He.llo
The Days:
Tearing by,
It's? Terrifying. Me.

Everything; IT'S all just moving too fast...
"Wearing," My hearts on my knees,
Just* waiting for me to fall upon them.

it's all just happening far too quickly,
slow my everything.

Good.Bye

the brain and mind are not the same thing.

a brain floats, suspended,
down to the tips of my toes
and the blue rivers underneath my skin.

it is a box; simple tasks and quiet construction.

the mind has no such manuals.

it sees baboons in filtered skylights,
eyes as red as the blushing dawn,
gushing about over the hilltops of my shoulders.

it sees stop signs in the glass cracks
of my wooden closet door,
where the dark seeps around the green-light-go.

it sees fingertip to lip,
raccoons at rusty roadways,
Remus and Romulus locked in eternal combat;
preserved in the grains in the cherry tree trunk.

the brain is in the head,
but the mind is somewhere a little above;

hiding away in a doomsday bunker,
loud warnings burning the air,
bathed in cobwebs and blue lights.

away from people who haven’t quite learned,

that the brain and mind are not the same thing.

It's quite strange but nice
How it's odd and precise.

You can gun with a gun,
And a run can long run.

And an 'S' can turn laughter
To nothing short of slaughter.

If you're hot, they will drool
But be warm, and stay cool.

Head off with your head up
Face it head on, so heads up!

It is a deep and rich mine
For all to mine, yet mine.

I am more than my thoughts
More than the mountains that
Move in my mind.
The ones that shift over time
That wreck me
Pin me down
Until I cannot climb them anymore.
Who lit the fire in my heart?
To stay with you
To never be apart
To mend me to your wellbeing,
To **** me when you're not seeing.
Why do I hurt
Why do I stall
Why do I think I feel nothing at all?
When really I feel everything all at once.
So intensely that I cannot recall
Why we were arguing
And just that you're wrong.
And why did my father have to betray me?
Why did my mother never come to save me?
Why did I wait and never call out—
Why did I hinder and let myself down?
How can such trauma at such a young age
Tear me down and do nothing but degrade
The human I am.
The Human I’ve become.

I am human

But how can I be when I cannot feel safe
Without someone else beside me who stays.
I do love myself and sometimes I feel great
But I need you too for some help along the way.
I'm shuddering now at the thoughts in my head;
The ones who are happy but wishing I were dead.
Who knows me better than I know myself?
But somehow you come back to every thought that I have.
I can never escape this,
I can never replace this.

Of age old lighters
All vast and sundry
These are what make up
My father's hobby

Stuffed into his desk
Were such novelties
He could have boasted
Twas as large as he

Regular raven
With his jewelries
His full collection
I never did see

Only when he passed
Did I lay my eyes
On all the treasures
That drawer did hide

Every size and shape
Of lighter there is
I guarantee you
There was one of his

So much like his gauds
His wondrous person
Never came to light
Til he had passed on