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 May 2017 juno
You see, i can tell you about:
the far away stars that wander through the space,
their speed, and movements and axes,
without seeing their true beauty and grace.

I came to study in great big city,
because they told me  i was smart,
playing games with big numbers,
only dividing myself apart.

I run and hide from people,
a few thousand light years away,
i'm only good with measuring the distance,
with things that wander and stray.
 May 2017 juno
I think
I've lost the desire
To create art.
It's no longer pleasing-
Nor is it peaceful.
It's become more
Of a hassle
Than a way of life.

And I don't completely
Understand why.

"You're a really good artist.."
"Are you planning to pursue it as a career?"
"But.. Why not?"

I think
The American way of life
Has crushed my dreams
Of living the way I wanted to
And made me believe
I have no other choice
but to live
as the puzzle piece
they want me to be.
why must you take part of us away
 May 2017 juno
m j g
 May 2017 juno
m j g
we woke up together, enveloped in each other and your bedsheets, to the sound of soft wind chimes in your bedroom window and cars driving past your home. your room smells like your cologne and the laundry detergent my mother used when i was young. you lazily half moaned, half murmured, "good morning, love," and you, with your dazed condition and morning breath, found my lips and met them with yours. you pulled me in closer and ran your fingers gently through my messy, tangled hair, and i inhaled your scent so deeply i could feel it softly settle in the bottoms of my lungs. the morning sun shined through your bedroom window and the shadows of the trees outside danced in the wind along your baby blue bedroom walls. you ran the tips of your fingers gently in sporadic loops along my shoulder blade and spine. we lay there and took it all in, took each other in, our legs intertwined and my head against your chest. for these few minutes i found myself wishing we could live infinitely in these small, precious moments, the ones we take for granted, the ones we only remember when the big picture is gone. i snuggled closer into your arms and we drifted back to sleep, heartbeats synced and bedsheets entangled in our legs.
 May 2017 juno
Decorating my bedroom floor.
Lit candles
Flickering upon nightstands.
Our favorite gentle music
Dancing into my ears.
And you're there, too
Waiting upon bed sheets
Bidding me come.
And as passion befalls me
Cold, frigid water
Rushes down my naked skin.
The warm water exhausted
Brings me back
To sitting in the shower
I miss you, baby
 May 2017 juno
 May 2017 juno
The stars are out tonight
I gaze at them from my yard
My hair spread out on the grass
My mind races
Focused on how far away these glittering lights are
An entire universe is out there
But it was not made for me
I am small
But can a light still burn inside me?
Especially if I feel so dark?
I like to think we are all stars
And astronomers at the same time
Searching for our place in the galaxy
Will you be a star with me?
With you I no longer feel dimmed
Can you let me illuminate your world?
I’ve been pulled in by your gravity
There’s no way to leave your orbit now
Even if I wanted to
 May 2017 juno
who am i?
 May 2017 juno
she cries herself to sleep
she hurt herself to bleed
she pleaded herself to keep
she loved him just to be tricked—

and starved herself to live.
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