#hopeless poems on Hello Poetry

Dead Sep 2020

The skies have rendered everything a pale grey.
Not used to our own thoughts, the screams still ring in our ears.
We are all wandering under the ash rain, eyes low.
Nothing heard, nothing said.
There’s not much of us left, not much of anything.
After this agony, where will we go?

When these wounds heal, and the skies finally clear.

All we will have is a wasteland.

#dead #wasteland #the #world #earth #apocalypse #hopeless #lost #prayer #help

Dead Sep 2020

Do you miss me?

I wonder if god is watching me.
I wonder what he thinks of my choices.
At least I’m plastering ink over my scars, at least this pain is creative.
At least I stay away from the bottles and the pills lately, at least my monsters and me share a clear head now.
I could have been dead by now, wouldn’t have changed much to you.
You only answer my screams with silence, bouncing wall to wall. Deafening.
You, this mythical engineer.
You bringer of life, orchestrator of pain.
You left me, clawing, moaning, bleeding.
You could have saved me.

I wonder if god ever watches me, I wonder if he’s proud of me.

#religion #god #faith #loss #hopeless #depression #heaven #hell #dead

tc Sep 2020

picasso

i melt my skin into bath bombs
fill the tub like water with all the parts i want to wash away
i am trying to cleanse my pores
become sweet like cinnamon air in a quaint bakery, all flowers
and as the rain smeared, the lights bled like an oil painting in the reflection and i stopped to stare at myself in the window
i am not a work of picasso
i am a product of a loveless marriage
i am a representation of how passion can become possession
i retain memories within me that make my brain swell and i feel my heart beat in my glands
i am trying to master sensitivity so i can be more thoughtful when i explain to you why i am the way that i am, so that i don’t upset you
i don’t think there’s blood within me
my organs are mechanic
i am made of pure electricity and too much frequency rests in my palms, scattered like shattered glass and convulsing through me
i am trying to cleanse my pores
smell doughnuts at the seaside instead of rotting flesh
nothing about this is luxurious
i try to be elegant
as held together as woven ivy
i am more graveyard
more derelict detachment
i stare at a reflection in a quaint bakery window
i hope one day i merge with the lights on the pathway and become all oil painting all flowers all sweet like cinnamon.

#hope #change #reflection #personal #life #painting #sadness #depression #hopeless #future

Meraki Sep 2020

Happiness

Outside I’m a bright,
golden ray of happiness,
living a life sweeter than a sʻmore.
Cheerful family of four,
laughter roaring through the house,
life filled with dreams coming true.

Yet I can hardly bear to face another day.
My only desire is nothing,
complete silence.

I wouldn’t have to pretend to feel loved,
I wouldn’t have to pretend to be happy,
I wouldn’t have to pretend to have hope,
I wouldn’t have to pretend anymore.

I wouldn’t have to feel cold, wet
tears dripping down my face
in the middle of the night,
As I gasp for air,
In my sinking pit of despair.

Complete silence is what I ask.
Void of sound,
Drifting through the starlit skies,
Finally being able to go home
To Father.

Why do I stay?
Why do I live?
Why don’t I give up?
Why don’t I die?

Reasons to stay outweigh
Reasons to go,
But one day that’s not going
To be enough.

The stench of lies,
Of smoke,
Rushes to my head.
Silver becomes red.

Attempts to feel,
Something, anything.
Futile in the end.

Only way for happiness is
A bottle of complete silence
Which comes with
the price of one’s life.

#pills #depression #suicide #hopeless

Lu Wilson Sep 2020

Utterly absurd

History stands still, but time seems to be flying
Our world is selling a product and I'm not buying

Panic, hate and fear knocking to serve at my door
Watching others with plates out asking for more

People hungry for sorrow and thirsty for pain
Kindness, light and sensibilities lay quietly slain

The earth is on fire in every sense of the word
No answers or hope just the utterly absurd

This year is hell. There seems to be no end in sight. It's feel like a dream so much that has happened in 2020. So much rhetoric and so much hate. No end in sight.

#2020 #sadness #hate #pandemic #hope #hopeless #election #noleadership #fires #pain

lattesandpokez Sep 2020

numb

they say, too much of anything is bad for you.

so when i realized i have been sad for too much and it slowly destroyed me,
i picked up my guitar, belted out every song i knew.

because, too much of anything is bad for me, right?
too much emotions is bad for me.

they say, get a healthy coping mechanism.

so i did
when i realized i have been sad for too much and it slowly destroyed me,
i picked up my guitar, belted out every song i knew.

because too much of anything is bad for me, right?
too much guitar developed calluses on my fingertips.

now that, should be a warning enough.

they say, too much of anything is bad for you

so when i realized i have been sad for too much and it slowly destroyed me,
i picked up my guitar, belted out every song that i knew.

but i forgot that too much of anything is bad for me.

until i finally realized,
all the songs lost its meaning,
and all there is to feel,
is my sadness.

but you know what they say, too much of anything is bad for you
but this time, i can not prevent it

so when i realized i have been sad for too much and it slowly destroyed me,
i surrendered

idk what i'm trying to say here. i'm sad. nothing works.

#sadness #grief #meaning #emotions #sad #hopeless

Pauvel Jétha Sep 2020

Silence

Wonders never happened.
Laughs have diminished.
The sun is still shining,
But night has crept in.

Love has eluded,
Hope for it dwindled.
The arms that were open
Never closed in an embrace.

Faith and I,
Went our separate ways.
The life that was to be -
Have I lost it forever?

In a hurricane of sounds,
Amidst people living and loving,
With broken words in my throat,
All for me is silence.

#silence #sadness #depression #faithlessness #unbelief #hopeless