Do what I want...
Oh, what a taunt.
I wish I could.
There's no way I should.

I want to go home
I want to write a book
Sit back on memory foam
In a cozy little nook.

To stay home with my kids
And my wonderful wife
To shut my eyelids
And sleep without strife

I want to talk to the people
Who wander my mind
To sit and slowly pull
And scribe as stories unwind

For my family, I want to care
To give them all they need
And always be there
So they've lives they want to lead.

I just want to function
To not give my all
Just to end in destruction
Not to fall and fall and fall

I want to like the man in the mirror
To not see myself with disgust,
As something lowly, inferior.
I want to be worth your trust

Do what I want...
Oh, what a taunt.
Maybe I should,
But there's no way I could.

in the space between us
everything connects me to you
each infinitesimal atom a bridge

the same way
I could feel your skin
and we'd never touch

If it is a dream
And not real,
Then I too,
Am a shadow
Behind closed eyes.
                                       But,
                                                   If it is reality
                                                   And true as the sun,
                                                   Then I too,
                                                   Am a glimmer
                                                   Behind eager eyes.

You just have that effect on me
where you get into every inch,
fill every cell,
until you are perfectly everywhere

Until all I say is you,
until your taste,
your cool tongue against mine,
is all I can breathe

Until I can't see,
blinded by the spark in your blue eyes,
making everything turn into your color

Until my words of you
are just pouring out of my fingers,
trying to grasp as I write you down

And you even make me wake up
with your name ringing in my head,
as if I've been calling for you all night

And I know our memories back and forth,
I've visited them so often that they are tattooed across my mind,
carved into my chest,
so even my heart knows when to skip that beat

But it just gets hollow,
filling myself up with old memories,
so torn and tormented,
so far away from you

Like I'm living out of old air,
to thin to give any real release
but to lightheaded to stop

I've written a hundred books in my mind,
longed thousands of nights,
dreamt a million days away
and yet, you are not here

a lot could happen
in the months within a year.
and a lot could happen
in the weeks within a month.
a lot could still happen
in the days within a week.
and lot could happen
in the hours within a day.
if a lot could happen
in the minutes within an hour,
then maybe a lot could still happen
in the seconds within a minute.
if maybe within the gaps
between those seconds
you could still find time
to think about me again,
maybe a second is all
that i could ever need.
A second could be enough.

What is there to say?

Whirling in the depths, the sea –


roars with my yearning.

what keeps you free?
i know you very well
but what makes you feel
as if you’re in hell?

is it the trepidation
of your minds’ own creation
to fuel you further to
your true disposition
of what you want?

the concupiscence for me
beaming throughout the space where you live
inside this biosphere of my heart
where you lie barren

fermenting your own despair
i truly appreciate your time
can you continue to only be mine?

it’s selfish
but this world is too cruel for your beauty
shielding you has become my duty
god cannot take me from you