one more time, she whispers,
she whispers violently, tremulously, like an addict whispers
to the fingernail marks in her skin, like persephone whispers to pomegranate seeds, like sin, and her whispers collect on dollar bills in the wind, and the money flies home but she's still sitting in that bin,

wondering if Hades ever regretted his win

your skyscrapers are just overgrown hairs
gaea has neglected to shave.

is this rage my sword?
are those eyes her arrows?

                                                  is humanity an armory or an army?

when blood rains from the heavens
is it our reward
or our reckoning?

above all,

                                               is this sword for me? should i fall on it?

the government shoots half of us with poison darts
and the other half with vaccines
and as the venom slides through our veins
the vaccinated half screams
why are you crying? we felt the same pain! .

looking at the ocean,
                the stars,
     feeling the vastness and
futility
         of all the universe--
         do you feel the
         rumbling of the sea
         like a heartbeat?
         can you taste the
         stars?

i look at all of these perilously perfect poems and i want to SCREAM
life, your life, mine is not a dream this is not a picturesque reality
please---can we try for a bit of authenticity? c'mon i mean
we all love roses and the sunset gleam but your life isn't
an oil painting (or a tv screen) so can somebody sit down
and write a few lines about the dull gray sky or how her eyes
looked less like a forest and more like a swamp (with flies)?

this ,,hurricane in my chest cavity, it is TOO LARGE for me, i cannot cry this one away, i cannot choke down this cataclysm i was not built for devastation
     i only bruise my knuckles 'cause i cant contuse my mind,

                                                  lover mine.

how strange, how unfathomably empty and grand
is life. death.

people are not small, they are terrifically gigantic, brilliant---
and when they die
they create black holes,
                                               like stars

WOOP it is all the same with u isn't it, my aquatic lover? would you please! take a moment to keep the drain in place. what EXACTLY did you think would happen when you told all the fish they were insignificant
now the waterlilies spit bile and the dolphins scream

baby, you wanted FREEDOM

                                                     these tsunamis didnt need your pity

rarely am i so torn as when i think of all the ways i have failed to love those dear to me

an iron bar in my chest, pinching my lungs,
my stomach. tears and taunts erupt--recoiling from your
touch, pleading
    crush me
                         set me free .

carve yourself a niche, a vegetable garden of new
beginnings and secret
spearmints. celebrate your choices, your regrets. your
teary-eyed nostalgias


                                              lost pets

if your thoughts, like flies, do not flit across your mind
before bouncing from your
salivating tongue

(with rage)
                     please mix bug spray with your mouth wash.

drink up, kid--you've got a while to run,
there's pervert politics and the summer sun
and take the *****, kid--you'll need it for sure
don't follow roads, don't tell them where you were
got any news, kid? we've been hiding out
stayin' outta this town, away from the crowd
buy me new shoes, kid, i know you got cash
you been talkin' to the papers, gettin' kinda rash
what'd they promise you, kid? safety? fame?
lies. you know they're just saving face
and i hope you got a plan B or C, kid
reporters are trash but they messin' with big ****
change your name, kid. (fly to Spain--quick!)
you messin' with snakes, and you're about to get bit, kid!
here's your lesson now, listen real good
gonna tell you once, then i'm gone for good:
better keep your tongue in your head next time
or your body gone be ****** and the fault not mine.

i churn my stomach to bile again and watch *****-up teens choke on each other's leftovers. why do flare up tragedies taste like strawberries?

why do we still go berry-picking?

as i drive away from the cigarette town where my tattoo and blue mascara relatives stay i take off my yellow shades and sputter, blowing away the curry-clumpy feeling in my lungs that whispers you are all the same .

yeah man, anxiety's not real i mean,
it's O.K. to be shy and all, but let's not be DRAMATIC,
your lungs look perfectly fine from here, why r u gasping? lol
for god's sake, get out of bed and take an aspirin
what's that? your hands shake? you must be cold (on a summer day?)
hey, why's your sleep schedule so ******?
if you ask me, that's why you have anxiety
if bad thoughts keep you up at night, just don't think!
problem solved. ;)
i think i have a career as a SHRINK

i am so sorry for the next time i lose myself

let blessings stain the skin beneath your scars

do not romanticize the weapons with which
this world has mauled you.

love,
except what i see
in you.

i am the aftermath of war,
the tidings that you dread.
the heart when very sore
in a lonely unmade bed.

i find you in the darkness,
alone at 4am,
when guilt is but a wilderness
and night is at an end.

you see me in the shadows
of a long-forgotten grave;
in alleys that are narrow
and seldom ever paved.

you hear me in the sobbing
of a child lost from home;
in the cries of a wolf howling
at the pale and distant moon.

you call me something different
in each corner of your earth,
but recognize me even in
foreign looks and words.

sorrow is a pretty way
to give despair a name,
but sometimes you cannot say
so much in words so tame.

the sky flings rain on grass and window screens
flowers grow
but glass just blurs like tears