What is this longing that i feel?
Is the moon getting older
or everyone around me bitter?
My heart is streched,
into millions of pieces
Unable to recognize what it's calling for.

Who do i talk to, when it feels the loneliest?
The house is getting cold,
my feet heavy.
It is creeping on me
How do you help,
how do you soothe
when you feel
the weight of the worried on your shoulders?


Do you ever feel the pain of your loved ones as your own?

I get you
we're one
I feel your essence
and you feel mine
and my loneliness
in crowded spaces
with eyes pretending
to understand my thinking
and my pain
and my mending
You get me
get my anger
and my shame
and my torment
and how everything hurts
my skin tense
like needles are stuck in it
and tearing it apart
and i think i exaggerate
and i make up things in my mind
to try and survive
all the horrible darkness
the average human knows
but you tell me
that it's fine
it is mine
I'll survive
day by day
step by step
and that this pain is real
though it can't be seen
and i tell myself that i fake it
but it causes me to cry
at random times at night
when all else is still
but all is blurry inside
and i get a sense of clarity
when i'm hurting
cause i'm trying
to make sense of my reality
and you get me
and it's alright
and we promise each other
we'll be fine

when we sit in the shade
from the burning sun on the
autumn afternoon, listening
to the children hunt for eggs,
all i can think is that you all
belong here.

i am the imposter, i can feel that they know. your jokes are all funny and i can't find the energy to laugh.

i don't want to be here, i hate 'family lunch'es, i hate pretending to be alright when i just want to sit in my room, alone.

family is always priority for me,
but i cannot place them in my life.
so we sit, laughing with all your loved ones,
and i pretend not to feel alone.

We often think strangers have,
The upper hand in crafting our pain,
We believe they feel no remorse,
For their cruel deeds.
But most times,
It’s the ones closest to us,
Who recklessly hurt us,
Without feeling any guilt.