Maniacal laughter deployed to be louder than the roar of any monster
Most notably the inner
It gets harder and harder to adjust from loser to winner when just a beginner
Sold a bad bill of goods, nothing gets easier when older
I reside in my own temple but can't shake this feeling of being a squatter
Labeled by life as nothing more than NPC fodder
Never been...never seen a main character
In essence, I'm just practice for a dark passenger that always comes out of nowhere
Far scarier than the for mentioned inner monster but they conspire together
I am not now nor have I ever been a shot caller, never given a reason for no offer
Rather, I've been assigned a standard issue shock collar
Always trying to silence the hollar
Why bother?
Stay inline or find the hypocrisy of anarchy and counterculture
Tried bein' louder than ever before, pullin' from somewhere deep in my core
There's no one with a willing ear prepared to listen so no answer
Preforming to an empty chair reserved for anyone who might actually care
It's been empty for as far back as I've been allowed to remember
So I just stand there, wondering what's the matter, what is matter, do I matter?
A pitiful stature of a habitual quitter being quit on over and over
Want to know where I learned it? Just look over my shoulder in a family picture
This is a learned behavior taught by an unqualified teacher, both mother and father
Scream into the ether, I'm a dreamer but this nightmare ain't from a fever
There's no relief either
Not even first chair in the orchestra playing behind the dumpster fire of my own one man disaster picture
A head scratcher to any outsider, just another blunder to anyone who's ever been there
Next time'll turn out to be better
I swear
I'm a lier
We prefer the lie, at first it's far easier
A few too many attempts to hide the pressure, broke the regulator and boiled over
My present back lit by that there **** dumpster fire I explained earlier
My past rages unchecked through my future
A failure by every measure
No answer to why bother
...real quick...
This is off topic
But please don't let me become my father
...anyway...
Cover mistakes faster with lead paint over plaster
Pay no mind to the cancer that comes after
Dangle from a rafter like a fleshy chandelier
You don't have to guess what happened here
The dossier of the crime scene is crystal clear
You couldn't not get the picture
Even if the veil is never lifted, ignorance a problematic but gifted blinder
Gotta know I would never go and drag myself across the floor before arising once more just to lay on an altar
This has been nothing more than my dark passenger being front and center
How could I know letting it steer would lead to a full takeover of more than the arm and shoulder?
Will this ever be over?
Excuse me, is there someone there?
Has there ever been anyone other than me here for that matter?
Hello??
©2023
