And only ever that

Oh this twinkling city.
“Come on over --
We have the night life.”

My car is two blocks away, just past,
just past these neon lights now.
Just past these long-legged, bustiered signs.
Come here missy, come in.
Come on, hon - you want to dance?
We need girls to dance.

Walk on, purse-clutching city woman.

Oh this dancing city
Oh this shattered city.

Bullying is not confidence
Deceiving is not intelligence
Lying is not outwitting
Disparaging is not bravery
Shouting is not a better way to be heard
Preaching is not the equivalent to love and harmony

Kindness and compassion
Are not words they are actions

Those of deceit
Often delete and retreat

And the worst thing about it
Was that despite what I told myself
I still considered it my fault
I fell so easily for those disgusting excuses
Men use to justify harm done to women

I thought of how I answered the call
Forever worried about how the voice
I use on the phone just to sound pleasant
Could be misconstrued to be
"a ******* operator's voice"

The truth is
It didn't matter what I said
Or how I said it
Nothing I did would deflect the abuse
Because that decision was made
Outside of my control

(but nothing I tell myself will stop the pain)

You go snake
Spit your ***** venom
All over the room
Staged performance
With puppets
You aren’t yet tired
Playing
So much effort to destroy
The ground I send on
Seeking my exposed vulnerabilities
With your cold eyes
Sore for misery
Forgive me snake
I have a yawn and a laugh
To give but not to share
My face perfectly relaxed
As I imagine
Your anihilation.

he didn't hear me begging him to stop.
me too- he didn't feel me push him away.
me too- his words stung with guilt,
me too- he made me think everything was my fault.
me too- he choked me as I dug my nails in his skin,
me too- he didn't stop,
me too- he choked me until I passed out.
me too- he manipulated me into saying yes.
me too- he forced me to say yes for his own reasons,
me too- he didn't want to hear no
me too- he didn't want another girl to tell him no.
me too- he always told me I wasn't good enough.
me too- he would tell me all the things wrong with my body,
me too- he thought I would want to try harder to be better.
me too- he expected telling me I had "DSL" was romantic.
me too- he thought touching me without consent was ok.
me too- he thought he could get away with ****,
me too- he thought correctly.
me too-
he believes he has done nothing wrong.

Use canned spaghetti as thread to stitch together the frayed edge of your t-shirt. Use your t-shirt to show how you’re the coolest most-hippest, most up with the kids kid there is. Where’d you get that shirt? Online.

Bop your head to the music so they know you know this song. Harder or they won’t see you. That’s not hard enough. Neck snap! Yeah, right there. Hold still while I take a photo. Do you mind if I make this my cover photo?

Take a selfie of you crying in the bathroom and hashtag it. Snapchat it to your local MP so they know how you feel - be sure to use an emoji. #studentdebt Tears streaming down your face. (If it’s a hashtag it’s easier to emotionally process.) #policebrutality #throwbackthursday #massincaceration It’s a good thing there’s emojis for black people now. Look at how far we’ve come!

#nomakeup #vegan #crueltyfree #childslavelabour #iwokeuplikethis #campusrape #notallmen #yesallwomen #freethenipple #2k16 #mentalhealthcuts #stopkillingtranswomen #waterislife #standwithstandingrock

Have you followed Human Rights on Facebook? It’s the only way to get them. Have you seen the Ted Talk about it? In just 20 minutes you’ll know everything there is know about it.

Sorry. You don’t seem like you’re focused. You’re thirsty? Let me make you a smoothie.
I’ll put the chocolate bar in the blender whole, leave the wrapper on. Taste the tinfoil and the plastic. Eat the barcode, become the product. That’s modern life.

Don’t take out the hair or the fingernail or the Band-Aid. Don’t hide from the human components of the production line that made this Kit-Kat possible for you, kid. That’s modern life.

Go to the voting booth, refuse to choose between the diversity of 50 versions of the same smiling white man. Scrawl: **** these ******! (have no faith in none of them) That’s modern life.

With jittering teeth and goosebumps, put your toaster in the sink. Overflow it with water. You will only need a fork to get warm. Electrocution is the most economical form of heating. Be Energywise. That’s modern life.

Puff marijuana smoke through the bars into the brown faces of those who were incarcerated for doing what you freely do now. That’s modern life.

Burn your eyes on the screen. But before you do, memorise the 0800 number for the optometrist.

Post your suicide note on YikYak to save paper. No-one likes reading hard copies these days anyways. #papercuts #selfharm

Search for motivation on EBay. If you’re lucky it’ll have free shipping and arrive in 1-5 business days.

Snapchat your friend’s words of encouragement, God knows they’ve seen enough dickpics.

Take a chicken to KFC and tell them you’re sorry.

Get in the cars of the men who yell “Hey baby!”. They’ll be so surprised they wont know what to do next.

Swap your woman-chest with a man-chest and see if your ******* are still illegal.

Drive through town throwing dirt with one hand and seeds in the other. Maybe, if you do it long enough this claustrophobic concrete will be gone.

Bleed on every seat until the government pays for menstrual products.

Train seagulls to throw YOU chips.

**** a woman and a man simultaneously, so that you can be sure everyone knows you’re bisexual.

Blockade inaccessible buildings with piles of wheelchairs.

Grab time by the fabric and rip it, cuz we all know rips look really punk, and all you really are is just some young punk.