I thought you were perfect
and so I loved you.

The dots on your face
make a brand new
celestial universe

You were an enigmatic
planet- and I’m still not through
in exploring your
inimitable realm

But then I saw the
perilous black holes
in your solar system
and I was inevitably
****** into its vortex

when i gradually deciphered
your mysteries-
I saw cracks in your world
I’ve never seen before

but I would gladly be
the cosmic energy
to lessen the night
inside your abysmal soul
and I would help fix
the cracks in your
catastrophic world

And even if I’d never
mend your brokenness
or solve your clandestine codes,

I’d know that you’re imperfect,
and I’ll love you even more.



-m.j.a

I don't understand
how hearts work
after they've been scathed
and shattered
over and over again

or how someone
who gives you strength
makes you weak in the knees.

I have often wondered
why people never get tired
of waiting for nothing

or how they pour
everything to someone
and leave none
for themselves

I don't think I could ever
understand the things
people do for love

or the things I do
for you.



-m.j.a

i read an excerpt once
that if you read something
over and over
it loses its essence

pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty
pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty
pretty pretty pretty
pretty pretty
pretty
it becomes meaningless.

you do the same things
again and again and again and again
and again and again and again and
again and again and
again
one day you'll forget why.

loving you
is the only thing i do
every minute,
every second,
over and over again

i'm sorry
if the day would come
that I'd forget the reason why.

but then i realized
there was no why to forget
for there was never even
a why
in the first place.


I take back my apology.



-m.j.a

my mother told me
that I should take
great precaution
because some people die
of a broken heart

what she doesn't know
is I would choose
to die
in the most brutal
and grotesque ways possible
over and over again
just to have my heart
broken by
you.

Don't tell her I said that.


-m.j.a

i fell in love with you
like fire

it was a flame at first
small and barely visible
but the warmth of its glow
replaced the crevices
where the darkness in my heart
resides

then suddenly-
it was wildfire.
it was passionate
and obsessive
the flames were getting out of control
not only the crevices burned
but my heart in its entirety.

i was blinded
by the blaze of the inferno
and the pungent smell of smoke
and when my vision cleared
i was nothing more
than futile ashes
scattering in the grim wind


-m.j.a

it's not my fault
if i don't hear you
whenever you talk to me

why the pounding in my chest
is the only thing i hear

or why the butterflies
are nothing
compared to the entire animal kingdom
i feel inside me

but i'm sorry,
nonetheless.

what were you saying?


-m.j.a