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Tired, stressed
And depressed
I'm a mess
Got no ******* money left
Can't go to sleep
Or get out of bed
Can't stop thinking
About next month's rent
Don't know where I'm going
And forgot where I went

Always thinking about
Time better spent
Abusing myself
Just trying to clear my head
Isolation
Is my only friend
The start has faded
There's only the end
All the King's horses
And all the King's men
Couldn't put me
Back together again
It's time for a name
Not to be just another 'name'

To anyone who lost a life
You didn't die in vain

Colour doesn't matter
Inside we're all the same

It's time to stop the suffering
It's time to stop the pain
Northern Poet Mar 18
****** Tesco
They sold out of pesto
And cheerios
So I bought a bag of Cheetos
This place is full
Of ******* weirdos

You won’t find any pasta
Down in T’Asda
There’s still tinned tomatoes, though
If that’s what you’re after

I went to Waitrose and then Saino’s
Still can’t find any ******* potatoes

Then I took a trip to Marks and Sparks
With Mark and Spencer
Got bread, milk
And a **** load of lentils
And stuck it all in a blender

I found a pound on the floor
In Poundland
Went outside and put it in a man’s hand
Went back inside
And got a pound of ham
And a bit of spam
You can’t beat
Chopped pig in a can

Then I went outside and rang me mam
Times like these you’ve gotta check in with the fam

It was a little bit busy in Lidl
Thought I saw a cat
Playing a ******* fiddle
The coffee aisle was empty
And I was stuck in the middle
The fridges and freezers were ransacked
By geezers wearing anoraks
Looking for loo roll
Was like looking for Anne Frank

Morrison’s
In the morning sun
Is not what you need
When you’re feeling glum
I’ve ran out of everything now
Nowt to clean my gums
You need bog roll
When you’ve got the runs
God, you should hear me grunt
I said oh ******, ee-ba-gum

Let’s all get down to Aldi
There’s a big one down in Armley
They’ve got fruit, meat and parsley
Shopping in there feels like
You're in the ******* army
Scrapping over household essentials
These folk are completely ******* barmy
Grabbed a case of beers
For an isolation party

They ran out of ice
In Iceland
The rice was twice as nice
In Iceland
The mice were rife with lice
In Iceland
Variety is the spice of life
In Iceland
Wanna stick my head in a vice
In Iceland
A man with a knife
Fighting over an Angel Delight
In Iceland
Everything was half the price
In Iceland
That’s all why mum’s go to Iceland

There was nothing nice in Netto
The only supermarket
That’s like walking
In a ******* ghetto
I got some strawberry gateau
And some fruit pastels
Supermarket sweep
Full of ******* rascals

A mile long queue for tobacco
Sold out of Tabasco
I got some lovely vine tomatoes
Cheese, dips and nachos
Angry women
Stomping about like ******* rhinos
This world is full of whino’s
I’m sat here thinking why though

Everyone’s panic buying products
Like it’s going out of fashion
The war is over
And now I’m living off ******* rations

So stop panic buying
You selfish *****
Northern Poet Mar 17
It's a pandemic
A global epidemic
People are dying
And they're telling us not to panic

Setting the scene
In your quarantine
Fresh air and reality
Now seem a distant dream
Everything used to be so serene
Now it's pandemonium in the shops
People fighting over toilet roll
Someone please
Call the cops

The sirens never stop
In the city that never sleeps
Deserted like an island
Where the lonely hearts still beat

Our faith will never die
While the government keep telling lies
All we can do is try and survive
And think of our loved ones
Who lost their lives
Northern Poet Sep 2019
When I looked
Into your eyes
I saw the truth
Behind your lies
And I won't play
All your games
'Cause you think
We're all the same

How could you be this heartless?
How could you be
This heartless?

Memories
Have come to pass
And this
Was never meant to last
Thrown away
Into the sea
Is this the death
Of you and me?

How could you be this heartless?
How could you be
This heartless?
Northern Poet Sep 2019
If I asked you
To take my soul
Would you take me out
Of this hole?
If I asked you
To stand and fight
Would you stay with me
For one more night?

Can't you see
We're meant to be
Just you and me
For eternity

If I asked you
To be my girl
Would you take me out
Of this world?
And when I'm down
Would you pick me up
And take me out
Of this town?

Can't you see
We're meant to be
Just you and me
For eternity
We'll live our lives
By the sea
I'll show you what
You mean to me

If I asked you
To take my heart
And take me back
To the start
And when the sun
Is shining through
The light shines
On me and you

Can't you see
We're meant to be
Just you and me
For eternity
We'll live our lives
By the sea
You're sipping wine
I'm drinking tea
Originally written as an acoustic number back in 2012
Northern Poet Sep 2019
My timeline is filled
With self indulgent selfies
Searching for gratification
And self satisfaction
Need to get an instant reaction
Some social media traction
There's no time for distraction
From this digital attraction
You can't get enough
Of the interaction
1,000 poses in your camera roll
Narcissists are taking control

It doesn't matter
What the time
Come wind, rain
Snow or shine
Just make sure
You look devine
Lick your lips
You're looking fine
Flip the camera
And strike a pose
Making sure
Everybody knows
Here's your next
Digital daily dose
Does it really matter
Which ******* filter you chose?
I feel like I've lost my soul
Narcissists are taking control

The bathroom
Is the perfect spot
Take your picture
Before you Photoshop
Bunny ears
And a rainbow smile
Frogs legs
And a crocodile
Snapping away
Well all the while
You could have been
Down the Curry Mile
Instead you're out there
On your own
Sat at home
On your ******* phone
Sharing pictures
With people you don't know
You'll end up on the ******* dole
Narcissists are taking control

1,000 poses in your camera roll
Mirror selfies
And online trolls
Constantly searching
To find your soul
There's no way out
Of this black hole
Just one more post
On your way home
Narcissists are taking control
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