My truth has stretch marks.
It expands and contracts to accommodate your fragile ego.

Expands.
Bandaging, covering the wounds you incurred, when something far more serious is needed for triage.
The words you need to hear.
"It's fine."
"I'm okay."
Am I?
I cannot be certain anymore.

Contracts.
Retreating within the depths of myself to compartmentalize and to please you.
An inner monologue of comfort.
"It's fine."
"I'm okay."
Am I?
I cannot be certain anymore.

What has become of the truth when it can be twisted and turned, expanded and contracted, stretched and warped?
Is it still viable?
Is it okay?
Is it fine?
I cannot be certain anymore.

1, 2, 4, 8...
Chromosomes and cells of mine,
They duplicate.

My personality divides
Any and every time.

Meiosis -
My rapid mutations,
I find that they
Fuel my psychosis

Unrealistically
High expectations
I let me rip me apart
I divide and split
Over and over again

This is the alien
That I've become
I'm never enough
It's never the same
Gaps of DNA through
Generations.

Meiosis -
I know this,
I know that I'm not good enough
As a single, a one,
Tear myself in half to
Give them two
When I'm done.

They say your cells are completely replaced after 7 years.
Skin cells live a few days.
Blood cells can live up to a year.
Some cells are constantly dying and being replaced.
But the cells in your mind will not die until you do.
So in 7 years,
maybe your touch has been erased from my skin,
your chemicals leached from my hair,
and your taste will have been stripped from my tongue.
But in 7 years,
the marks you left in my mind will still be ever so present.

they
make me
turn me
to We

they live
with pride
with love
they die

love.
thats We
We cares
for me

a team
We’s made
me’s not
afraid

of all
that’s here
alone?
no, dear

cuz they
is me
and me
is We.

i will lay back and look up to see rock bottom
i will pretend it doesn't hurt to stay alive
i will be on time
i will not return myself to sender no matter how many times i address the envelope
i can't
i won't
i will pretend i feel the things i should
happiness to see my favorite heart
anger at the news
joy to eat what used to taste like anything
anxiety to look him in the eyes
and imagine the future i used to think id have
disgust at my dissection specimen
i will not wish to be lying there in its place
prodded
looking up to see rock bottom

Biology:
It is in your garden, the way you fertilized your soil
through the help of those little squishy Earth worms
and other organic fertilizers
like leftover decomposing food
Either it was for planting ornamental plants
to decorate your dull backyard or
it was for planting your favorite vegetables
to make your family healthy and save money!

I want to pick your brain for lunch to discuss the ongoings in this world and your views on controversial topics. I want to talk about the various books you read, the various shows and movies that entertain you. I want to know more about your beliefs, what appeals, riles, fascinates and triggers you. I want to know what makes you glow and dim. to watch you paint with different hues, form various constellation and explore the black hole of unexplored matter. I want to converse about the uncanny topics and the stigmatized ones. To know more about the philosophy, biology and chemistry of your existence and this world. I want to know about the intricacy, profundity and complexity around rather than keep to the surface topics.

Deeper than the captivating shape it has,
Lies a greater purpose it stands for.
So vast and strong,
It rotates laterally
and extends at your will.

It stands strong, defying gravity
cushioning you for your comfort
and holding your pelvis still.

So appreciate it for more than it's curves;
stand tall and thank your behind
when you bend.

For it is greater than
it seems.