The constellation of the night sky
Dotted with Asterism
Calling our attention to the mystical lights
Plotting an image on our minds
The celestial space is where minds wander*





© Amitav (Radiance)

I long for permanence
Not a rush of euphoria that disappears in an instant

A permanent face
That beams when he meets mine
A permanent heart
That stays loyal as a soldier would for his country
A permanent body
That never allows me to feel its absence
A permanent soul
That would be ready to rescue my every fall

While the world and I longed for these worldly things
It recently struck me how very selfish I have been
To not be in gratitude of He who is the King

He's not mere permanence, he's infinite
I call him 5 times a day
And if I need him more
I just have to raise my two hands and He's there
He gives me wealth when I deserve it,
Love when I need it and least expect it
Pain when I deserve it

How could I complain?
How could I ask for more?
He has all that I need.

But women are women
We crave to feel loved
Some grow impatient
Some succumb to temptations
Deluded, they thought that this worldly love, that is hurting them, is true

I believe that whoever He sends is written for me
And so I shall wait
Daintily patient on calm days
Deliriously in frustration on rough days
But this wait is still a wait

To the lads who are all smitten
Break those walls if you dare
Actions, not words will allow you to overcome these walls
Even if you do, I can't guarantee that you've sealed the deal

Until the right one comes,
I will stand happy and tall
Though I am very well aware
That I am quite small

April 24 2010 there was a Boy Scout display in the parking lot North of Mickey Ds and by the Imagination Station. Tony was fascinated by many of the displays. The Sheriff’s Office was well represented with several displays. Tony got to climb up on the rescue boat, the one we see going by our house frequently in the summer to fish someone out of the river. The two Sheriff’s Office Deputies in charge of the boat were really good with the kids. About 15 minutes later Tony bent over the bow of the boat, I was on the good ole solid ground, and said to me, “These guys are really COOL grandpa.” I said, “yup, they are.” and looked over at one of guys. I ask, “Did you hear that?” With a big grin he said, “I sure did.” He had a big grin on his face for a while. Tony debarked and headed to new territory. I have to have speedy shoes on to keep up some days. I wish I could find a pair of those.

Later we were at a different car on display. The people there were young intern or trainee types wearing the Sheriff’’s Office shirt and hardware. Tony had bailed out of the armored car where he had been playing for 20 minutes and was standing next to me watching the young group yucking it up. They were loud and horsing around some… with out the horse. All of a sudden he got a scowl on his face and said in a rather loud voice, “Grandpa, those are NOT real cops. Why are they wearing uniforms? They should not do that.” Well that was hard to explain and I was hoping “they” did not hear what he said. We left rapidly.

I guess he thought they were not acting the way officers should act. At least not like the COOL guys at the boat. I suppose that comes from trying to instill respect in the uniform of peace officers. The lesson is one each of us needs to remember. If we say we are (fill in the blank) then we had better act the part or we can lead an impressionable young mind astray. So lets be COOL.

That’s my story and I am sticking to it.

Things aren't going right again today
I wish I could close my eyes and pretend
That's everything would be fine soon

But then again, I need to tackle this mess
It threatens to over power me and gain
Do you know that creepy feeling, like all is lost?
Like you can feel dejected and simply sigh!
Or scream your agony out!

Some how that should help,
make things controllable
But it doesn't do a dime!

So I pause and gather my thoughts,
Penning my frustration,
at odds that fly in my path
Some how I attract the worst
I feel like that all the time

Then I close my eyes and think!
No there is worse!
I am not there!
With the worst
I am here with the blest.

I have roof over my head
Clothes to wear
A job that pays
Food on the table and
loved ones to care.

This mess is the selfishness pouring
Out of hearts that have forgotten gratefulness
In its place grows restlessness
To seek and infect and thrive on sadness
Till it devours and make its conquest.

Oh Lord, my frustration is overpowering
If you don't do something soon I'll trip
That's not what I'd want cause I'll feel like a wreck
So I turn my gaze to you and reflect
Ask myself, what did you learn today
Did you get buried in your problems
Or did you look up and pray.

You see, the GREAT TEACHER, is watching
Life's little lessons he sends our way
Chapters on human psychology
Management of Time and Stress
His methods are tough
Not meant for the weak
Only the strong, can pass His test.

He never mean't it to be easy
Cause your are just not anybody
But His special treasure
Which He would like to gather
Richer and purer, after a struggle that's worthy
Of His Kingdom so glorious.
Which I await with a sadness, the longer I tarry!

With this experience firmly noted in my life's book
I shall mark it with gladness, for when again history repeats itself
I shall remember to read this lessons with gratefulness
The GIFT of words He gave, so that I can share.
When again frustration raises it ugly head
Armed with HIS words I'll fight my best.

... you have to step
back
in order to

move forward


SoulSurvivor
(C) September 20, 2014

The last man alive
raised his gun
and emptied it
into the sun
as it sank
out of sight
left alone
in the night
he couldn't decide
what he'd won.

Day to day activities
blend into the night ones
as we toil,
act as if
everything
will last forever
& the numbers
balance.

Time the equalizer,
waits in the shadows,
watching everybody,
all the people,
coming & going.

Have you ever wondered
what ever happened
to your first lover?

Life begin the day I saw you
fluttering around you like a school girl
my wings start to flutter
you slung your net to capture
and I am embracing the change....

You dried away the tears
kissed my heart so nice
having transformed before your very eyes
then I awaken to a million kisses
and I have embraced the change...

You lift me up to your very soul
lick the tips of my toes
sing to me your melody
arising to the morning sun
as I approach I say, I have embraced your change...

The water was soothing to my face
you hold me so very very close
my clothes are shredded
my feet grounded in soft ground
my darling, I am ready for your change...

Debbie Brooks 2014