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Lemon Black Apr 12
Over horizon, in the dark,
transient allure of shooting stars.
Still yet vibrant moments
of joint within and far.
A vastness seized with eyes.
A million years of travel stories,
narrated each, entwined,
it’s not the ears they reach, but mind,
recalled and forgotten as told.
I always feel I know them all,
not memorizing a single one.

A portal gate, wide opened
to connect past with present moments,
events long gone, foretelling return,
tethered together
with a radiant thread of light.
By courtesy of night sky
offered repast of boundless calmness.
I fear to call how troubled a soul
must have become,
to miss this invite for peace of mind
addressed to everyone.
It’s mesmerizing every time.
Light, bearing witness to things afar in space and time, covers distance at a speed only imagination can outpace. It reaches our eyes, fulfilling its journey by transitioning into a thought. But whose thought would that be? An innocent adolescent, genuinely deliberating on the weight of loss, an adult frustrated with how all this potential can be rejected, or maybe someone more mature, full of compassion, for the disabled and prevented from this experience, possibly even self? Is it a quiet time, when admiring night sky feels like a second nature, a busy epoch, too busy to bother, or the last living person, sustained on cosmic radiation for thousands of years, finally coming to a catharsis after millenia of tedious dwelling, realizing how everything is appreciated precisely because of its momentary shining? Perhaps all, at once, mesmerized jointly yet separated somehow. From the calmness they emerge and into the calmness dissipate. All thoughts, shooting stars. There’s no one to tell.
Falling Awake May 12
The conscious sea arrests hold of me,
Collective knowledge streams to my head,
With new eyes of three, I now can see,
I’m swimming in secrets of the dead.

A tideless sea, of consistency,
Not up nor down, behind or ahead,
All Life dissolved in pure unity,
All life woven from a single thread.

One drop is whole– The Entirety,
Reality fits on a pin’s head,
Uprooting all I thought there to be,
Replacing it with nothing instead.

Thoughts absent beyond duality,
And time crawls while elusive and sped,
All is formless unfettered and free,
And no words say what needs to be said.
Falling Awake May 10
The conscious sea arrests hold of me,
Collective knowledge streams to my head,
With new eyes of three, I now can see,
I’m swimming in secrets of the dead.

A tideless sea, of consistency,
Not up nor down, behind or ahead,
All Life dissolved in pure unity,
All life woven from a single thread.

One drop is whole– The Entirety,
Reality fits on a pin’s head,
Uprooting all I thought there to be,
Replacing it with nothing instead.

Thoughts absent beyond duality,
And time crawls while elusive and sped,
All is formless unfettered and free,
And no words say what needs to be said.
You look to be happy to escape the sadness
And seek inner peace to run from the madness
You sprint towards pleasure so pain will not reach you
You wish to be free so you don’t follow through
With any commitments, you don’t think that freedom
Is simply a tool to build your own kingdom
But all craftsmen know that to build anything
You take wood from the woods and you alchemise it
You may not want this, but this is where truth lies
When you reject half of life, the other half dies.
Just a bus poem
Billie Marie Dec 2024
You are everything. There isn't anywhere I can think
and imagine to go where you won't be.
Inescapable. Even when I imagine I've killed you,
I curse the name given to you. There I see you
in the profane words, in the rajas of violence.
Where can I go? What shape
can I take to hide from you?

I quiver on the edge of Love and Hate,
yearning with pain and in vain
for mercy forgot me and relief
is a distant mirage in an endless desert.

I grow to love the shiny polish
from grains of abrasive sand.
I wait through a coarse, dry world
for cool deluge transforming
in a blink everything from sand to sage,
and slowly back again.
Who can do this? Who
can harness a power
perceived in between
the friction of fire and air?
Its all part of grief, all part of life
Suffering and pain and strife
And smiles and comedy and fun
The stars, the moon, the skies and sun
They're all aspects of this cool "one"
That some have come to know as God
Or Nirvana, Universe
They are all words in the verse
Of seeing life through your own lens
There wouldn't be as much suspense
Without heavier words such as
The death of love or a sad pass
Poetry comes through the contrast
Of sea and stone and monotone
Is something no one should aim for
When reading about themselves,
If you're in pain, congratulate yourselves
You dont realize how much
Life you're living with the touch
Of grief that you're letting be seen
You've never been more akin
To love than now, the lines are full
Not half like the sun at noon

So while it hurts and brings much dread
I need to admit love is dead
And it is not coming back
At least not on the same track

And I'll be honest it's not fun,
Sometimes not even the least
But they don't call it "good grief"
For nothing...

Do they? =))

_M.
Billie Marie Oct 2024
I call to my own depths
and the love of my life appears
and manifests my long ago forgotten dream.

So now I live the dream
knowing it is illusive and imagined
and infused with the flavor of realness.
Yet, only I am real and it
is seen by no one that this too is
an unreality. Nothing sees itself.
Nothing yearns for nothing.
Blank void cries and laughs
at its own reflection and
make-believes its world to exist
only for its own amusement.

Come play, my only friend!
Go away then come once more
to me and let us dance and laugh
and sing again and again in being
all the varied endless waves.
Billie Marie Oct 2024
I wish there wasn't - but there is
I wondered when - when what couldn't
no one could see an inception or end point
if > opposites
how does one come to one? or none?
when they decipher this will they see
how they are the same and also opposites?
one ... none
will they it she he already know?
the big stupid open secret

She says, "Crash into me, baby, and let me crash into you."
and I possess nothing, least of all things, power.
I am not. She is - nothing other than she is.
All my good intentions go to diseased swine.
I am not - her wrath takes me from here to there
and calls it nowhere. I am tossed about,
no compass, no center to navigation.
She toys with my love and honest heart;
tests me with sharks and rattlers.
Why so harsh?

For pleasure and the peace to be ever sweeter.
For to end suffering and a beginning to nothing.
I am nothing and forever trying to be something.
What else can I be?
I see no boats rocking. The sea is glass.
Nothing is broken.
am i ee Feb 2023
sitting alone

surprises appear

fun ensues

wonder ensues

life, lessons..

so much

I’m not ready
to have you leave me

you have so much more

to teach me


I know your heart hurts
i know you are tired

I know your barrel is almost empty
but just don’t leave me now

I need you

and
i  think you need me now
too
life is sweet pain and sweet bliss
don't give up. it is delicious pain and joy
live it to the fullest
it is too short .. go for it
in all its manifestations;
am i ee Dec 2022
got myself a new boyfriend
turned out to be my twin

almost

never laughed so hard
cried so much

danced so long

moaned in ecstasy so many times
well there goes that vow of celibacy

re-entering this manifested existence
a little quiz from the absolute

7 years of silence and stillness and solitude
turned on its head

Oh the joy
the delicious pain of
feeling

duality
isn't it a hoot?

and now he is gone

where will this roller coaster end
this time?

will he ever reappear again?
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