he grew
in the shadow’s cradle
where light was a stranger
and silence spoke in thunder.

among the red flames,
he stood
a dark flame itself,
unyielding,
sharp as obsidian.

not softer,
not less
but forged
from the stillness
between storms.

his roots drank from broken earth,
his veins held stories
etched in crimson glass,
fractured but gleaming
a quiet war
etched beneath his skin.

they called him wild,
a thorn without a rose,
but he was more
a sentinel of shadows,
a keeper of scars,
a guardian of unseen battles.

he bled without sound,
he bore his fractures
like medals of fire
each shard a testament
to survival,
each wound a map
of the battles he won
without surrender.

he did not seek to belong,
only to endure,
to thrive
where others would break,
to bloom
like the black thorn
that thrives
in the night’s embrace.

Does God listen when we pray?
Or when we speak does He turn away?

When life is tough, is it His doing?
Is He putting us through a test to reveal our loyalness?

Lost in this world with no guidance.
I need help, where can I find it?

My faith is strong, though sometimes rough..
I pray to God, but is it enough?

I know I stray away at times.
But I beg for forgiveness, of this heart of mine.

Sometimes I wonder, why is it me?
When I am going through tragedy.

But then I remember, all He's done.
Even sacrificed his only begotten Son.

No matter what I go through,
I know He's with me, every step of the way.

I thank you God, for all you do.
Even when my heart strays from You.

My heart is yours, forever more
Till the day I'm at your door.

I keep on waiting,
For hours that feel endless,
Just to hear his voice,
To tell him about my day,
To feel like I matter.

But he seemed distant,
Uninterested.
Our conversations faded
Until they barely existed.
He didn’t care—
At least, not the way I did.

And my heart,
It broke silently,
Into thousands of pieces
Scattered in places he'll never see.

I lie awake wondering:
What if he never cared?
What if I was never the one?
Was I ever enough?
Did I overreact?
Did I ruin it?
Maybe it was all my fault.

These thoughts crawl in,
Late at night,
Until I break down,
Until breathing feels like a burden,
And every fight replays
With me as the villain.

you told me of who created the cosmos
heaven, earth, both with no breath lost
his right man born 'tween stone worshippers
his teachings bores wisdom within

touch my head on this earth for You
at least 5 times a day,
help my brothers and sisters of god
to be a good man,

what if I only did the latter
and also to those who don't believe in You
does it really matter?
the address the prayers point to?

but it did to you, mom
ordained since birth in His ways
to be good, first and foremost
and I did, just wasn't in His ways

so it's not a detriment, to you
but a commitment, to me
to be good in spite of it
and a compliment, to us

so know you did well
so much so that,
I catch myself thinking,
if even He,
thinks I'm good too.

I wish he could know
What I'm too scared to show.
I wish he could see
Just how much he means to me.
I wish he could tell
That I know him so well.
I wish he could feel
My love that is real.
I wish he could hear
The things that I fear
About him never knowing
That my love for him is growing.

im chasing the attention you give me
beg for it, desperate for the warmth you offer
your smile makes me feel like im facing the sun
and i've been in the cold for so long

you look at me as if i've put the stars in the sky
trace my fingers in empty moments
admire me when i look away
yet my brain knows to be cautious,
despite all the green flags and the soft words
im scared to be loved

but i want to be loved by you.

You were the cigarette i couldn't quit–
Sweet poison on my lips
Slow death disguised as desire