My fiery red heart is in the darkness
Its beat is suffocating, it’s almost breathless
As every second goes by, it slows easily
And with it every cell, every atom cries for help, warily.
It’s fighting so hard every day and every minute for its survival
But I can’t help but feel even demise seems like a better call;

Oh dear hands of relentless agony,
release my heart, return my sanity.
Oh great hands that own me,
return the good part of life ever so willingly.
I'll go along my way, away from you,
Away from this tension to anything and everything new,
Anything that’ll replace this suffocating pressure!
Anything that’ll release me from this trap laid for me to suffer!

Oh tight grips of confinement, please,
From this disgusting displeasure- put me at ease.
Allow me the privilege to feel anything other than this
TORTURE, SADNESS, PAIN, I beg- open your fists.

Oh Great hands that tugs my fiery red heart,
Return it to me before I lose all my colour to this dark.
I plead to you Oh Great Hands that possess me;
Open your fists, release your grip, gently put me down and gracefully leave me be...
For everything and anything outside your existence isn’t that bad.
I just want returned to me all the innocence I once had.

Oh Great Hands of unhappiness, what do you want from me?
Have I not given you enough? What more could you possibly need? Love, maybe?
But I will never love you.
I can never love you.
I refuse to ever love you.
Oh great hands of antagonizing pain,
I’ll never see the true beauty of this life if you keep me this chained.

What is that? Your words aren't very clear!
Tell me if it's right- the words that I hear;
"Oh my precious, it is you who is the beholder of this chain.
It is you who’s holding on to something without healthy gain.
These grips have long released you from this displeasure ,
Oh my darling, it is you who is refusing to be free, refusing closure!"

Oh Great Hands that had me, return and bind me into this darkness where we once played,
bind me to you so at least I have someone to blame for this weight that never seems to fade.
Oh Great Hands that opened their fists, hold on to me and take me away from this world,
it’s not as beautiful as I thought, take me away and hide me like a pearl.
I swear I’ll not complain anymore, I swear I’ll not fight you, I swear I’ll love you.
I swear I’ll love you and all the pain you come with ever so blue.

Oh Great Hands, I beg you, please save me-----

From myself...

-fir.m

I move from room to room,
A phantom in the morning sun

I move to fill the vacant,
I move to fill the stillness,
I move to mirror my interior.

Restless in the comfort of silk,
Confined to the four walls of my brain,
I move to an irregular beat,
My feet dance across the negative space,
Fingers outstretched to nothingness

Maybe if I move,
Maybe if I manifest,
I’ll find tactility,
Maybe,

Imprisoned in our drunken thoughts of escaping
Is there any single hope for changing?
If the moon is a friend for the lonesome to talk to
Then why does it say, there are no directions available to pursue?
I wanted to live a dream, he granted it for me
And yet, there is no time to spare
O you, lonely soul, are you melancholy, or are you in despair?
Words cut like a knife sometimes
But it pierces my heart instead
They say that the end is the beginning, and the beginning is the end
Will it even ever change?

The walls have managed to keep me well-aloof and apart
It was March just the other day
My prison cocoons me in the cool autumn wind
Not sure of what danger is out there
War, virus, riots and ****
It’s a crazy world, I am safe.
I question my safety now and then.
My sanity I question more often.

I twirled in front of my dresser
Posing for acquaintances
Smiling through the boredom
Of never-ending video conferences.
The strain is showing through
On threadbare patience
Straining at the slightest provocation.

The glaring screen tempts me  
Into one last indiscretion
Of unreasonable outrage.
Elections, propaganda and
Undeserved praise
Who is worthy? You say.
Valid question.

The stench of my stale room
Reeks of carbon dioxide
The air around me
Threatening death
Inside outside
Masks always existed
Now they only cover more
Not just your intentions
And it is fine; Nightmares
Are better hidden

My prison cell comforts me
And I get accustomed
To the confinement
Of my own house
Months have passed
Days are passing
Minutes seem longer now

I can feel my brain cells dying
during government-sanctioned torture.
Dizzying debt left me lying
in a heap of steaming culture.

Forbidden from my friends, instead
I bonded with the roaches.
Free will proved a failure now
as Judgement Day approaches.

I tried to read the tiles,
wandered ‘round for miles.
I’m all wrung out of smiles,
but at least I have my piles.

No use in saying
what won’t
be understood.
After all,
how many times
must the experiment
be run?
How many
times must the
confirmation of
vacancy
distrust
misunderstanding
and rejection
be faced
before the soul
learns to stop
speaking,
as a prisoner in
a foreign
land sits silently
within a cell
between walls
built of ears
and eyes
who see and
hear all
and use
all against him?
How long before
the soul is
reduced to giving
only a knowing nod
and a saddened smile?

Enchanted a vision of pure plendour, graceful grandeur.
Like that of a starry abyss
Your eyes beckoned my soul to a journey of promised heavenly delight.
Your smile whispers my name, I immediately find me gasping to breathe.
Grasping in tandem at a  heavenly love we share.
A match adoren in heaven, our souls combined hearts beating as one, it completes us.
As your silken hand rest in mine, with unspoken words dancing around our single world.
The song in our hearts the only music we love and cry to.
When we embrace, I feel you holding as if I am the only one to save your soul.
In this instant, I hold on tighter.

You are my guiding light in a darkened world.
My oxygen in world choking
You eridicated cynicality,
I now shake the hand of optimism, I once again wed hope.