I want someone who
knows the silence of my soul.
Yes, we will build our lives
from a sweet silence that
only we can understand.

Dear diary;
I do not feel-
no, I do not feel anymore.
Sometimes I can feel my heartbeat,
or a lonely butterfly in this stomach
but that pales in comparison to
when I used to feel alive,
to feel any hope at all.

I want to
drink from your
lips as if you were
an oasis in
the desert.

To dig up the past,
is to raise the dead.
Let it rest,
for you will find
nothing but rot and death.
Do not relive the horrors
of a life now deceased.

Distance is the bridge
that separates our two worlds-
A bridge I must cross.

8:51 PM
26/9/24

Even while you're gone,
You will remain in this heart
for you are the rhythm of its beat,
the source of its love and joy.
You are inseparable to this heart
as I am to yours
for we share the same
rhythm and blood.

Your laugh
still echoes in
my mind,
my dreams,
and that's the
saddest part of all.

What is sadder than
to end something that could have
given us much more?

11:31 PM
26/4/23

I seem to know how
to chase the stars-
but never how to
catch them.

Even if my lips grow parched
I will still refuse to yield
to your rose red lips.
I will refuse their nectar,
your petals and your
siren scent.

This world
is under no obligation
to be less weird
than fiction.

Letting go of you
was the best thing I have done.
Yes, I found you out.

10:21 PM
20/8/20

I have lost so much
and one more thing won't make a
difference - I'm at peace

4:12 PM
29/6/23

There are still stars
in the sky where you sed to twinkle.
Sometimes I am lucky to witness
a shooting star when we talk
but that is fleeting in an
otherwise dead sky.

Your love
makes me feel like I'm
falling like a petal in
your presence.
Carried by your breath,
I drift into your heart
and make my home.

You closed the door on
me and I closed the door on
everybody else

10:04 PM
6/4/22

I do not wait for you,
but I am all you have and
all you will ever know.
I can distance you from people,
but I can also bring you together.
I can heal wounds and I
can open up old scars.
I am time.

We were
not made for this world.
We were made for
each other.

I see your smile
and I wonder if heaven
has opened for me

10:12 AM
18/3/23

We have nobody to blame
for these feelings but ourselves.
How we react depends on how
we interpret the situation.
Just remember that you are
your own source of emotion-
the keys to this ride
we call life
is yours.

People can get quite
defensive when they don't know
what they claim to know

4:01 PM
31/10/22

Somehow, I always
seem to leave with a bit less
than I had before

12:13 AM
9/8/21

It came like a cloud
that appeared out of nowhere,
like an unexpected storm
upon my shores without warning.
One moment there was sun,
and the next,
darkness.

Dear Diary;
I have concluded that
there is no soul left in me-
maybe I never had one.
All I know is that there are
no dreams and no love
to be desired.

I miss you
like a dolphin
misses that breath
of fresh air to sustain itself
in the unforgiving depths
of the ocean,
and tonight,
my bed lies at the
bottom of the ocean.

Sometimes the
need to want hits me
like meteor and I
am knocked off course
into the void of
cold memories and
the emptiness of loss.
Once again,
I am left to find
my way back to
my sun.

When the time is right,
we will meet again, that is
my promise to you

4:12 PM
4/1/21

Were we tearing each
other apart for a love
not worth falling for?

3:43 PM
25/2/21

Dear diary;
I think I am starting
to believe in love again.
Each crush feels like the first time
and each kiss melts this heart-
the same stone heart I thought
would never crack again.
Indeed, I think I am ready
for love to destroy me
again.

I don't want to
be your next station,
I want to be your
destination.

She swallowed my
heart and my soul
like a tornado
swallows all the
life it touches.

Tell me
the reasons why
I should stop loving you
just because you stopped
loving me.

There are a lot of
ways to stop the pain but the
scars always remain

1:47 PM
3/8/21

"We are here for you, always."
"You can tell us anything, always."
"We are so glad you are in our lives."
"We love you, we care for you."
"We will never leave you."
"We are your friends, always."
Liars.

Some people
plant seeds in your heart
and grow only the purest of things
while others
seek to cut them down
and salt the earth of your soul.

We know nothing.
The only difference is that
some of us know we
know nothing.

I miss you like
a seed in winter
craving the warm sunlight
of your touch and the
rejuvenation of your rains
to keep me blooming
throughout  
the year.

You are a miracle!
Do you know how wonderful you are?
I celebrate it every day.
So always be yourself-
the miracle that you are.
Bless every second,
every heart, every day
with the miracle
that is you!

Why do I still
feel you in my bones?
Memories still fill my chest,
leaving butterflies in their wake
just as you once did.

Sometimes the only
logical thing to do is
forget and move on

4:06 PM
4/12/23

Time has an ugly
way of bringing out the truth
in all of our hearts

6:31 PM
12/7/21

I wish people were
more like shooting stars
that would disappear in
a flash of an eye,
leaving no trace but
the memories of something
that was once beautiful
rather than the sun-
an unforgiving and inescapable
giant that leave us burnt
and burdened.

Our worlds
have split in two
and you’ve gone too far
to come back.
We both can’t go back
to that world
We can’t ever call it
home again.

The sun goes down
and I take comfort in the night.
I wait for the moon to return,
and with him, the shadows,
silence and solitude.
It is at night where
I can forget about reality and
the bustle of everyday life.
It is at night where I can breathe,
to take inspiration from the darkness
and let the mind run free.

My dreams were clearer
without the taint of your name,
your face, memories...

4:54 PM
12/6/22

i never meant
for you to hate me,
I wanted the opposite,
in fact.
I suppose it is better this way,
for me,
at least.

What is so sad
about nostalgia is
how it leaves one frozen
in time.

You planted your seeds
in my heart,
long ago.
What do I have to show for it?
A heart full of sunflowers.
Darling,
you are my spring.

Your birth is a
love letter to my soul.
Whether you are near or far,
your existence will forever
adorn this heart.

I do not need death
to enter heaven,
to be by your side is
enough to make me feel
like I'm with an angel.