I revisit a scene once passed
A scene that went by too fast
I unconsciously reach out
And then
Fall into a ditch of murky black.

The first fall, a fall vestigial
The second fall, a fall wistful
Wistful, for I understand
That fall was untasteful
A fall that was not down
But sidewards
Not into a shadow but
A curtain painted black
A curtain that could always
Be drawn back
That is
If you wanted to push past
The strength that you lack.

A fall is a fall
But not always a fall;
In this universe
Direction is relative,
Symptoms and disease
Are not equivalent,
However
It is up to you
To draw back the curtain.

Sebastian quivered as he made his report.
Science - We did quiz. I 102 percent
History - We did read chapter. I finish first and wrote answers to questions. All correct.
English - We did grammar lesson. Adjectives. Describe words. No grading.
Sebastian hesitated, just slightly, and his father exploded.
Mathematics! Report Mathematics! Show Me!
Tears streaming. Hands trembling.
Sebastian removed the math papers from his tiny Hello Kitty backpack.
97 percent. Not perfect. Not the best in class.
The rest is unrepeatable.
Humiliation is much worse in Mandarin.

I wanted to make her feel lively,
I though of presenting her something
But, I didn't know what to present
And I wasn't going ask her too
As I knew her reply,
What then?
Then I kept trying to present her something
Until she would find the perfect something.

Once, she may also feel to present something,
And will ask me,
I will say that I want nothing,
And throughout the life I will get hearty nothings,
While for trying to present her something
Perfect, I have given everything.

Why be alone
When you can pine after apparitions
Of something better.
The good and the
Bad of it is
We don't always get what we deserve.
Why be bad
When you can fail at self improvement.
You're just a lil baby
Stumbling
Lil brat of some selfish lil ****
And that's why boys don't like to love you
But they love to use you.
Why feel sad when
You can choose to be happy you idiot.
Be mindful.
Be quiet.
Don't argue.
Don't prove yourself.
Don't care.
Pay your rent on time.
Be ****.
Be brave.
Be confident.
Submit.
Why be anything at all
When there's a great big ocean
For you to walk into.

Sometimes I just need a break
A break from this crazy life
Wanting to go to somewhere peaceful
With nature all around
Instead of flashy city lights.
Is that too much to ask for?
With all that’s going on,
Each day gets overwhelming and frustrating.
Told to do things I'm not interested in
Yet I still do it for them.
Wherever I go,
All eyes are on me.
Always expected to do my best
Even when sometimes I can’t.
I always ask for forgiveness
And think I’m never good enough.
With all that’s going on,
All I need is just a break.
A break from this crazy life

Am I adorable?
Am I beautiful?
Am I pretty?
Am I lovable?
Am I kissable?
Am I doable?

Aw shucks,
thanks for saying so.

I would paint a picture,
But it will be words coming out.

I would love and come to talk
But my mouth will zip,
by the time I even open the door.

I would be willing to express an emotion
But bring you a hanger,
so you can pull it out from my throat.

I would say I'd love to prove a point
But then forget what it was even for.

I would think there are many ways to go
But then walk on the same road.

I think I know what I would like to do next
But my brain has gone for a stroll.

Have none, not any.
Free's your life, your mind.
Sooths your soul, your whole being.