The first sip of a coffee on a frosty morning
Toss and turn from your yearning
Lost upon years of searching in the Arctic
Following the trail up north

The snow has stopped, temperatures dropped.
Despair not and regret not
that cigarette had to stay warm
All you have are smoke kisses in the air
Or is that just your cold breath?
The only sign of life seen in days

Mind you, the sparrow is like no other
Flying against the wind
Three hundred miles away
And we're having a similar day
Me tethered to this place
While your pace slows with tired feathers

I'm not holding out for something better
These boots still have another year or two to go
Wear and tear occur slowly when one is rooted to the ground
My roots frozen limbs searching still.

And the night falls heavy now
and I am well acquainted with it
For in the winter's darkest hours
Is where my searching will end.

For what an electric winter -
those sparks like whispers in your ears
To pull archaic splinters from your side -
And let them blow in the Arctic winds -
And up to celestial lights -
burning bright bitter blues -
and emeralds and yellows -
and higher still -
breaking Heaven's inner dome -
- higher -  
Ethereal particles of you displayed across the night sky -

And you are a singular multitude
A particular spectacular
Of particles participating
In the dance.

I found no Polaris during the Polar Night.
But a sighting of the famed lights.

Eyes opened and I can see clearly what you are.

All men are born heavy.
We do not inherited this weight
But seize the heaviness of the earth
Upon ourself.
Obligations and connections one can not ignore.

I am not yet light like you.
Floating from place to place.
Uncannily light so that you may travel
To even the moon and back.
Travel refreshes the eyes
But it is my heaviness -
that prevents lunar travel.

To ignore what roots me to the ground
would be to act falsely light.
But you are truly rootless.
Born lighter than a feather -
how can you be so unnatural?

Unlike you, I will have to earn my lightness.
But even then my body will still be heavy
But not lightless.

I don't know what I want in this world.
I don't know what is worthwhile on this Earth that can make me smile.

It keeps spinning
And I keep turning over in my mind -
Does mankind even know what it wants?
Are we in love or just bored?
Filling up time before we're buried,
Chasing our tails and tales of how to live.
Tired of this town - strive to leave before it gets you down.
And when you leave you'll take the town with you and start again.

So the Earth keeps spinning.
And I stop smiling at what we think is worthwhile.
Because I don't know, maybe,
I don't want this world.

All is lost - horribly lost.
A terrible break within.

Let the rain pour.
Let the wind blow.
What does it matter now?
All is lost - horrible lost.

Stars shine darkly over me
And the wine-dark sea.
How much can a man endure
Before he finds himself below crimson waters?
A terrible break within.

Unbridled egoism is blocked
By the tyranny of the clock
Sound of feet and clicking pens
Locks one in a dark cage.
All is lost - horribly lost.

Don't ask me to hold up the world as
The collective weight of despair
Only crushes my darkly twisted reality.
Leaving me gasping for air.
A terrible break within.

I am a host to all I have endured.
The tears shed now frost on the memory
That haunts me the most -
Floats around more ghostly than a ghost.
All is lost - horrible lost.

How can one win against original Sin?
Sin slithering beneath skin
And pins your soul down.
There's no positive spin,
A terrible break within.

So now I pay the steep cost.
Allow the coldness to seep in.
*All is lost - horribly lost.
A terrible break within.