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Erin May 2020
The tide rushes over her body,
and I feel it.
She starts to sink and suction
into wet sand, and
I feel it.
Anchored in,
barely breathing, but
I feel it
all.

Finally.
Bard May 2020
More than a bargain, it cost me more
But now my brains scattered on tour
Of every moment and place I hit the floor
No catharsis every stops been a chore

But I'm still looking to travel some more
Tonight my face hits the floor once again
I'm traveling through life on a tour
Feels like my body is the bus for my brain

I'm looking out the window as life happens to me
Sight-see mountains high and valleys low
Where the crows fly is where I'll be
The journey is slow and even though its all I know

A empty spot resides of another way to go
So another way is where I'll go
Till I crash and my body's all over the floor
And I 'll get up and look for more
Quill Apr 2020
There are moments where I am painfully aware of my existence.

Of the things around me.

I start to feel like I'm floating.

I'm suddenly very aware of the tiny screen I'm holding, how my fingers move across the keys, how small it is and how tiny I am.

It's dizzying.
sometimes i feel as though im floating in my own body, everything drowns out and I'm stuck in the limbo of unreality
its a nice place, for a while
me Mar 2020
today is a Gone day
the kind of day where i can't
see past the blood on my fingertips
the kind of day where standing up
or thinking too long
makes my chest ache

today the world outside my thoughts
is cloudy and irrelevant
i want to sleep but my head is too loud
i can't even speak over the deafening sounds
those wretched voices reminding me
that i'll never be enough

today I can't leave my room
reality slips under me and i'm in a Gone world
my senses evaporate and i'm left in my head,
alone, again

today will disappear from my memory
in the stream of coming days
it's already starting to slip away
one moment, and it's Gone.
quarantine is perfect for dissociative episodes :) hope y'all are coping okay and staying safe and healthy.
pearl Mar 2020
oh dear
    it seems that i've
lost track of time again
              the days are far and few between
    oh dear, oh dear
                       the minutes have melted together
          so have the hours
                                 i see no difference between
                    a week
                                     a month
                                                          or a year
it is all slow
                       i'm aging yet i feel
                                                       just like i did yesterday
           my watch must be broken
what is time? why are we stuck here? who are you? how did you get here? how did i get here?
Marco Feb 2020
I don't know myself anymore
I am so sleep-deprived
I don't remember what a dream is
I think I live in one

I am so alone
yet you keep me company
I am so sleep-deprived
you think and decide for me

I am not in control
we have ten fights a night
I went straight for your ear
there is no light, no light anymore

I am so sleep-deprived
everything's a copy of a copy of a copy
this is my life - your life?
I am so alone
yet you keep me company

I hit you as hard as I could.
This is about "Fight Club", both the novel as well as its movie adaptation.
Fiona Jan 2020
the
scariest part
is the thought:
am i really here?
please touch me,
let me know i’m here.
purges Jan 2020
my inability to feel
plagues me
defective

the endless lies i live
the conversations in my head
they encircle me

please don't take it personally
i grow colder with each passing day

as quickly as love turns to hate
as quickly as hunter turns to prey

meaningless, empty words
meaningless, empty eyes
crying void
trying to expel

someone else to give me meaning?
no, i'd rather not
i'd rather die inside a hollow life
Orchid T Aspen Dec 2019
He ran from my demons
so I wouldn't have to.

                                      He yearned for more time
                                                     like I should have.
He lived as me.

He broke as me.
                                                          He spoke in me
                                     so I wouldn't have to.

           I didn't tell him he was human.
Orchid T Aspen Dec 2019
Eventually my memory
will lament
in daydreams
//:.
that my pride
was dissolving in my bed,
//:.
that my solace
was pacing vehemently in my head,
//:.
that my martyrdom
was telling me I may recover,
//:.
that my return
was murmuring softly,
//:.
that my fury
was invading my hiding door,
//:.
that my frenzy
was stabbing at my scalp,
//:.

and perhaps my memory
will stutter
as always,
//:.


and I can stack my scabs again.
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