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bxtch Jul 2014
maybe someday
but not tonight
you'll realize
how much
i mean to you

And when you do
it'll be too late
bxtch Jul 2014
these three words
In my head
keep screaming
I love you
But i can't
see how
you'd be
Into someone
like me
bxtch Apr 2014
Mother and father
Why always bicker
About every little thing

Not everything is about money
we can still be happy
Only if we try

I'm tired of always
Waking up to yelling
And tons of complaining

I'm saying sorry to you father
For being such a failure
At everything

You can talk to me about plumbing
Or working and building
But I'll never change

And to you dearest mother
I won't forget last summer
When you called me gay

I cried you a river
But you never bothered
To hear me out

We were in a Starbucks
And that was the moment
I died inside

You told me shut up
While you left me crying
Just so you won't
Seem like a bad parent in public

Then when you found out
I harmed myself you
Spread the word

Now my whole family
Keeps their eyes on me
Because they think I've planted
A ****** tree

Then to my sister
I still remember
All of my birthdays
When you left my crying
By always blaming
Me for all our problems

I'm sorry I'm not perfect
That I'm such a burden
But I won't cry
I'm done trying to please
Everybody I see

It's just not me
I hope the sloppiness of my poem doesn't get in the way of my emotions.
I'm sorry I'm not perfect.
bxtch Mar 2014
I'm not the poet who uses sophisticated language
I'm not the kid my parents would be proud of
I'm not the student the teacher praises
I'm not the friend who people turn to

I'm not anyone's best friend
I'm not anyone's favorite
I'm not anyone's first choice
I'm not even my own believer

I want to fix my life
Yet I want to end it
I want to be better
Yet I'm tired of trying

What is wrong with me?
I'm sorry I'm not who you want me to be.
bxtch Mar 2014
Bring me back to the days
When sharpeners were just for pencils
Bring me back to the times
When dieting was just a choice

Bring me back to the place
Where the warmth could still reach me
Bring me back to the person
Who not once had teased me

Bring me back to the age
When milk was my whiskey
Bring me back to the past
When I only pretended to smoke

I guess it's too late
To bring me back to life
I guess it's too late
To pull out the knife

All I want now
Is for you to remember
And look back a the moments
When you made me suffer
To my dear parents
bxtch Mar 2014
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall;
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Didn't want to put Humpty together again.

Humpty Dumpty why so pale?
Is it because you're such a fail?
Humpty Dumpty what is that?
Is that a **** or are you just fat?

Humpty Dumpty your lips are so red!
Is it because your baby is dead?
Oh, Humpty Dumpty you make me laugh
Because your body looks like a full grown calf.

Humpty Dumpty what is your gender?
You look like a boy and a girl mixed in a blender.
Humpty Dumpty you're such a *****!
You're not even close to being rich.

Humpty Dumpty next time you fall,
Please don't ever forget to call.
Humpty Dumpty I'll be there in behalf
of everyone to laugh!
To my dear teacher,

bxtch Feb 2014
It's 2 in the morning
And I'm *triggered already

My body is aching
While I stop myself from crying

It's 2 in the morning
And my stomach is grumbling
I want blood, guts, cookies and cakes
I'm gonna puke them anyway

It's 2 in the morning
And I lie awake alone
With no one to hug me
Or tell me I matter

It's 2 in the morning *
And I'm *starting to recall

Every single name I've been called
Just to push me off the ledge

It's 2 in the morning
And I'm painting with a twist
The twist is the fact
That my canvas is my wrist

It's 2 in the morning
And I've written my last words
I'm caught in the loop of paradise
As I tip the chair to fall off

It's 3 in the morning
And my blood is dripping
My parents are crying
While I died smiling

They open up the letter
And they wept as the read:

*Dearest cruelest world,
Look at what you've done
You've crushed my fragile heart
And please don't tell me I'm being selfish
Because everyone wanted me dead
Sure my parents are mournful
But it's because of obligation
Not love
My siblings won't mind
Since they'll just take my possessions
And I'm sure my friends won't bother
Since they've all left me
So at the end of the day
I've done this for I pitied
What could have happened
If I continue to let them hurt me
Those lonely nights when
you just don't know why
you feel so depressed and angry....
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