Every end makes a way to start with something new
Every new start promises something different,
something new,
yet something very much interesting raising the level of expectations with regards to what was set as prior.
Also otherwise expectations have always remained a part of life that has always got good,
if not great results,
despite the different inputs and many different outcomes,
which have been dealt with and faced from time to time,
since prior.

My back is straight
when the marked test lands in front of me;
I got an A.
-obviously-

Addy always gets an A
She’s so perfect.
How does she do it?

I’ll answer that question.
She eats the words
‘you’re so ****’
every morning, just before running to school.

Then, at dinner
She is rewarded
with a bruise.
One for every day of the week.

My face is perfectly straight
When the marked test lands in front of me.
One mark off.
-I got a Well done-*

She basically does everything right.
I bet her family is real proud.
She must get some real respect.*

Yeah, real proud.
Which was why,
Her parents had an argument.
Her mum had chosen the tuition.
So her dad screamed did his voice was bare.
That it was mum’s and Addy’s fault she ‘failed’ that test.
It was their fault that they didn’t care

So if I was to teach a lesson
I beg for you to not compare
The perfectionism of a girl so bright
You don’t know what happens to her; you don’t know what happens out there

When the only snow you see in December is in your snow globe
When the only Christmas spirit is alcohol
When you've filled up on too much on Christmas food
and the super market cashier is being rude
When your turkey won't cook
and kids and toys are making too much noise
and the adult boys are out for the count after eating
and your so tired you feel like you've taken a beating
when Christmas telly is all repeats
and you are the only person in the street without decorations
and you are left alone to make preparations for the big day.
When you've got a stinking man flue cold that won't go away
and the smell of cold Brussel sprouts is like mould
and you've been told that this Christmas hasn't met expectations
and the box of chocolate sensations has all gone
Remember it's one day and it'll all too soon be over.

We live by the words "be perfect don't fail"
About us we should see what that reveals
We obsess over numbers on a scale
Expectations are set by these ideals

When did portion sizes become so small
It's hard to think of but needs to be said
Put my health first vs. do I care at all
A constant battle inside of my head

Strength and will-power silence the voices
My body shaming can finally stop
Pushing myself to make the right choices
In this battle I will come out on top

Because the exact moment I give in
I'm choosing to let society win

Nobody wants a body
When given so easily.
Nobody trusts
In lust.
He will fail to see
What is dormant
In the soul and heart
Of the hands that touch
And the mouth that kisses.
And the advantage lies
In his taking.
While she is overlooked
Because society says something else.
And the rules were broken,
Just like her heart will be.
Because he can’t choose her.
He can only have her.

With all these voices in my head
And all the messages I've sent
All the replies I never get
They say forgive and then forget

Everything I've done has led to regret
And stood me up right on the edge
Feet halfway over the ledge
Wind in my face and what comes next?

A flashback to memories
With violent ends from violent deeds
I see them right before they bleed
And cold shivers run underneath

I've been called both crazy and insane
Like something's wrong inside my brain
To everyone else I'm not the same
I ain't normal, I ain't plain

But then again, I didn't want to be
It's not my fault I cause unease
I don't see what everyone else sees
I see dead men on their feet

Why fight on and be so strong
In a world where I don't belong?
Where everything has gone all wrong
From ongoing wars to the suicide song

I hear white noise when I walk
And whispering when I don't talk
A shadow behind that always stalks
Paranoid, eyes like a hawk

I'm sorry I'm not what you wish I was
But don't hate me just because
I don't meet your expectations
So give up on my resuscitation

*"You cannot revive the dead and ******"

How would he want you to act?
A small voice whispered in my ear.
Stop obsessing over the simple fact
Yes, you are all alone with no one to love you near
Yes, you're quite afraid
But he knows the strength within you
Apparently better than you do.
He knows your brain cuts like a razor blade
Show the world the strength he sees.
Admire the way the winter leaves freeze.
Just Breath.

Why does it matter I want to scream.
Why does his opinion matter so much?
Because maybe just maybe this one is on your team.
And he doesn't want you to use your fear as a crutch.
Because he makes you proud.
And there is now a longing to do the same.
To show him, and this bustling crowd,
your deep-seated roaring flame.

So I held my head high
and I went where I had never gone before,
With a mental battle cry.
Because I am his lioness hear me roar.