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scarlet-and-gold Aug 2018
I know you don't know me
But I've known you since 14
Like a long time friend
But I just look at a screen
Before I could drive
I watched your rise to fame
Back in 2013

As I wandered the halls
Face heavy as lead
I smeared on black eyeliner
Just as you said
You did at the same age
And I listened to Muse
Alongside the whole phandom
Just cause you liked the band

I'd come home after school
Throw my body on the bed
As the woes of adolescence
Rang over my head
A quiet, depressed girl
Shoving cinnamon bread
Down her throat

I opened my computer
And watched you and Phil
For hours and hours
And hours on end
As many teens still do to this day
You brightened my smile in a way
That very few could do
Especially back in those
Dark days at school

I'd sketch your old username
Into my desk
Hoping that the person
Who sat there next
Might possibly know
Who danisnotonfire is
The chance was small
With only one million subs
You were all ours

Time has passed
I was doing algebra
While you were becoming world famous
I was about to graduate
While you were on tour
I was overcoming my depression
As where you

As fate has it
I reached another all time low
The waves caved in on me
I had no where to turn to
So I retreated back to that place
I went many years ago
And watched your videos
The familiar rhythm of your voice
Your now curly hair
It was like a distant memory
Coming to life again

You and Phil deserve the world, Daniel James Howell
Your smiles and laughter are contagious
In this world of mistrust and confusion
You are there for anyone who needs it
And your fame hasn't changed you one bit
You are who I'm going to show my kids to when I'm 30
My grandkids when I'm 60
And tell them you meant the world to so many
Thank you, Daniel Howell
I love you
There's a tale that is told
In the night Yukon cold
Of the shooting of Dan Mc Grew

The truth as it's known
Is a legend that's grown
And the truth is known by very few

It's twenty years on
The Malamutes gone
There's nobody left from that night

But there's talk of some gold
That sometimes is told
Of what happened just after the fight

There is word of a bar
"The New Yukon Star"
And a fellow down there who can play

The place it is grand
The best in the land
And it's found down by Old Frisco Bay

Now, remember the poke
Of McGrew's the tale spoke
And what happened when Dan was now dead

From his neck it was freed
And the poke held the deed
To Dangerous Dan's claim it was said

When the Northern lights glow
Bringing life to the snow
They say that old Dan walks again

But twenty years past
Dan took that breath, yes, his last
And left the world of mortal men

Now, the saloon down in Frisco
With a barkeep named Cisco
Had a picture of Dan on the wall

They say that his ghost
Makes it smile when you toast
Dan McGrew when it is last call

A traveller came
And remembered Dan's name
One night as he sat with his drink

The piano was loud
And he saw through the crowd
A face, which made the man think

He once was a cop
And on occasion did stop
At the bar when Dan McGrew died

He looked at the face
But wasn't sure of the place
That he knew it, but **** boys he tried

There's a place saved in hell
For those under the spell
Of those who cheated out old Dan McGrew

In the stories it's told
how his poke with his gold
Was stolen by someone he knew

Think of the name
Of the one living with shame
From Dan's last night beneath the north star

Just who could build
A place always filled
A hotel and a popular bar

There on the stair
With long silvery hair
Through cigar smoke that made the air blue

Was the girl who once danced
And had Dan entranced
The girl known only as Lou
JM Romig Mar 2018
If you were online, way back when
sometime around two-thousand ten
on message boards for every scene
you may recall this silly meme

I jpeg of a young white man
with spiked blond hair and a spray tan
bejeweled teeth, and a smug-*** smile
dressed like an extra cut from 8 Mile

There is disgust in the eyes
of the woman by his side
who’s shoulder
he’s got his arm draped over

“Dirtbag Dan” the internet dubbed him
with text imposed below and above him
jeers about his scummy features -
collective criticism of creepy creatures

But here’s a tale you may not believe
Dirtbag Dan’s real name was Steve
and that picture was from New Years Eve
in two thousand three

See, Steve didn’t usually dress like that
but he was trying to impress Cat -
this girl he’d crushed on since grade school
and he thought this made him look cool

Cat came with him to that party
but she left soon after,
      with this guy named Marty
and so Steve got blackout drunk, as one does
when they’ve lost the game of love

Hung over a toilet, the next day
Steve vowed to change his ways
and ten years passed in the blink of an eye
Steve was now an employed, married, stand-up guy

While killing time, at his desk at work
he stumbled on this pic of a ****
at a party, in two thousand and three
and thinks “oh ****…that’s me!”

His workmates saw the pic as well
and gave Steve a lot of hell
this snapshot he thought was in his past
had really come back to bite him

Steve tried to fight the spread
but the damage was done
       his character, shred
thus began Steve’s downward spiral
when Dirtbag Dan went viral

He won a court case for defamation
but that didn’t do much for his reputation
he started drinking, his wife left, and he lost his job
there were rumors spread about him owing
         money to the mob?

The last time Steve was spotted in the wild
was at a Con, autographing the portrait for a child
a truly cringe-worthy scene
a man whose life was ruined by a meme
part of my # series - poems about the social internet and us
They say I am,


Then they call me Dan.

Who called upon your shores and...
said 'such-a-thing' as boorish?



rear your

       * ugly head... *
'Dan,' means 'Hero' in ancient tongue.
Dan Oct 2017
Paul was very tall
and now I have his skull
that’s not what this poem is about at all

Relax it’s a replica
given to me as they were cleaning out the office of a surgeon
did it really belong to someone?
Paul is that you?
He wears my glasses as I write
at times I’ll glance at him to the left of the laptop screen
pretend he’s watching
interested in what it is I am writing “Care you hear about this line?”
I’ll ask. No reply. He keeps to himself, or is simply ignoring me.
Deep cavities stare out, jealous of the mug or can,
more often than not containing caffeine, some sort of personal buzz,
the elixir for the page,
Hemingway’s tactics aren’t for everyone,
is there anyone famous for tea yet?

Paul has perfect front teeth, on the top at least,
he’s missing a couple on the bottom
along with one of his molars. What happened Paul?
Did you not brush enough?
A sweet tooth is a hard habit to break, it needs to be quenched,
much like the helpless need to fill the page day after day.
Classical music always plays during the sessions,
Paul likes piano almost as much as alliteration.
If he still had his hands I imagine
he’d have a million views by now,
just as many likes,
but still working a job outside of his passion to pay the rent,
much like everyone else. He’d come home from work everyday,
around five or so, sit at the piano, one given to him by his grandmother,
left to him in her will,
he wouldn’t get up from the leather covered bench
for hours, to him in the moment those hours feel like seconds,
from that bench he’d create masterpieces, rhapsody in every color,
the type of music people listen to while creating other forms of art,

the background to the inside of their minds.
There’s a replica of a brain inside of Paul’s skull.
It can be removed and taken apart, you can see where Paul kept his memories,
his passions, his regrets.
Being only a replica it’s clear, made of rubber, it’s all there though,
everything that made Paul Paul.
Berderap tegap nyaring bersuara
Saat pertama ku pajang jakun menutup pundak dan dada
"Universitasku universitas Indonesia. "
"Terangkum dalam frasa 'buku pesta dan cinta'"

Sayang hanya dalam nyanyian belaka
Isi kisahku hanya buku, tanpa pesta dan cinta

Jangan kurang jangan lebih jua
Pesta dan cinta punya takar unik pas tuk dicoba
Seperti kopi kelebihan kekurangan gula
Ada takaran pas 'tuk tiap lidah yg meminta

Kisah uiku kisah pesta
Pesta merayakan kebahagiaan,  kejayaan,  atau mungkin lepasnya keperjakaan
Kisah uiku kisah cinta
Cinta teman sebaya,  cinta maba alat pelampiasan atau cinta kakak tingkat kece mempesona
Jika kisah uimu belum ada pesta dan cinta
Maka jangan paksa diri menyeret kaki lepas dari skripsi dan tugas yang ada

**Entah malang atau baik nasib akhir kisahnya
Jangan mau lulus jika belum mencoba
Dalam lagu mars universitas indonesia,  terdapat kalimat "buku,  pesta dan cinta" yang melambangkan kehidupan mahasiswa UI selama diperkuliahan.  Namun terkadang,  tidak semua bisa merasakan ketiganya.  Ada yang hanya membaca buku,  ada yang hanya berpesta, pula ada yang hanya pergi kuliah mengemis atau menebar cinta.  Adalah baiknya,  jika sebelum lulus nanti,  kita dapat merasakan ketiganya.  Entah baik atau buruk perjalanannya,  setidaknya kamu takkan penasaran karena tidak pernah mencoba.
Autumn Sep 2016
He looked like a mixture
Of my last ex-boyfriend
And the boy that
Passed my senior year of
High school.

The perfect balance of
One of my mistakes
One of God's mistakes.

But the book he was reading screamed
And I hadn't thought
About Dan since June
And I had hoped
To keep it that way.

But here I was opening the flood gates.
And I couldn't get a proper grasp on anything.
And my handwriting was so shaky it was almost illegible.
If the shackles of the bouldering social structures collapse then the stores are closed for winter.  Sandy can wear last month’s Louis.  

If the whole world allowed us in then you shouldn’t have procrastinated poisoning the fluorescence.

If you open the worn pages of time then you won’t die alone.
Not enough, huh?

Steely Dan the doctor Frankenstein.
“I cried when I wrote this song.  Sue me if I play too long,”
Compost dreams so not long-gone?

If you have to **** yourself, then Paris becomes your drug.  
Why would I intervene an ungrateful brat?

Don’t know if your veins will end up my perfect quill but if I have lose musical chairs to my father I will get you that spotlight *******.
Deadwood Haiku Mar 2015
no unauthorized
****** cinnamon, that is
all the **** we need
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