i tell ya brother
it's a blessing and a curse
sorting one and another
deciding who comes first

"he who is without sin"
let him cast the first stone
will the faith or doubt win?
of a soul that's left alone

i tell ya brother
it's a heaven and a hell
the fate that belongs to others
it belongs to you as well

Icarus will learn
To not fly too close to the sun
Only when the beads of sweat
Are mixing with the melted wax
Dripping down his youthful back
Icarus will learn
To not fly higher than he should
Only when his fragile wings
His hopes and dreams have failed him
And he is falling from the sky
Icarus will learn
Of this I'm sure
But he'll only learn
When it's way to late
And the mistakes he made
Can't be fixed
Icarus will learn
But it won't matter

Just...
*******

Cold as the morning
cold as my blue heart
we don't have
to hold something
to feel its absence
to know its significance
we are drawn for reasons
beyond our limited sense
of time and space.

Each moment is
a turning point
we get to choose
whether to anchor in
isolation's safe harbor
or tell stagnant fear
to *******
we'd rather live
exposed and free

fill every cell
until brimming over
with all the love
that is destined
to flow our way
even the kind
that defies description
will forever be
the singularity.

We are alive
the ink is still drying
on this page
there are choruses
yet to be sung
love is
open
come in
out of the cold.

Written off as a label, condemned to live the wrong life
But wanting to go back and say sorry for what he's done.
Once he realizes there's no going back, that's he's doomed to hearing 'she'
It's enough to make him realize his debt was great
So great that it must last his whole life.

Even if he changes his body he'll always have scars
To pay for the ones he gave to girls
And to those that were different who he used to shame.

That fateful night when he stupidly wished
To come back as a girl, to run away from his problems.
He was an idiot, a liar and a cheat
And he deserved every punishment he got.

But now that he knows he can't escape, he can't hit rewind
He just wants to end the pain and he wants sympathy
But even if he got it, what would that do?
What if he's just sorry he was caught?

I beg you, please change me back
Please stop me from being such an ***
I repent from my thoughtless and ignorant remarks
Because this is the worst punishment of all!
To become the labels that bring pain and sorrow
To those I forced them on
And to realize that like them I can't wake up tomorrow
And see who I really am.

My body and life is a lie or some terrible dream
But I can feel it all happening, all tearing at me.
And not just how the body of someone else looks
But at the soul that is in fact me.

Get me out of this cage, make me feel unashamed
To be a man and to face my problems
And to truly repent for my mistakes
And be okay with who I now know myself to be.

I can barely look at her face anymore,
The girl who I wished to become lightly
I just want to be rid of every trace of her
And go back to being simple, better me.

10th April 2016

A cup of fruit punch spills
and stains the clouds
mixing with tomato soup
stains and lemonade

Van Gogh dips his brush
in the royal purple
of early evening
streaking plum across the cosmos

a glass of starlight spills
and night descends

If we were all individually perfect
Then we wouldn't need each other