It wasn’t a flashback.
I sat there, staring at you
as if we were 10 years in the past
but my memories remained,
I remained.

I froze,
as if I could never move again
in a fit of panic –
Freeze Tag –
Bare and Vulnerable.
I tried not to cry
and almost failed.

It wasn’t until I got home
that I realized
you had a brother.
You had a mom and dad.
You were also a human
with hopes and dreams,
but somehow,
you just went so wrong.

I thought I ran into a ghost
and instead, I ran into reality.

You make me feel this way somehow,
as if I am so beautiful
that the earth will shatter
if I move like I know it.
And I know it now,
so let's watch me
break this world together.

What once was
  Never happened
  The way we thought that it did.
Become aware of how it has been,
And how it shall be again.

So when my mind
Concurs to you who
  Loves to lie beneath my skin.

My truth divides  
Two sides
Colliding  
  
Truth and denial
At war within.

Maybe it's the poet in me
that believes
that after all these years,
and miles,
and songs,
that you might untangle yourself from her arms,
tug on the string I tied to our fingers before you left,
and find your way back
to me.

Your heart
is pulling you across the ocean,
to ports with open arms waiting for you;
and I'm left here wondering
why it wasn't enough
that I would have tore out my rib cage
and made it into a boat
for you to sail yourself there in.

I would wait here,
at this port
that is both where you have been
and where you still are,
until I turned to stone.

It's the poet in me
that can't let you go.

My mind keeps forgetting
how to breathe right
For while others air go
In and out
out and in
In a simple function of normality
Mine falters a lot of the time

Turns my voice into wheezing gasps
The dead could speak better than I
My lungs squish into a tiny box
In the center of my chest
Causing a volcanic eruption of pain

It is a very similar feeling to my heart
Which thumps and clamors
At a speed unknown to humanity
The pace of a jackrabbit heart
whose cotton little tail's on fire
Until it simply feels like it
**pops

Stones settle on the riverbed
The water rushes on for now, but
Someday where the river is fed
Will dry, and the river will bow

To her, o' earth so dear

And the stones will still remain
Unmoved, but not quite the same
A little worn away, some but a sliver
Having lived with the mighty river