i thought you were a mirror


                                                     but you were a time machine


*(you remind me of who i used to be more than you remind me of me)

you are a planet
                              
                           ­       but i am a star


*(i am bigger than you, i will burn your eyes out, and i do not orbit around you)

0
fine by myself
(0.5
was i ever)
1
starting to talk
(1.5
not knowing how to talk)
2
common interests
(2.5
actually talking)
3
talking more first friends
(3.5
a springboard)
4
leaps and bounds - crickets chirping, fast and annoying
(4.5
finding friends in speed)
5
forgetting
(5.5
never truly forgetting)

6
meeting

7
desiring

8
friendship

9
evolving

10
­losing count

1_
not needing to count

beyond numbers
an entire world

no numbers
reunions

infinity
better with others

one door closed, another opened
but even knowing that there is no way
to twist and wring positive thoughts
from a door slammed in my face

you told me why
you preferred closed doors
but even so
that hurt me more

doubt eggshells crack and hatch
branching thoughts of what this must mean
were we not friends? i thought we were
but i kept my thoughts unseen

do i regret this?
at the time i didn't want to seem desperate
if i asked again i might've found another way
but caring so much about this was pathetic

in the end, i don't know myself
muses have died and revived from the ashes
repurposed feelings like a fire-heat phoenix
they're part of me now, we've survived all the crashes

you can have your doors, closed they may be
because exterior and interior aren't important at all
different paths but we still walk the same road
i'm over it, it was nothing personal and i'm not gonna fall

the alternate universe theory
in which everything that could be real?
is real, in at least one universe

the universe where i am included in you
the universe where i talk to you more
the universe where i fit in with you
the universe where i actually feel a connection
the universe where i am in tune with you
the universe where everything makes sense like maths equations
the universe where me and you

the universe that isn't this one

what is it that i feel?
is it jealousy? of what you are
do i miss you? and all that we were

now i have a chance to change this

but i don't think i can take it

Midnight void takes hold of all
They cannot move, they cannot fall
No time in here, no space to move
They’re drowning in nothing and there’s no-one to soothe
No stars, no colour, eyes open or closed
For them, is this the end of the road?
Static fills their mind like they can’t connect
Vegetative state like they’re just an object
Is this something? Is this nothing? Existence or lack thereof?
Somehow, somewhere, this might just be both

i disagree
when people say that this world doesn't have magic
would you say there is not something enchanted
about stars sparkling like glitter and dust in the air
moons and streetlights in likeness being beacons in the darkness

it's 1am and there are people awake, everywhere in the world

for a second,
it feels like everyone's listening to the same song
i am charged with the same energy as everyone and everything
i am connected to magical ley lines and spell undercurrents
there's nothing like this connection running deep to rune collections

it's 1am and i'm still awake, i am the world and the world is me