I go through the motions.
Each step I realize a bit of what everyone has already figured out billions of times over.
Each big interval in life, each trudge up the steps.
One after the other.
Connecting, dot to dot to dot to dot.
And for what?
To finish a painting with no end.
Maybe it completes itself at the very precipice of death.
But by then what is the point of its existence.
The fleeting beauty of a singular moment at the very end when it all clicks into place.
I've seen a thousand sun sets each a different form and hue.
I'm familiar with fleeting beauty and it doesn't serve a thing.
With all life has to offer why am I left hollow and wanting.
Will this biological nightmare ever end.
The sentience of swirling sticky chemicals is trick played on us all.

Finishings can be
The hardest part
In these final steps
All the craftsmanship
Has already occured
The finishings are
Mere inevitabilities

You must
Come to terms
With the idea that  
Perfection is a
Necessary goal
Precisely because
It is unattainable

You must reconcile
Yourself to failure

It's not perfect
You have to make
Your peace with that

How?
Well..
You lay out
Your tools
And you
start again

At the end of Nimmo's Pier
on a mid-week evening in July,
I gaze across the bay
with the city to my back.

To my left a heron potters about
in orange lamplight, from my right
two lads' conversation drifts
across the harbor docks,

Behind me the city thrums
with its mid-summer's nightlife.
My over-stimulation from three days
of intense work fades, my solemn thoughts

A flash of light upon the sky
and dinosaurs were gone.
In a universe that knew them not,
and held no memory to live on.

Of ourselves our human kind,
we think the universe holds us dear.
Through time and vastness of it all
so doubtful it knows we're here.

So many things come and gone
forever changing it still evolves.
Too short is our human existence
to see how all of this resolves.

We think our kind important
a central purpose for it all.
But the universal scale of things
serves to remind our place is small.

We will never know its purpose,
and may never know if there was plan.
But rest assured my fellow humans,
our path will be as the dinosaurs
when the universe recycles man.

@niamornimo

What do you do when you're at the edge
That place that you keep
Landing in...
Over and over as though a melody?.

When waves of emotions stir up
As tears fight,
Trying to escape my eye lids
Maybe wash off the pain in my eyes.

Religion, relationship, career, purpose
Nothing makes sense
I'm at a loss here
What's with me
Do I enjoy the roller coaster
And why is it always painful

This knife stuck in my
Heart
Stuck., as my molten blood
Burn it down,
Melting it from it's metallic state
Consumed completely into dark
The horror.
The voices, the mock,
The evil laugh,
Of him winning
Ha!...you're a seven remember
The mass that should
Predict the future behind you doesn't measure up,
Your face is pale,
Your eyes dilated,
Your knees sharp...decide whether you wanna be a girl coz ha!
Your short fat fingers ugh! Pathetic!
What was God even thinking trying to put up all this?
You're the definition of mess.

At that dark corner
I smiled,
I chuckled and in the middle of a chuckle  
I broke a tear
And laughed hysterically
For the sick joke.

Striding slowly to the mirror.
I see my reflection
I'm not sure what they saw
When they were saying all that
Coz I don't see it.
I see a reflection of God
Maker of the heavens and earth

Can't believe it broke my heart
Listening to their empty
Pouts
Maybe I forget how perfect
His work is
I hope I'll snap in time
To appreciate the rhythm
For the hallelujahs we to raise

Coz everything He created was good and perfect
So next time you
Find yourself doubting
His master piece
Consult The spirit that
Hovered over the waters
When the earth was with no form
Helping the Father complete His work
Which was affirmed good.
Not forgetting Him breathing life into
You and placing you
Where He called good and perfect.

Let His words flow out of you
Changing the slow rock rhythm that keeps living you hanging on the edge
And dance on those sharp
Thorns coz even though the snake
Bites you,

The poison won't harm you.
Maybe you're a small girl which
Is perfect coz you have a big God.