
The world moves around me
And I am a cage that nobody owns
The frost in my lungs
Has learned its own gravity
You left nothing
I built everything from the absence
Ash is stronger than flesh
Silence sharper than a knife
And I will carry it all
Without ever opening the door Again
A fortress of ash and clawed bones
Nothing enters
Nothing leaves
Nothing survives unscathed
Sorelle 2d
You were my skin
My bones
My voice
Every crooked part I let you hold
"I'm gone"
Two words
A knife right through
With practiced precision
Do you know how heavy betrayal is
When it smells like trust?
I'm twisted around our memories
A coil of hands and voices
You left dangling midair
I can't breathe
I can't think
You're everywhere
Inside my chest
In my throat
Gnawing
Twisting
I wanted you to stay
I wanted the safe place
I built inside you to be real
I wanted you
I wanted you
I wanted you
I don't want another beginning
I don't want to fold myself
Into someone else's hands
Just to get shredded again
I wanted everything
And it broke me anyway
I hate it
The way I love you
The way I can’t erase you
The way it cost my sanity
While you carry nothing
I don’t want anyone else
I can’t
I won’t
I can’t go through this again
I won’t survive it
You’re gone
Every fiber aches for someone who
Walked away unscathed
The body screaming in silence
-Sorelle
that question,
aimed at someone else,
split me open.

half of these are about you.
but half of them — it’s all me.
the one who isn’t pretty.
the one who isn’t well.

i thought i knew
what the book meant.
i only wanted to hold
something that was mine.
but it grew teeth,
and turned into
a launch party,
a press release,
my words living
in other people’s minds.

all this weight,
kept hidden,
only allowing
my closest friends
to get a glimpse
at the truth behind the veil,
turned into
a doorway i couldn’t close.

have you not read her poetry?

i don’t want to be
polished anymore.

so read it.
it’s all me.
the way it always
should have been.
this one is about a conversation yesterday, that made me realise that the walls between my worlds are thinner than I thought. the fact that my community is starting to glimpse this raw, stripped, layered and honest side... there is a strange exposure in that. like people reading my diary but with my permission, except it still feels… naked.
I was born blank
a silence so wide it could swallow your name
before it ever left your mouth.
But then you came.
With shaking hands,
and ink that bled like memory.

You never introduced yourself.
Didn’t need to.
I knew you.
From the pauses between your lines,
from the weight of what you never wrote.
I felt you in every crossed-out word,
each accidental truth that spilled
before you could censor it.

They call me tool.
Instrument.
Stationery.
But I am anything but still.
Each stroke a confession,
each sentence a scream you whispered to me
because the world was too loud
or too cruel
to hear it.

I’ve tasted apologies
you couldn’t speak aloud.
Fantasies you’d never live.
Rage you feared would ruin you.
And love… so much love…
it shook my spine
as the ink curved its soft syllables
like a lovers name
spoken at a funeral.

I am the graveyard
of every version of you
you tried to bury.
I am the echo
of all the things
you dared to say
only when no one was listening.

Still,
you leave me in drawers,
drop me in bags,
forget me for months
until sorrow brings you back.
And I never mind.
I never mind.

Because I don’t need your thanks…
just your truth.

And when your hand trembles again,
I’ll be ready.
To carry the weight
you can’t bear alone.
To bleed,
so you don’t have to.
This poem gives voice to the quiet objects we use to express ourselves. Pens, papers, journals. Often overlooked, they witness our rawest moments. Grief, love, regret, and truth. This poem imagines their thoughts and feelings as they carry what we cannot say aloud, revealing that while we hold them in our hands, they are the ones truly holding us.
Sorelle Aug 23
I am not the girl I once was
She rotted in my ribcage before I even Knew how to grieve her
What remains is a howl that
Outlived its throat
I drag her like a corpse
Tied to my ankle
Praying she’ll twitch
Praying she’ll open her eyes and Forgive me for surviving wrong
I liked her better
She was honey before the swarm
She was soft
Unscarred
Still stupid enough to
Believe in forever
Now she’s bones in a closet
I keep polishing
Hoping to see her smile
In the reflection
But she never stood a chance
And neither did I
A body can survive long
After the person inside is gone
-Sorelle
Sorelle Aug 18
You learned how to starve me
Without letting me leave the table
You trained me to mistake
Famine for devotion
And still
I kept swallowing the scraps
You don't understand
What it means to hold a body that
Beats itself ****** trying to
Keep you alive inside of it
Stress turns muscle into glass
That can only be shattered
And I've been shattering
Everyday you've said "I don't know"
Do you know what it feels like
To drown upright in a room while
The person you love forgets you
Exist?
You talk about car oil
About money
About Ireland
Anything to avoid acknowledging
The countdown to my own collapse
The breaking body that comes
From holding on too long
-Sorelle
Sorelle Aug 13
The mushrooms in the forest
Know more about survival than me
They bloom in death
And wear it like velvet
I tried burying fear in the compost bin
It came back fragrant
Humming songs I hadn't written yet
There's glory in the stink of it
Mould carving frescoes in
Forgotten bread
Worms in the pit of the peach saying
"We were here first"
I think I love things more
Once they start falling apart
Makes them honest
Some things only tell the truth
Once they start to decay
-Sorelle
Sorelle Aug 12
My head says
"Leave before the floor disappears
Before you wake up
With nothing but splinters
And a mouth full of questions
You already know the answer to"
My heart says
"Wait
He’s just tired
He’s just busy
He’s just trying to find the words"
Hasn’t he had enough time?
“I don’t know”
It’s a language you’ve
Decided to live in
While I’m translating
Myself into nothing
My spine folds in
My ribs start counting the days
Without you in them
I try to remember your voice
Without the hesitation
But all I hear is the pause before
“I don’t know”
I’m holding the door open for
Someone who can’t even
Look at the room
I’m swallowing glass
Calling it patience
And every piece cuts deeper
When I tell myself you’re worth it
My head says
"This isn’t love anymore
This is erosion
This is weathering yourself down
To fit a space that’s already empty"
My heart says
"No
Remember his hands
Remember the way he made the world Small enough to hold
Remember how you’d do it all again"
I think about next week
The way you’ll look at me
And say it again
And my chest will cave
And my eyes will sting
And maybe that’s the last time
Or maybe I’ll let it be another

"I don’t know"

"I don’t know"

"I don’t know"

And it’s killing me that
Neither do you
The war between the head and the heart Has no winner
Only the wreckage of loving someone who Can’t say if they want to stay
-Sorelle
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