You became their puppet,
Their personal one of a kind show,
You subconsciously accepted playing by their rules,
Because you were conditioned from a young age
To fear speaking up, that it often came with a danger.
You voiced out your thoughts and feelings only to be met with invalidation, anger, gaslighting, emotional immaturity
And toughening up this shell of a human being you were put in
So you learned to swallow your pain and emotions
Because it was safer for the child you once were.
You learned to walk on eggshells, to avoid conflicts,
You created a war within yourself to keep the peace,
You struggled and died in silence, always left alone
To pick up the pieces of the wreckage they leave behind
And try to put yourself back together one more time.
Stomping on your heart and calling it "love",
Humiliating, masking insults as jokes
And name-calling behind closed doors,
Chipping away at your self-worth and confidence,
Deflecting when called out on bad behavior,
Making you doubt yourself, sanity and reality.
But love doesn't hurt, love doesn't cost you your voice,
Love heals, love truly listens, love appreciates all of your angles,
Love acknowledges its imperfections,
Love creates a safe space that holds with understanding,
Love doesn't run away from accountability.
Love? doesn't blame others for its own wrong doings,
Love isn't complex, we make it out to be,
Love isn't shaped by trauma and unhealed wounds,
Love just exists, without conditions,
Love costs nothing, it wants your happiness,
Love protects, doesn't force or steal,
Love sets you free, doesn't keep a hold on you.
Love doesn't control, love isn't power,
Love isn't superior vs inferior,
Love doesn't compare or asks to be matched,
Love, loves..in all the ways it knows the pain
Of existing without it.
