Can he cry
Knowing the winds won’t stop
Feeling his heart pulse achingly
Listening to the sounds in the other stalls
There are others crying with him
He still can’t cry

Can he cry
Knowing the failures will stick like duck tape
Felling his snot paint his sleeves white
Hugging himself in his time of fright
He still won’t cry

Can he cry
Knowing this is one out of too many
Feeling the burden settle so heavily
Breathing in timing to the tapping on his knee
The tears won’t come out

He can’t cry
Knowing it’ll always be the same
Feeling the drain on his psyche
Listening to the silence in the other stalls
He’s still the only one

And the winds still won’t stop
And the clouds will pass by

a ghost on the water
can you see her?
the pasts of people thrown overboard
cast aside
she is waste
second place
proxy for someone better
and she knows
there’s always someone other
than her

What if *** is there just to give us a release,
to let out all the anger and disappointment
we otherwise just stash up behind a smile

Maybe it's a way to let that long finger out
from our pocketless pants
and throw it in their ignorant faces

I'm done living like this,
Depending on substances,
My last sweet bottle kiss,
Not everyone gets second chances.

Tired of disappointing my dad,
Wasting paycheck after paycheck,
Just to feeling anything but bad,
Finally turning around this shipwreck.

Only 8 days sober from alcohol,
74 days clean from harder drugs,
Sometimes it feels like i hit a wall,
But i'm reminded by those hugs.

Reminded why i stopped,
Why i don't need these anymore,
Life's like cherries topped,
I'm not your little *****.

The air smells cleaner,
The clouds aren’t as grey,
I used to be so much meaner,
Glad to be here another day.

I'm sorry that I disappoint you, I really don't mean to
I only want to be here for you, and help you
but I guess you don't need me

I never meant to be the one who fails
the bitter pill you swallow day to day
because you have no other choice

I see the look of unsurprised disappointment in your eyes
The pain seeps into my marrow, I break apart once more
Iv'e done it again, I proved my disgraceful composition

I stand there time after time without a sound
letting your every word chip away at my heart until
it is nothing more than dust piled on the floor

I make my eyes act as barriers for the tears I dare not shed
for only behind closed doors will I take off my smile
and let my self drown in the hole where
my heart used to be

I guess it's just in my DNA to be a disappointment,
when I try to make you proud, I only make it worse
If I don't try at all, it will only confirm what you already knew

Is there no way out? Is this my unavoidable fate?

I’ve no one to share
the joy that is in my heart
no one will listen

you said that if i want him,
i should go get him...
would you say that,
still,
if you knew
that the “him” i want
isn’t a him,
but a her?