i don't even remember the last time i thought of loving you purely
i don't even remember the last time i wanted to be in a room with you but surely
its not going to be the last time where i don't want to be near you
nor is it ever the last time i wanted to peak at you at a full view
you make me sick to my stomach, my very essence and my bones
nor the last time i want to not listen to your excessive yapping, put on my headphones
you question why i don't ever want to go and be at your home
but i don't ever want to make a church filled with lies, the best of them forms a dome
but why would i go home when i don't even feel like i have one
because every time we see each other all my instincts tell me to run
because i don't feel like i can be myself when you stay around
what the point in living my life if i'l just be forced to be your clown
oh sure you think you are superior because the almighty gave you the right
but that's not the truth because victors always makes a point to out write
to exaggerate their superiority because they won one fight
society makes hierarchies so overrated, it just gets so boring
your blatant anger just makes me laugh, cause you just keep on roaring
about how i bring nothing worth of note, honestly that just has me snoring
but who between us has degraded me, beaten me and that name
spare me your philosophies, you don't the things those things you claim
you consider me a hypocrite but aren't you just the same
honestly it is just such too much, a **** honest shame
at least i admit to myself when i am wrong, accepted that i have ill fame
but i at least have the audacity to have a head full of shame
i wonder how the hell are we connected to each other in this life
did i do something so terrible back then that i have to live with this strife?
you ignore my struggles, you would tell me that your life was hard
but to compare my hardships to your, its as if you claim to disregard
that we don't live the same life, i didn't have what you had that time
you never get tired of telling me that, you just have to win arguments everytime
this is why i don't like coming home, everything feels perverse
you raise your voice at any time, each and every sound released as a curse
if it wasn't for the things we share together, there would be nothing to coerce
me to come and see you and try to avoid conflict, change every verse
of everything i say and feel when i'm around you, i rehearse
because i don't want to let me have a headache or make everything worse
i still remember the crushing pain of every touch, every word and every mark
all because i moved or acted and spoke in a way that seemed like a bark
but is it wrong for me to want to defend myself, let alone say a remark
all i ever wanted was for you to understand my side of the story
but all you see is the threats i pose for speaking out like its defamatory
but apparently you don't care because sole control to you is mandatory
i keep looking at the days when i knew i loved you beyond reason
but all you know is to put me down like some common prisoner in trial for treason
i just wanna escape your depravity, i want to change the seasons
because i already know myself that i already have too many reasons
time is always ticking in an hourglass, i have no more time for games and for silly treasons
i'm so tired of this ride we are in, we only keep spinning round and round
i just wanna leave this all behind, stop my tears from falling and my lips from making a sound
you and i both know that this is the way it ends, both of us will go down
its already on fire and we watch us burn, this silly game will become our burial mound
i'm letting go i'm going away, i don't care if you stay behind and drown
burn in the fires you have made yourself, suffer by yourself in your little playground
i don't want to keep living life as if its just spinning continously in a blur
the life i want is the life where i can live freely, where i can be what i prefer
where my choices are the ones blooming, choices that i concur
so i'll stop watching you tear yourself into pieces, i'll walk away
i'll forget all traces of you, clear the space you occupy without delay
i'll start living my life remembering this beautiful epiphany starting today
so this came to mind at one in the morning
