I'll  wonder if you miss us, that thought itself absurd

I'll  wonder if the secrets I've told you since have been left unheard

I'll wonder if there is nothing, just blissful quiet sleep

I'll wonder if all your memories are still yours to keep

I'll wonder if I'll see you in more than just my dreams, that thought alone- sometimes- makes the pain less than it seems.

I wonder can you hear me, my laughter and my cries,

I wonder what happens when somebody dies.

I was born in the 'light'.
A light produced by 5 feet tall mirrors.
 But my shadow was faster ,
and it soon taught me,
these lights shined on to me,
 are shadows with colors,
an art, a paint job of the cult.
But I preferred my shadow to disappear
 in light of the stars.
Where I found my true destiny
The rhythm of my heart,
Marching for what is right.

I pulled the flowers from their roots
letting the thorns dig into my flesh
that had grown rough
a hard shell
the thick blood was a blatant reminder of my mortality
something I could often forget these days
as I make my home in a house of shambles and rotting wood
numb and empty and forgotten
lost to those I once loved
my pleas for warmth fall on deaf ears
they couldn't carry the pain with me
they could smile in the midst of death
but I embraced the fact that this would all end
a curse for knowing the truth, I suppose
I plucked the petals of yellow roses
and mixed my blood with the soil full of decomposition
burying myself under the blanket of the earth
letting it swallow me
digest me
this blob of rock among stars will carry the pain of knowing the truth
that life does not last forever
that the heat of blackness was our home before our birth
a comfortable universe
so when we die we will return into the darkness
unaware of ourselves