turns out memories
aren't just silly dreams.

feels like yesterday,
before we went our
separate ways,

regrets,
words i thought
i'd never say

broken at every turn,
and lost along the way.

then just like the time
slips idly by,

i watched you
slip away, memories
of yesterday, fading into
the sun.

Just like photographs,
still frames in my head,
it's hard to move forward
when i have so much to say.

but at least i can say,
i've had a good run
instead.

turns out memories
aren't just silly dreams

feels like yesterday,
before we went our
separate ways

and i know
mistakes were made
along the way.

but in order
to move forward in
life,

i know there's
hurt somewhere between
yesterday and today.

it's not over at 30,
and i know my time
isn't done.

love comes and goes,
but i don't want to be
the one who got away

when i think
i may have finally
found the one.

turns out memories,
aren't just silly dreams

and i know we've
gone our separate ways

but just like how time
moves forward, i know

that new memories
can be made
along the way.

Heartstrings frayed and  
weathered.

Scarred, and afraid
to weather the storms.

But to heal,  
you know you’ve got to swim
to better days ahead.

All you can do
is all you can,

A push comes to
shove,  

and within time,
the feeling of
love

saves you from  
being buried within.

The caterpillar marches
Munching from leaf to leaf to leaf
He doesn’t know where he’s going
He doesn’t know where he’s been
He only knows the munching
The hunger in his gut
The fire in his belly
Antennae pointing up
Vigilant for predators
Water and leaves
He doesn’t know where he’s going
It matters not where he’s been

The caterpillar weaves
Instinctively without knowing
Why he must, but weaves he does
A cocoon for the growing
The caterpillar digests himself
Dissolving into soup
Becoming a pod of pain and tears
And caterpillar goop
Alone for weeks he suffers
Reconfiguring
His whole body becoming
A new kind of being

No idea what he’s becoming
No idea what’s in store
Suddenly caterpillar emerges
More beautiful than before
Stronger and more delicate
Lighter than the air
Ready for love and lofty height
A sight beautiful and rare
The butterfly does not look back
To the caterpillar he was
The butterfly flies forward
Embracing whatever comes

Keep the focus.
There is, more to this
And more than this.
Keep moving forward

Snow falls heavy on head of Earth
Weight added as this mighty rock spins
Might be spring according to the calendar
Icy powder covers the dancing tree limbs
March choreographing slow routine
Time taken to feel sun's warm glow
Movements meticulously placed
We patiently wait for greenery to grow
Each morning rises giving way to new roots
Relying on heat that stays out of sight
Looking forward to the colorful weeks ahead
Good weather to melt the frozen cloak of white

I take the same and different ways
returning to these streets I thought I knew.
Scent memories come in warm layers,
comforting until they cling, and I think
too long about the shadows
stretching behind, before
the city lights became so familiar, but
clarity depends on distance, on when
in motion the lines converge
and the shapes fade to almost nothing,
only to merge and re-emerge
with each step forward, back to you.

Up or deep down
which way is that
bedewed primrose path
the way forward?

Even the last breakthrough day
on the way heaven lingers
on sundried rosy evening clouds
let alone the roses that
never leave the ground.

I wish apologies were rewinds
that could go back to that place in time.
& make everything alright.

To go back to that kiss,
In your arms,
And feel blanketed in your warmth...

But instead I think back to that point in time,
Where unfortunately there is no rewind.
Forgiveness is in my heart,
But it also remembers to tread lightly.
It makes me think.

Think about you.
Think about me.
Think about the way things used to be.

I wish apologies could take it all back,
but in reality there are no rewinds.
Thankfully,
Things continuously move forward.
Even with trepedity.

Tall glass towers; on mountains of golden lakes.
An island of ten million dreams; blinded by the lights
of life. Heaven is a time like no other, as nothing has
an end. But all of it's residents have met their end.

Phased by the breath of tens of labours; the works of my
hands. I built glass memories, so fragile of remembering a
tragic past. All that is wasted; wasting away in thoughts.
****** as my hairs in the morning. Some on my neck, of
having their rest on my pillowcases.

A heavy throat, and it's husky voice. Mmh mmh; clearing it
to speak into a day. This morning is a timeless piece of whisky;
strong as the first swallow of belief.

Do I...

believe of any goodness ahead of me for today? A chance of better wealth to add some weight to a wallet? Meeting my potential love; as they're waiting out there?

But when, and how far are all of these things?

Who are the fools to know; all of the wisdom of ancestors
of where they should go? My forefathers have been at this place before. I do suppose; that I am progresses living words.

Onwards, forward, towards, heading, advances, going to
the places of what progress asks of me to go.

i don’t know how to get ahold of you.
when you zone out and i see you’re not okay.
i wish that i can help you when your mind goes blank.
seems like your mind been racing a lot these days.

other days, i don’t know how to get ahold of you.
when i say “i love you”, but you don’t believe me.
feels like it causes you to double-think twice about me.
past life is in your current life, making you run from me.

tonight- i think we need to be more patient
tonight- i just want to be in your presence
tonight- coming to a realization
love can’t be this dangerous
this love can’t be this dangerous

this not good for you
this is not good for you
i can’t take your heart for granted
hope you understand where i stand and
this not good for you
this is not good for you
i can’t take your heart for granted
hope you understand where i stand on this