your absence has been revealing
the reach of your arms; exposed
my thoughts,
feelings and actions
forever altered from our encounter

I have learned from our departure
you were not the flaw
I was flawed before we met
and now understand that you were my voice
but I haven't spoken since

its been two years
without you in my life
since I abruptly left
years full of pain and confusion
of being lost
the pain you brought me
was nothing compared to the pain without you
the soundtrack of my life
missing

it's one of those days
where nothing seems to be going right
and everything is out to get you,
woken up on the wrong side of the bed
and your whole day is off
you feel uncomfortable
but for no particular reason,
you're trapped inside with nothing to do
desperate to socialize
but your mood is contradicting your thoughts
and you get annoyed at the littlest things
but you don't know why
and no matter what you do to fix it
nothing will change
because it's one of those days
and those days never end
while we're stuck inside,
doomed to repeat them again.

You're like the villain in my own story
as soon as it seems good you reappear,
what was once so close is no longer near.

When I take one step forward, you take two steps back
two steps forward, four steps back
no matter where I go, I'm always trapped.

I stand on these crutches but others stand higher,
while they're looking ahead, I'm looking tired
I guess it's just how we're wired.

We've convinced ourself this is normal
"I'm just stuck in a rut!" but in actuality,
maybe I'm just a nut?

When you're flushed with sadness and have no other,
blue is your only color
With a blue heart and a blue soul, a new person begins to unfold

Drowning in a sea of sadness,
Burning in the fires of hate,
Blinded by the deceit of lies,
Only one color awaits

Inside of you, there is nothing new,
meat, bones, a whole skeleton too,

Aside from that only you can see,
That inside of you is the blue I see.

I’ve finally opened my eyes and seen,
That encased by the blanket of this cave, I am free,
Still, I look around and see the world laid out in front of me.

To have woken from the long drawn out dream,
I’ve yet to recognize those surrounding me,
For they’re blinded by its light, my eyes have been opened and seen.

Cushioned by the falsehoods of its warmth,
Deceived by the lies in its message,
Whenever I look out, I don’t recognize this world in front of me.

submerged by the intensity from above, the curtain has fallen over,
Omnipresent, its beady eyes wait to deliver with intensity,
For the facade of the forever omnipresent has opened its eyes and seen,

The cataract of its illusion has lost its control of me.
Comfort in the cave has provided its solace, now
As I peer through the cracks to this wonderful world laid out in front of me,

I see the canvas of an artist, eager to begin,
Waiting for the soon-to-be sprouting daffodils,
Beneath the blanket of the sky, I’ve finally opened my eyes to now see
The beauty and innocence of the world laid out in front of me.